I agree. It seems to be just the latest issue parents can martyr themselves over. Talk about how they suffer so much having a child with Autism, while they let their child suffer. Or worse, force dangerous "cures" on them like Chelation therapy, which has been known to severly malnutrition people. All in hopes to get rid of supposed bad metals, that might not even be there in the first place.
Alot of people I talk to on the Asperger's Syndrome bulliten boards, I have Asperger's Syndrome. They say people like to only see Autistic/ Aspie children, they don't want to hear about them as adults. It's like once someone who's Autistic or who has Asperger's Syndrome become an adult, they don't exsist anymore. There is no support for them.
In order for there to be shows about Autistic children being ok, there needs to be a change in our society. From parents who cry out, "YOU'RE NOT A PARENT, SO YOU DON'T KNOW ANYTHING!" To parents who say, "You don't know how HARRRRDDDD it is, how much I SUFFER!" They don't say this out loud, but they certainly speak in a way that states these feelings.
We need to start being a society that hold parents up as being responsible as parents. We need to stop feeding what these martyr parents what to hear to them. They have to realize what is important is their child. It's too much for them? Perhaps they shouldn't have been parents then. Don't want to have to hear that? Too bad. While you're going off whinging about how you can't have your little social life anymore, or how you have to spend 24/7 taking care of an Autistic child instead of doing what YOU want to do. Your child is suffering.
The answer isn't to cure them so they can be more self-sufficent, so you can continue with your fantasy of being a parent and having time to do things for yourself, you need to be a better parent. That is the answer. There should be no more of these pity party for parents who didn't realize what they were getting themselves into. Nobody seems to take having a child seriously anymore. It seems when people have children who are "imperfect", they just see it as an excuse to whine about it to anyone within ear-shot instead of doing something about it.
Like the woman on the show, her son did say horrific things to her. However, it's very immature to go on a show and cry over something her child said, when he might not even be able to control saying it. How about talking about helping your child, going to a psychatrist? Doing something. I'm sorry, taking things personally like that from a child who clearly is sick and doesn't realize they're being harmful, is like a over-sensitive child who takes everything personally. The world doesn't revolve around her, she needs to get help for her son. Not go on Dr. Phil and cry cause she didn't realize she'd have to put in extra effort when she had children. Nothing will be accomplished until she realizes her son needs help, and that her wasting time feeling sorry for HERSELF, only is a hinderance to his healing.
You know, maybe I'm nuts. I think it's ok to say you know what, maybe I wouldn't be fit to be a parent. Ok, maybe handling children would be overwhelming for me. Fine, it isn't imperative that you grow up and have children. Perhaps if more people had this view, there would be less children suffering a life in a house where the focus isn't on them, because their parents didn't consider the responsibility of having them.
Maybe there would be more Autistic children, being able to be born to parents who would truely love them and take their time to help them, rather than sit and stew in their own greif over not having the perfect child whom they could leave to take care of themselves at home, while they went off having a life of their own. It seems people really don't understand the concept of, your children are your life, these days.
I know I will be flamed for this message, I'm certain I'll get a bunch of "You're not a parent, you don't knoooooowwwwww" responses. I know what becomes of children who are born to parents, who think raising them is a part-time job. This might not even be an issue, if we lived in a society that said if you're a parent your life should be dedicated to your children. Instead of treating all parents, like high schoolers with little to no sense of responsibility. People who can't tell wether they want to hold a job, or have their social life and go to the prom with their friends. When you have a child, you have to be prepared for anything. Shows like this one about Autism, just feed into the pity party, for parents who were surprised and disheartened, they weren't born a perfect child.
It's not about the parents, it's about the children. Parents, really you need to get over yourselves and focus on helping these Autistic children. Helping them, not trying to cure them, not trying to make them what YOU want from them. Accept them as THEY ARE, and work with them. Maybe you will have to spend the rest of your life taking care of them, maybe that's the hand you've been delt. If you are a real parent, you'd be thankful for the gift to be able to care for someone, who will have unconditional love for you. Instead of mourning the life you could've had if you didn't have children.
