Quote From: chiefcookthere is never a "benefit" to siblings being separated in foster care BUT there are just not enough homes. if you have a call for 3 siblings and you only have one bed open then you do what you can but you can't do it all. the problem is that not enough people want to give their time and energy to these children. too many people say "i dont want to get attached and then they send them home". as dr. phil would say "it's not about you".all of these people need to get some education on the impact it has on these children when they are separated from their family. even when the biological family is abusive or neglectful, this is the only worl they know. the primary goal in foster care is reunification with their biological family and if this is not possible then rights are terminated to enable adoption. my husband and i have been foster parents for over 8 years and have adopted 4 children ( 2 sets of siblings). i am sad when i see people go out of the country to adopt children when there are plenty of children right in their backyard who need a loving home. if everyone would quit saying "these poor kids" and take at least 1-2 children in their home we could make a difference.
i think dr. phil should also do a show on adoptive parents who have promised these children a forever home and then changed their mind and the kids are right back in the system. the numbers are frightening.
I believe that the reason a lot of adoptive parents adopt outside of the country is because the system over here makes it extremely difficult to adopt. You see, as long as a child is in foster care, someone is getting money; the case worker, the supervisors, but not the child. Once the child leaves the foster care system, no more money. Sometimes, the biological parent(s) can put up enough roadblocks to make adoption impossible. The National Association of Black Social Workers won't allow Black children to be adopted by non-traditional families; hence the high percentage of African-American children in foster care until age 18.
Often, judges make bad decisions by not only not terminating the parental rights of an abusive parent or parents, but also by placing the child back into an abusive household. An unwed mother-to-be will often put her child up for adoption, fill out the papers, even receive free room, board and medical care from the prospective parents, only to "change her mind" at the last minute. All the adoptive parents have left are a bunch of bills, an empty nursery and broken hearts. With that much frustration, it's not surprising that so people go outside of the U.S. to adopt.
