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Messages By: tahoe1109

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July 29, 2005, 2:26 pm CDT

Needing a Social Life!

My Husband and I moved into our home almost 2 years ago.  We left all of our friends and family.  Our closest friend or relative is over 2 hours away.  Both of us had an active social life both as a couple and individually prior to the move.  With the exception of each set of parents we have not had a single soul over our house for the length of our current residence. (2 years in OCT) This is not my choice!!

 

 

 

When opportunity arrases, which I am constantly searching for, I bring it up to him...he immediately has an excuse!  "We don't need to bother our neighbors" "we have a 2 yr old, we can't take him" "next week, next month..." 

 

 

 

I am going crazy!  I feel trapped and that he is trying to control me.  I have been very open to meet people at work, however it is a very small company and I do not work with anyone within 10 years of my age! It is a daily struggle getting my husband out of the house, with or without other people.  Even when his family is there he wants to leave!  Other times he wants us to stay in our bedroom and watch TV!! I like movies and all but, I can't do as much as he would like!

 

 

 

I have excused myself trying to find ways for us to meet people.  I have may wants a desires, for example becoming members of a church, inviting the neighbors over, joining a gym ECT... Without these needs I am unhappy.  I have expressed this to my husband on many many occasions.  But, he still wants me sheltered.  Will find any excuse to prevent me from making plans or following through with my needs.  What do I do?  I am really looking for physiological reasons for his behavior.  Please help!

 

 

Questions:

 

Obviously he wants control, how do I get him to compromise?  Give in, give up that control?

 

What reasons would he have to keep me so isolated?

 

How can I get my needs met and still have peace in the home?

 

When expressing my need to have hobbies outside the family, why is he so against it??

 

 

 
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July 29, 2005, 2:36 pm CDT

Balancing Marriage and Family

 

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