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Messages By: momof2tn

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September 8, 2005, 7:14 am CDT

At What Age do U tell Children Real Reason Father Left

Myproblem that I am looking for advice is, I have 2 children one is 15 the other 12. About 8 years ago there father (my husband) walked out of are lives to live elsewhere. When we told the kids, he told them he didn't love there mother anymore and he would be happier living somewhere else. It was a really tough time for my children, they were 7 and 4, but though the years we have made life wonderful for us. He does have ever two week visitation, but not the best type of parent. Really not there for the children at all. My problem is, the real reason he left was he had a girl friend, which I didnt no til after he was gone, but 100 & 10% sure they were seeing each other while we were married. He did live with her for a while then split. Always say it was the biggest mistake he has ever made. To get to the problem, I live in a small town where he grew up, he lives about 1 hour away. When he left 8 years ago everyone in the town new he left for the girl friend. I am now concerned as my children get older what would happen if they find out. I am and don't want to protect my ex from his actions but I will always want to protect my children. I just wonder if at some time in there lives someone will tell them, will they hate me for not telling that to start with? I felt they were way too young, but I think once they find out the truth they will feel alot of hated feeling toward there father. Can anyone give me some advice as to what is the best for the children. Also, who should tell them, if there father is still denining it, should I tell them.. They did meet and know the girl friend, but they were too little to really understand what was going on thank you
 
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September 8, 2005, 10:53 am CDT

General Advice

Quote From: babybacker

During December, my family is going to Disneyland.  This year, we are hoping to take my 12 year old niece.  Does anyone have any suggestions on traveling with a 12 year old?
Yes I have a 12 year old son, and a 15 year old daughter. I would recommend, word search books, reading books, if you have a travel dvd player, borrow from the library "Mary Kate and Ashley" movies.  Also, like hand held little games, they sell yazzee, hangman, different types like that. Holp I helped alittle.
 
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September 9, 2005, 5:52 am CDT

Help with when to talk with Children about Father

Myproblem that I am looking for advice is, I have 2 children one is 15 the other 12. About 8 years ago there father (my husband) walked out of are lives to live elsewhere. When we told the kids, he told them he didn't love there mother anymore and he would be happier living somewhere else. It was a really tough time for my children, they were 7 and 4, but though the years we have made life wonderful for us. He does have ever two week visitation, but not the best type of parent. Really not there for the children at all. My problem is, the real reason he left was he had a girl friend, which I didnt no til after he was gone, but 100 & 10% sure they were seeing each other while we were married. He did live with her for a while then split. Always say it was the biggest mistake he has ever made. To get to the problem, I live in a small town where he grew up, he lives about 1 hour away. When he left 8 years ago everyone in the town new he left for the girl friend. I am now concerned as my children get older what would happen if they find out. I am and don't want to protect my ex from his actions but I will always want to protect my children. I just wonder if at some time in there lives someone will tell them, will they hate me for not telling that to start with? I felt they were way too young, but I think once they find out the truth they will feel alot of hated feeling toward there father. Can anyone give me some advice as to what is the best for the children. Also, who should tell them, if there father is still denining it, should I tell them.. They did meet and know the girl friend, but they were too little to really understand what was going on thank you
 

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