Messages By: angieasmom

Yes I know the point was to lock the doors so the girls could get out and only the mother get in! But exactly how does that work? The only thing I can think of to keep the dad out would be a lock with a key, right? Well, if there is a fire in the house the mom does not need to be fumbling with a key to try and get her daughters out. A motion sensor seems like a much more reasonable idea, that way the wife knows when her husband is up and out of his room and she can try to make sure he IS safe. If they just go with locked doors and the wife is sleeping in another room he could sleepwalk out of the house and hurt himself or an innocent person!!!! None of this stuff will stop him from having night terrrors but they have to do something for the safety of all until he finds something that helps him get them under control!

Yes, if you would read my post I said that the only way the waking slightly works is if the person has regular night terrors! I posted this information for people to read and consider if they happen to have a situation where a loved one has REGULAR night terrors. I never said it was information or advice for everyone!! This worked in the past with my son because he had REGULAR night terrors, but now that he doesn't have regular ones this method doesn't work!!

Yea sure, we can leave the advise to the professionals but not all professionals  have good, safe advice. NOBODY could convince me that EVERY SPECK of advice Dr. Phil has ever given out is good advice! I like some of Dr. Phil's shows but I don't always agree with his advice, that is my right!! People have to also use their own common sense to realize that locking doors and tying people to a bed is NOT safe!! That is a no brainer!

The problem that can arise is people become such devoted "Dr. Phil" fans and try to use every piece of advice he gives just because they are a fan. Everyone needs to look at the advice and figure out for themselves if the advice is right for them or not! This is a message board for all kinds of opinions and my opinion is that it was bad advice. I'm allowed my opinion!

I'm certainly not going to argue round and round with you on this message board. I've stated my opinion and I'm sticking with it!

Angie

I will spell this out for you and some of the others on this board who are not understanding where many of us are coming from!

The main thing we are trying to say is that Dr. Phil should have had Alex evaluated and should have completed the brain scan BEFORE filming the show. BECAUSE the viewing audience DID NOT know of Alexs' MULTIPLE diagnosis' when watching the show. The show announced that it would be talking about ASPERGER'S. Yes, many children do have multiple diagnosis', I know this, Dr. Phil knows this and I think you know this....BUT many, many people out there don't know that there can be multiple diagnosis'!!! They were told the show was about "JUST" Asperger's. They were under the impression that Alex only had Asperger's. Do you see what I am saying?

It's nothing personal against you! The main thing I think most people had a problem with was the screaming and swearing at Alex! And from reading some of the latest posts I understand you are working on that, that is good because most children, especially those on the spectrum do not handle screaming very well.

Now that he has had the brain scan what is the treatment?

The reason we all want to see Dr. Phil have Dr. Tony Attwood on a show or series of shows is because Dr. Attwood knows more about Asperger's Syndrome than anyone in this world. If you've seen his videos and read his books you would see this. And the point of an Asperger's show is too help everyone understand Asperger's and Dr. Attwood is the best person to explain this. Dr. Phil doesn't specialize in Asperger's, Dr. Attwood does. And maybe his suggestions don't work for Alex, but you have to remember that Alex also has a mood disorder which is not part of AS but is a seperate diagnosis in addition to AS.

Carol Gray's methods may not work for Alex either because of the additional mood disorder. The show was supposed to be about JUST Asperger's Syndrome. And that is why these people should be considered as guests on a new AS show.

Since you do not know who Carol Gray or Carol Stock are here are their websites http://www.thegraycenter.org/
http://www.out-of-sync-child.com/

When/If Dr. Phil does another show or series of shows it needs to be done ONLY to inform people about Asperger's and/or the Autism Spectrum. Of course they can and should talk about what other diagnosis' people on the spectrum can have. This is why I am hoping that Dr. Phil will do a series of shows that are informative about the spectrum and not just concentrate on one family. Because he concentrated on your family and your families particular problems they did not have time to inform people about Asperger's in general. There is so much information that needs to get out there that I just do not see how it could even be done in one show.

Hopefully now people can stop bickering on this message board and concentrate on the real issue at hand........Educating people about Asperger's and Autism Spectrum Disorder's.

Angie

Hi bbidall,

In the huge controversy over mercury it hasn't been proven either way if mercury is the "cause" of autism or not. (in our case our son inherited AS from his dad) Of course I don't want mercury injected into my kids and I do make sure their vaccines are Thimerosal free, but that's not what I'm getting at!! (Thankfully I live in a state that has banned Thimerosal completely!)

I'm saying that so many people spend so much time, pointing fingers at where their child's autism came from. They already know their child has autism, now if they would spend their energies advocating for and assisting their children in positive ways that help their children.

<<<Whether or not other people "co-exist with him in harmony" has no bearing at all on these things.>>>

I'm curious as to why you would say this? Our children should be free to be who they are, think how they think and feel how they feel without being made to feel like they are broken and in need of change! Our children should not have to change for other people, they should be taught to be proud of who they are and many times they are not allowed to do that because too many people are uneducated about AS. Schools also need to be made to teach all students diversity, acceptance and tolerance, so many kids these days are so cruel!! And don't get me wrong, there are common rules that need to be followed and these things need to be taught to our kids in a positive manner. Of course we want our kids to "live the most pain-free and trouble-free life" they can. But we can't expect them to do all the changing. If Dr. Phil does do another show this will of course help other people out there to get a diagnosis but it will also spread awareness to people who have no clue about AS and may very likely come across a person or two with AS in their lifetime (and hopefully they will be understanding and accepting).

<<<If changing my son's diet to eliminate certain foods (such as wheat) enables him to pay better attention without meds, do you think I'm going to feed him chicken nuggets all day long?>>>

Sure I agree with you, I keep artificial colors out of my kids' diets. I never said we shouldn't feed our children foods that work for them.

I still don't see how all the things that need to be covered will fit into one show so hopefully Dr. Phil will do a series of shows to cover the entire spectrum. So people can see how some kids excel in school and others have LD's, how some kids have the gastrointestinal problems and some kids don't, how some kids are passive and others aren't quite so, how some kids have sensory issues and some don't etc etc etc. People need to see how different all AS kids are, and how they are yet so alike. :) I just know that the show he did do totally gave the wrong impression of AS.

Let's just all hope for a new show or series of shows that cover everything from symptoms to getting a diagnosis to handling all the situations we all go through.

Angie

I know I've asked and so have many many others,  apparently nobody is going to share this information *sigh*

Must be something to hide?

Angie 

Linda,

I agree with you 100%, so many of us have been saying this from the beginning. Treat your child with respect and do a little research into every problem they have and Ta Daaaa!

That brain scan didn't solve anything, the parents actually decided to listen to so many who have told them to stop screaming at him and in return his mood and behaviors are better. I hope others who were thinking about breaking the bank to get brain scans get it now!

<<<People contribute to the alleged 'mood swings' by they way they handle an Aspie>>>

Exactly!!! All a person on the spectrum does is react the only way they know how to each troubling situation. My son used to bite himself and hit himself when he was frustrated, but we taught him that he could hit or bite a pillow, for example, and now that he is more mature & several years later he is handling his frustrations with dignity, because he was given the tools he needed to learn to cope with his frustrations, not screamed at!! The resources are out there.

:)

Angie
http://forums.delphiforums.com/asfamily/start

  <<<It also doesn't mean that your son has it because his dad does - they may both have the susceptible gene and that mercury just sent your son over the edge.   I suspect my brother is also an Aspie but there are big differences, differences that double the mercury would DEFINITELY have been responsible for.>>>

But, you are still missing my point of how I feel...I don't care at this point where my son's AS came from, nor did I ever care, all I know is we were so happy to have a diagnosis 5 years ago to explain everything that was going on. That isn't something that I'm willing to spend all my time on. The fact is that he has AS and now I focus on helping him with things he needs help with and doing what I can to help others to understand AS and my son. I don’t get into all these “therapies” in hopes to cure my child like so many do. Of course I want to keep things like mercury out of my kids but not because I believe it causes autism but because it is just not healthy for them in general.

<<<As for others co-existing in harmony with him - it's not that I don't agree that it needs to be a way of life.  I do.    Our kids *can't* change and I agree education is needed.   But we are talking really basic knowledge here.   We are talking priorities!   The parents of the kids don't even know anything!!!!!!  Shouldn't that come first?  Shouldn't they know how to deal with their children before they ask the rest of the country to?   That is why I said it has nothing to do with the bottom line of why we need these shows. >>>

The rest of the country can still be educated at the same time as the parents. People in this world need to be more accepting of EVERYONE!

<<<It also has nothing to do with whether or not my son is able to do his best in school, etc.  Parents need to be taught advocacy, kids need to be taught self-advocacy.   We don't have issues in school with many people picking on him and the like.  Our district has a zero tolerance policy for BS.  That's because I educated myself enough to be an advocate and get on their proverbial case.>>>

Yes, parents and children need to be taught advocacy. But at the same time the rest of the world needs to be taught tolerance, acceptance and diversity. When our kids take one step forward, some cruel person comes along and sets them back two steps.
<<<My son got cornered in the boys' bathroom.  ONCE.  I made one phone call, one to the principal, and the threat of one to an attorney, and they removed the boys' bathroom doors in the elementary school and started a district-wide bullying program.  And we are NOT a rich district, we are a rural one.   The key was what I KNEW.    If I had not educated myself, then I would not have known what to say to the guy to get the district to comply.  Parents of special needs kids need to know how to do that. >>>

Yep, parents do need to be aware of this. This is why I am hoping Dr. Phil will do a series to cover everything.

<<<Another thing is - Some people just don't bother doing the research >>>

Yes, I agree, people just don’t do the research. To me it comes naturally, I’m a big Googler, LOL. It doesn’t take much effort.

<<<It WOULD be great to have a series of shows, wouldn't it? >>

Yes it would, I’ve metioned it so many times, hopefully the Dr. Phil staff is paying attention. There just has to be a series because there is just too much stuff to cover.

<<<But like I said, the more that people see here, the more educating we do.  As a teacher, I feel I have an obligation to help people, and I do that best by educating.>>>

Yes, this is why I voluteer my time at Asperger’s Family Forum on Delphi Forums.

Angie

http://forums.delphiforums.com/asfamily/start