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Messages By: mswing10

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September 17, 2005, 6:06 pm CDT

Agree

Quote From: auburnjenn

I thought Jay's experiment was flawed and would like to have seen it done with someone who isn't famous or recognizable. Part of why everyone was talking to him the second time around was because they knew who he was!
I would have been disturbed by "disguised Jay" because he did look creepy. I don't think he looked "unattractive" - he just looked like a man who was unkempt and did not care about his appearance. His personality matched this and I thought he began acting odd. He didn't have the glowing personality he did when he was himself. Besides, I would never talk to any man who accosted me in the mall or accept a drink from a stranger who was sitting in the shadows alone. 
One of my best friends worked at Victoria's Secret in college and had horror stories about the perverts that would come in there and do/say all kinds of bizarre things. I think it is uncomfortable when ANY man is hanging out in bikini or lingerie stores.  
Good try on the experiment, but I think several other dimensions could have been added to it to make it more interesting!

I also felt the experiment was flawed for those reasons.  I know that it happens though...sure of it.   

It did surprise me to hear Dr Phil's comment in the end about how he looked perverted.  Kind of unkind and totally what the show was about. 

 
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September 17, 2005, 6:12 pm CDT

Almost scared to watch the show

Just watching the preview made me so sad.  If this is just a few moments of abuse in that girl's life, image how far it really goes.   

One thing it made me conscious of is my own mouth.  Gosh, we have to be so careful how we talk to our kids and not react...just respond.  For example, my three year old is a very touchy girl...this is her way of expressing and receiving love.  But sometimes her little uncoordinated arms and legs cause pain and she doesn't realize it.  Today, I tripped on something she had left out  and really hurt my leg.  i was holding her at the time and rather than do my usual yelping and yes, sometimes yelling...I just sucked it up and kept holding her telling her it wasn't her fault - man it hurt! 

So, this lady may be too late to learn her lesson...but we as moms and dads can learn from her and curtail our "outbursts" more.   

 
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surprised
September 17, 2005, 6:23 pm CDT

A response

Quote From: pragmatic

response to dr. phil's condo giveaway anouncement to the family in houston--nice gesture, but did you do a background check on these people---like are they clean and will they swear to keep up their new condo in EXACTLY the same manner as their neighbors do theirs???? if they do not---will YOU DOC go there and personally clean the premises YOUSELF---that is right---YOURSELF!!!!! these people and you doc have a responsibility to the new neighbors!!!!! helping is great, BUT there are RESPONSIBILITIES that go with that. america has been slowly losing this awareness since LBJ's great society started. remember doc---you need to clean it YOURSELF if they do not---don't hire it done!!!!!

I'm fairly certain that a man of his common sense would be conscious of this.  And, if this happens, I don't think it is necessary for him to personally clean it when someone can be hired to do this.  Your post sounds a lot like  a "not in my neighborhood" rant.  Maybe you should get out there and help some people and really get the sense of what it feels like to lift someone up when they need it the most.  Will there be people who take advantage of this...of course.  However, if you help one person to help themselves - it totally makes it worth it.   

 
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September 17, 2005, 6:26 pm CDT

My husband

My husband is experiencing this this right now.  I'm amazed at how cruel people can be. 
 
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October 7, 2005, 7:32 pm CDT

Breastfeeding in public is fine folks

There's nothing wrong with feeding your child in public by breastfeeding...but I also think you should be sensitive to other people's feelings about pulling out your breast and not covering up.  I had no issue doing this and no one ever had an issue with me.  In fact, I got quiet a few smiles from other mothers who understood and were thankful that the baby's crying stopped.   

Trick I learned.  When you are out shopping, you don't have to go to the bathroom.  Ask politely to use the dressing rooms where you can sit quietly in private without being in a disgusting bathroom.  A toilet has one purpose, to rid ourselves of waste - not supply nutrition.  There are also nursing aprons that work great in restaraunts.   

 
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November 26, 2005, 5:31 pm CST

You can't know the whole story

Quote From: outsider1

I find that a big parenting problem is that some parents want kids but they don't want to be "parents".  You know the type.... the ones that you see in malls that let their kids run amok and they don't even do anything to stop them because they're too lazy to discipline them.
As the daughter of a 3 1/2 year old, I'm wondering why you would assume that these people "dont' want to be parents". You cannot possibly understand the thoughts of the parents you see that define their actions.  They may not feel this way or be lazy, they may just believe in a different type of parenting - a more free approach.  They may also have had poor parenting themselves.  To say that they don't want to be parents or are lazy is an assumtion on your part, that is in my opinion, a bit lazy as well.  Lazy and assumptive thinking. 
 
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November 26, 2005, 5:38 pm CST

Judgemental of other people

I've found some of the comments on this board to be very judgemental.  Being a parent is very hard work, and an almost impossible task to get perfect if you've had poor parenting in the past yourself.  These people have come to the show for help (even Gotti).  Do you think they want their kids to do this?  This is not how they dreamed it would be. 

All they asked for was help and tips.  These parents want to do better and should be commended for recognizing the problem and asking for direction.   

So, if you are a parent with perfect kids...congratulations.  Use your knowledge to help in a kind way - or not at all.   

 
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November 26, 2005, 5:41 pm CST

Dont' worry about it

Quote From: daffie1201

I have tried every thing to get my two year old to go poot on the toilet, but he wont he jusr crys. He was doing for a little bit but then stoped. He knows he he goes in his pull-ups and will tell you what he has done. If you tell him to got to the poty he tells you NO. It is so fustrating cause he wont do it. I told him he would get to wear big boy under wear and he says NO. We try to read books on the potty sing songs he just gets down. He will put his potty chair up there and flush the toilet, but no go. He will even tell you when he is stinky. So I know what he is doing. Some please help me.
He's just not ready and that is ok.  My daughter is 3 1/2 and started urinating in the toilet about 2 months ago, and is just being to poop on it.  They all get it eventually and 2 is still very young for it.  Just keep up the routine of sending him to the bathroom and stop asking him if he has to go or not.  Just say "it's time to try the potty again".  Congratulate him for trying and let him know he is very successful at that task alone.  No kid goes to college in diapers and he won't either. 
 
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November 26, 2005, 5:45 pm CST

Yikes!

Quote From: heavens

I'm a single mommy with 2 kids, a 2  1/2 year old, and a 16 month old.  My 2 1/2 year old will sit on her potty chair, when i ask her to.  She can pee in it and will even watch when she goes.  She is showing all the signs of being ready to potty train, except one.  No matter what I do I can not seem to get her to tell me when she needs to pee.   She will point to it afterwards or fuss as she is having the accident.  I am trying really hard not to push her.  The other problem i am having with her, is she will take her poop out of her training pants or diaper and spread it all over my walls, windows, anywhere.  I've tried redirecting, time outs, showing her where it is supposed to go, putting zip up sleepers on her, I'm at a loss as to how to get her to stop this behavior.  Has any one else ever had this problem?  I've talked to her doctor and was brushed off, even her teachers have no advice.    More than being frustrating for me having to clean it up, its a health risk for her.       

  

  

  

Personally, I think it is great that you aren't pushing it too hard, but the bad behavior is unacceptable.   If I had that issue, I'd lay down the law on the poop smearing stuff.   

Give her the wash rag and show her how to clean it.  Then warn her that if she does this again, she will lose a toy.  She can earn it back if she doesn't do it for a day or two.  It is not ok to do this at all and consequence would be appropriate here.  IMO 

 
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November 26, 2005, 5:48 pm CST

Modeling

Quote From: haley10584

 I have a two year old and a 10 month old and I need help on how to potty train a boy with a 10 month old and hardly no time.. I have tried and everytime I get him on the toliet she crys for something( bottle, shes wet, etc) Any ideas this is my first time potty training and I have no idea what to do He tells me he peed after he does it in his pull up it is like he doesnt feel it until it comes but if I sit him on the toliet he goes sometimes.. Help please someone

2 years old could be too young.  So I wouldn't stress about it.   

You might try inviting another mom and her kid who has potty training down over to the house for the afternoon.  Explain to the mom that you are trying to potty train and would like her help.  Just have her kid use the potty and have her lavish praise on him/her.  They use that in some daycares effectively.  The kids "model" the good behavior (not literally - the the reaction later from the provider).   

 

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