Messages By: tibura

I am a 30 year old who was diagnosed with Type II Bipolar 10 years ago when supposedly only women in their thirties and forties had it. I cried over the first part over the show, because that was me when I wasn't on meds. I have now been on meds consistently for 7 years, but with limited progress. In fact my prognosis is that the extremes in my life are just going to get worse and worse and worse. I have a 2 1/2 year old son who I absolutely adore, but I feel I can't be a good mother to him because I am always stressed out and moody. I need to get a brain imaging done. I most likely have some brain trauma from being hit in the head with an aluminum baseball bat when I was 6 (it was by another kind and was an accident) We can trace my disorder back at least that far. 

The show today was harsh I admit, but honestly I know how those two people feel. I still feel that explosive anger but can control it better because of the meds I am on, but my type is resistant to treatment. I am looking into brain scan imaging in Virginia. If anyone knows anything about it in the Commonwealth, let me know. 

I am resistant to meds and am a rapid cycling Bipolar Type II patient. Trust me, she is bipolar, and I know what she goes throough. I fight everyday with many of the same emotions and I have some relief because of meds. Just remember she is COMPLETELY unmedicated, she sees the world differently than anyone on meds or who is 'normal'

You know everyone seems to thin that bipolar is the same for everyone. It isn't. I have heard voices, but not for several years. I have been abusive, and am much better now, but still have some violent tendencies which I try to control. My meds are working, sort of, I am in desperate search for something that will bring me back to 'normal' and I just mean a level even keel. I am 30 years old and my bipolar II has caused me to become disabled. I cannot live a 'functional life in society' this doesn't mean I can't get along at home or need hospitalization. I have trouble with whirling thoughs and concentration problems. BIPOLAR is DIFFERENT FOR EVERYONE. Don't judge the people on the show. They are there. They asked for help and are trying to get it. Sometimes it takes hitting rock bottom before you can get to that point. I am a loving wife and mother, who sometimes cries uncontrollably, or lashes out in anger over nothing. I have been on various meds for 10 years and my doc is still adjusting them because I am not right yet. I have verbally attacked my (very understandting and completely amazing) husband, and worry I will do that to my 2 year old son. Stop trying to diagnos the people onthe show, or even each other, the docs for the most part know what they are doing and certainly Dr. Phil wouldn't have people on the show he didn't believe were bipolar. Give them, and me, a break. We alll manifest differently. We all respond to treatment differently. The cost of the brain scan is over $3000 and only can diagnose the problem, it doesn't give the docs a specific drug or drugs to try on the patient. I do what I can each day. I work hard to fight the ups and downs I have (I am a rapid cycling BPII), I take my meds, I do therapy. but sometimes that just isn't enough. Even when my meds worked it was only for 2-3 years before I would go back into crisis. I have thought of hurting people and myself at times, not now thankfully, but they are possibilities for bipolar. THERE IS A HUGE RANGE OF SYMPTOMS!! Just because you don't have one or any of the symptoms of someone else doesn't mean they aren't bipolar too you know.