Messages By: smcdaniel

My husband and I love each other very much and have a wonderful relationship.  We have no trouble communicating, no real issues, nothing is wrong.

We were talking the other morning in bed before we got up, and my husband said that sometimes when we have sex, he thinks about other women.  No one woman in particular, and it's not all the time, but I was very surprised by this.  I have no problem with him looking at pornography occasionally; I understand that this is just another sexual outlet and it doesn't bother me at all.  But to think about someone else while we are actually having sex? 

He says it means nothing and that it's normal; that all guys do this sometimes.  Is that right?

I really, really appreciate your taking the time to reply to my question.

I do completely trust my husband, and he has given me absolutely no reason not to trust him.  He is a wonderful person.

Thanks again!

My husband of 3 years just got arrested for indecent exposure; he was arrested before but told me that it was a mistake and his record was expunged.   

He said that it started with pornography, but then progressed with stress to public exposure and sometimes masturbation.  This has been going on since a month before we got married, and he has lied to me about it every day for 3 years.  He says that he is addicted to this behavior, and has an appointment with a sex therapist.   

What do I do?  How can I ever trust this man again?  I take my wedding vows very seriously and I know this sounds stupid, but my husband is a wonderful man and I love him so much.  But I don't know if I should get out now or if he (we) has a chance at a normal life.   

If you know anything about this, please help.  I feel so alone.