Messages By: jettav

I say if this guy was abusive to you then you need to stay away from him, don't even try to make it work. You deserve better. no guy or woman for that matter is worth staying with when they are abusive and disrespectful. If this family wants to hate then let em, but you do not have to be a part of it. Life is meant to be lived happily and productive, not to have your self esteem and self worth kicked around. Respect your self, and love your self and don't stoop to these peoples levels, go live life and be happy and count your blessings with the number one being, you are not with this no good guy who is only out to ruin your life.

Where do you go to meet girls? and how do you carry yourself? (what kind of attitude do you have? Are you a positive person? and how do you view life? Are you happy with yourself?). maybe just a few questions to ask yourself. You seem like a very positive person and if that is the case, I believe you will find that right person. Be true to your self and enjoy life and don't fall for the losers. Life is so full of great things and opportunities, don't be so hard on your self. be happy,polite, and set goals and strive for them, know what you want in a girl and don't settle for less.I believe it is more imporant to see a person from the inside then from the out as looks can be very deceiving. And I do know a little about how you are feeling. When I was dating my now husband, I was a littel over weight and I really wasn't that pretty, there was a young girl interested in him and thought he could do better and she was flirting around and really trying to get his attention. Yea, she was prettier and younger, even did slightly better then me in school, but it was me who he was falling for and it was me who he thought was the greatest. She may have had the looks but I had what it took to get the man I wanted. Though I was happy with life as a single person and all, there were times when I didn't think I was worth having, but my now husband proved all that wrong and he added so much more spark to my already good life. Be positive, kind and respect and love your self and life will definetly treat you well.

actually, my 4 year old is more picky then my 2 year old but what I do now is give my daughter choices and she must choose one of those. It is always something that she likes and always nutricious. That usually goes for snacking times. for meals, I cook meals that I know every one will like something being served, therefore there is no excuse for being hungry. I will sneak a veggie mixed in with mashed potatoes or sliced bananas in banana pudding. I have also discovered things that she likes to make something she doesn't care for more appetizing to her, like she doesn't care for green beans but she loves french fried onions and will eat her green beans with the onions on top. My 2 year old will only eat green beans if she can dip them in catsup! yep, pretty gross, but she is eating green beans now. LOL I have noticed also that taste buds change, so I wouldn't worry about your two year old, maybe make a tray in the refrig with nutricious snacks and let him help himself when he is hungry, my two year loves helping herself to the refrig.

My four year old likes competition and loves to win LOL. So some things we do around here is about competition and the work gets done. She likes to race against the clock, and is now picking up toys within minutes and even volunteering to do some things. Sometimes we even race against each other and her favorite is to get (whatever) done before daddy gets home and she is excited to tell him of her accomplishments. Also giving her a dime or a sticker on her sticker chart does wonders. I don't usually have to tell her more then once to do something and if I do tell her the second time, she loses a privelege. Works fine and dandy in my household,and even my 2 year old is catching on. :)

My 4 year old has imaginary friends as well. What she does is, she changes her voice, she uses her own voice for herself and then when asking a question or just saying something to her imaginary friend, she uses a different voice for the other person. she too has imagined being some one else but not to the extreme that she refuses to be herself, I think getting your daughter involved in preschool or something may help her and though I believe this is probably a phase, I wouldn't worry about it but yet moniter it and maybe document what she is saying and doing. My daughter has a slight disorder where she pulls her hair, when she first started this, we were really worried but didn't know what to do but then when we found out that there is actually a disorder with this, I started documenting and communicating with her like asking her what she was thinking about, and why she just pulled her hair, in her own words, she told me that it "comforts" her, she does this when a change occurs in her life or she is over whelmed/over stimulated. She is a bit of perfectionist and likes things a certain way. after finding all this out, we use only positive reinforcement and try directing her to a new activity or whatever the case may be. We also talk to her about other ways of dealing with the situation. Thankfully it isn't a problem like it was as we discovered it at a very early age are appropiately dealing with it. If it makes you feel better, talk to your doctor about it just to get some professional input, it certainly helped in our case but in all honesty, I think it is probably a phase and I personally wouldn't stress over it, communicate with her and see what she is thinking about at the time, interact with her and listen to her as she plays and talks.

I do not have children in the schools at this time but your message certainly concerns me and another thing to be checked up on before it is time for my children to attend, We have already decided against the public school system as far as our children go, but knowing that the schools are denying this type of care is redicoulous and wrong, the schools need to be held accountable in taking care of the kids properly and need to have experienced and knowledgeable staff on hand. I think if you supply all the things that your child needs and I am sure they have medical and shot records on file and everything concerning your sons health needs to be documented. I would certainlly keep pursuing this and don't stop til you find the help that you need. Have you actually talked to a lawyer about this and seeing what your options are. Getting advice and some professional input certainly would not hurt. And to be perfectly honest, I personally would have a hard time sending my child to a system that doesn't have the staff to over see medical conditions, too bad that the school doesn't think hiring a full time nurse is a good investment...........

It certainly is up to us as parents to teach and guide our children in making the right choices in life and how they eat depends on us as parents. if we want our children to eat healthy then we need to be the ones to teach and encourage this. One thing I do is, I give them choices and they have to choose something from that choice list and if they refuse everything, then too bad, they don't eat. Your spouse is definetly depriving your kids of the nutrition that they need and as long as she allows them to manipulate her and to allow them to cause this tension between the two of you, then she certainly will reap some regrets. Who is the primary grocer shopper in your home? Maybe this is a task that you can do. And I would avoid buying that stuff. Maybe find some recipe books and together as a family go through them and decide on a couple of new foods together and depending on the age of your children of course., let them help prepare the meal. Maybe go out and buy the ingredients for a home made pizza and let them help make it. You can also buy frozen ravioli where you cook it and add your own ingredients, add some peas to the sauce and mix it all together, This kind of stuff works with my 4 year old who is a picky eater. I would keep trying to introduce a new food on a regular basis, encourage the kids to take so many bite, My daughter has to take 4 bites becasue she is 4 years old. I think you and yuour spouse really need some alone time and discuss this and come upo with some ideas together and try to get on the same page otherwise, your kids will continue to play her against you and vice versa, they need to learn to respect both of you and the two of you need to respect one another. Though it is discouraging and you may feel like you are fighting a losing battle, don't give in to them. Keep communicating with your spouse and keep encouraging the kids to eat healthy.

Maybe instead of focusing on all the negative, maybe start focusing on the positive things about your husband. True love can be "real" and for "sure" if you allow it to. Life itself is whatever you make of it. No one is perfect and we all have our flaws but to dwell on the negative is nothing but a waste of time in my opinion, I would much whether dwell on the positive and be happy and do everything in my power to make my marriage and love stronger. It certainly takes the effort to to be happy and to stay in love with your spouse but to me it is well worth my time and energy. And really, if two people are really in love, it really doesn't take hard/depresssing effort, just enough to keep the fire burning. :) After 12 years of marriage, I can honestly say that I am still in love with my husband and even though we have our off moments there is never a doubt in my mind that he is my true and only love. We are happy and have benefitted each other in so many ways. True love is real and can last a life time and it doesn't have to be a "chore" but could be an adventure. I think when it comes to my hubby, he actually has more positive about him then he does negatives and when things doesn't feel like they should and the negative aspect of our relationship does creep up, I replace those thought with happy/positive thoughts and the whole attitude changes, not always easy but it does work and we have a great relationship.

you will always know who your true friends are when something happens in your life. I have many friends but the truest friends are those who have stood by my side through thick and thin, regardless of whether or not they have agreed with a decission that I have made. My best friend from high school disagreed with a decission that I had made and did everything in her power to get me to change my mind, of course I didn't as I knew it was a good decission for my life and as it turned out, I did make the right decission. I have had other cicumstances as well, A true friend will not betray a friendship but will be there to respect and to support the other as well as to encourage and to uplift. My high school friend adndI are once again best buddies though we live seveal hours from each other cause finally she came to realize (after a few years)that I was right and she did apologize and she now understands that if you want to be a friend then you gotta be a friend. For those who do not want to be my friend for whatever reason, well, I have come to the conclusion that it is their problem, not mine and though it makes me sad when something like this happens, I know that I cannot control what others do or think, I can only control my own self. " A friend sticks closer then a brother". Though I have my best friend from school back, I have another best friend who is now walking the streets of heaven and I wish she was here talking with me as we had done for several years. I miss our times and don't think I will ever meet another like her. We need to take our friendships serious and love and respect one another and those who betray, I say, "so sad", for there could come a time when we don't have our friend around......................

Not always the easiest but can be done. recycling, coupons, freeze left overs, bargain shopping, I buy absolutely nothing at regular price. store brands are just as good as the national brand. use the lay a way plan instead of credit cards. cheap if not free entertainment, sharing meals in a restaurante( alot of restaurantes serve way too much food per serving). we save all our change, it goes into a container and it adds up to dollars. living within our means isn't always easy but really is the best. We figure out what is imporant and what we need and do not need, I have had yard sales to get rid of unused/unwanted things (not too often as I have a habit of giving things away :).I am a stay at home mom and I wouldn't have it any other way. My husabnd and I have discussed this issue many times and always come up with the conclusion that it just wouldn't be worth sending our kids to day care, it would add another expense and in my profession, I wouldn't make much, it would all end up going to day care and I personally enjoy having my kids home with me and they are happy and content. My husabnd is working two jobs at this time because we are in the process of starting our own business and it takes money to make money. We just try to use common sense and not to get over our heads.