Messages By: dannysgirl

Quote From: divergrl75

I have dated this guy for 5.5 years. I am 30 and he is 33. He finally poped the question and we got engaged.  Sometimes I feel like we are really just roomates.  Here's some reasons why. One time I was out with some friends and they left and I got stranded downtown. It happens in large crowds.  So, I called up my boyfriend to pick me up and he didn't pick up the phone so I had no phone book with me and only twenty dollars.  It wasn't enough to get home via cab.  I hitchiked home and when I got home the phone was unplugged. I plugged the phone back in and there were my messages.  I got really upset because he had the energy to get out of bed and disconnect the line but not to answer the phone or pick me up.  I need to know if I'm making a mistake by calling it off and moving forward alone.  I'm going through some tough times at work and only working small hours and not making a lot of money.  we had a deal where I paid for the bills and groceries and he paid for the rent.  With the small amount of money I get, I focuss on paying the bills and THEN I go grocery shopping with what I have left. As I mentioned, I haven't been working as much so I haven't made a whole lot.  I paid off our bills but this time I couldn't afford to buy groceries.  When he found out I couldn't afford to buy groceries, he got mad and said that he would buy them AGAIN and that I am not to eat his food.  I thought we were suppose to be a team.  Several times I do remember buying with little that I have I would still buy him what he wanted.  Another thing that bothers me is that after 5.5 years he still can't say he loves me.  Guys just say that he has a hard time expressing himself.  I need to know the truth. I mean come on.  FIVE years and he still can't say it?  I quit eating his food and started to sleep on the couch. I figure that if he wants to treat me like a roomate, I will act like a roomate and completely cut him off from sex and sleep on the couch. I have been feeling so empty and it's making me wonder why I am with him.  I found out that when he was younger his mother didn't want anything to do with him and that it was only till he ws a teenager that she just got involved in his life.  His father is a lot like him.  Another thing I don't like is that he doesn't understand why I get upset about him looking at internet porn/girls.  At first it really didn't bother me then the more I thought about it, It did bother me.  He can look at other woman and can't say he loves me or even show me he loves me. That is why I feel so crappy.  I'm not getting or feeling any love from him.  It all comes down to this ring he bought me.........I think it was a "shut up" ring.  He doesn't like to talk about setting a date (It's been 3 months) he told his friend when he asked when were getting married 2 years from now.  I gave back the ring and now I'm thinking I made a mistake. I'm feeling really confused because I love him. I have already spoke to him about how I feel and he sais that he wouldn't be with me if he didn't care or love me.  How can I get him to say he loves me and to start being a fiance instead of a roomate.   Or, am I really wasting my time with this one.  He woke up this morning and just left to work without saying goodbye.  He's making out like nothing is wrong or like he doesn't care.  Any Ideas?