Messages By: mistyc

It isn't enought to have every possible birth control device available.  We have to make it "OK" to use them.  In my opinion, here in the US, we still have this "cowboy/baptist" attitude toward women.  A women (like me) who sees sex as her own choice, and birth control as just one more medical responsibility, is often labeled a (horrors!) feminist, ie. unnatural man-hater.  Catholic teaching (my own experience here) is STILL saying not to use birth control at all.  So a young girl who wants to keep a boyfriend will choose taking a chance over using birth control - somehow in a twisted patriarchal way, that's the less perverted choice!  Why isn't birth control FREE?  Why is Viagra covered and not birth control - hello!  Being married is no excuse for not protecting yourself.  In fact, being married makes accidental pregnancies more possible, right?  

In the end, I agree that people get what they bargain for.  If I had too many kids already, um, tubes tied / pill / depo provera already!  That way, a sneaky husband can get some fun, but no more kids! 

Putting aside the lies and nonconsentual issues, how can anyone expect to have a good marriage when there is no time for the couple to build their foundation before there are babies.  My husband and I didn't decide to start our family until we had been married long enough to know that we were compatible and we knew we were ready to take on that challenge.  We had our careers started and we were living in a community where we wanted to stay. 

Even though our first child was born after our 9th anniversary, it was a big adjustment and we still had to overcome some issues. Planning on having a baby immediately after marriage sounds like you are asking for trouble.    

A happy and successful marriage isn't automatic, even when both spouses are completely into getting married.  Using pregnancy and trickery to trap someone into a marriage they otherwise wouldn't choose is a mistake. 

Greed is a terrible thing. The real tragedy of it is, that you "spend" so much of your life being greedy that when you maybe get the money that you wanted, the money is  worthless because of the life that you've "spent" 

You know those women just wanted to get their hands on Grandmas land so they could split it up and have fake nails put on every week, or go to the hairdressers more often.  Which, once the land and money is theirs, they can do with it what they want- but kudos for Gram for holding out on the vultures!!!!! 

My Gram was the coolest woman in the world. She has been gone 4 years now and I miss her every damn day, keep her picture on my refrigerator and tell my kids stories  involving her. We live in her house. She kept wanting to sign it over to me, my brother and sister wanted me to have it,and I told them that our  mother would have a fit if she did. So, she left it in my mothers name. Today, after paying rent  to buy for 6 years on the house, (32,400, total) and giving my mother another 30,000 down payment, we are buying the house!!!!!!!!! We will have a 50,000 mortgage on a house which I believe is a mansion of memories, and it was worth every last penny. Jimmy Carter may be the great "peace keeper", but he has a rival in me!!!!! 

I can't believe that spoiled girl who wants  a  lexus! It could be how I was brought up, but I've never been impressed by brand names. I'm not sure if her day on the farm is going to get through to her as much as when she doesn't get stuff that costs nearly as much as my rent for free! A purse for 350.00? That's gotta be one damn fine purse, indestructible. Heck, for that price, it should come with money. 

I agree w/ Dr. Phil that it's not all her fault, she was brought up this way, spoiled rotten. SHe has no idea how hard it is to earn money.  It may sound very sheltered of me to say this, and it may be the truth, but I never knew people like that existed aside from Paris Hilton, and Simple Life esque television shows. 

I am 27, and have paid for my own vehicles, gas, ect for my entire life. My parents helped me out when I needed it, and since then I have helped them out when they needed it. Its what family does, and part of what family is about.  True, I do have some nice things, like my truck ( used), and my rings I've rec'd as gifts. I do not mind paying money for something of quality, something I really want and am willing to work for.  

I just don't get it that people can be so materialistic. They are insane to give a girl that young a lexus. Imagine the insurance on that thing? The insurance payments alone would be more than what most people have as a monthly car/truck payment.  

Where am I going with this? I don't know, more or less venting, and using this show as a primer on what i do not want to instill in my future children. 

... 

On the topic of the jock godfather and his band god daughter. Having been in band for many years, I was always made fun of and teased for it. I can be athletic, but I do not enjoy team sports. In my experience, it's way to competitive with in the team itself and not the team working together. Not all athletes act the way that the godfather did on the show, but many of them do. It's a bad stereotype, but it does have some truth. I'm glad that he changed his tune ( pun intended). It was definitely a flashback to watch that segment, and it makes me wonder how many people who made fun of me still feel the same way about band people. Sports can be very taxing, both mentally and physically, but so are many other persuits.