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Messages By: shikama

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October 4, 2005, 8:09 pm CDT

I'm right there now!

Quote From: ezeltjie

Well, first of all, I am not a very confident person, I never was, and I doubt if I ever will be.  I used to be alot thinner and was pretty ok to look at.  I fell pregnant last year, my little boy is now 3 months old.  The problem I have is that I find it very difficult to get over that fact that I had a baby and will probably never look the same as I did before. My body is a total mess, I have ugly scarring from the caesar, and it looks like I ran naked through a hail storm.  It really is difficult for me to accept all that has happened, and to make it worse, my boyfriend who is also the father of our child, loves & appreciates the female body.  He is forever looking at women on the net, naked (not porn though) or in provocative underwear.  This doesn't really help my self-esteem.  This makes me feel even worse, because I would give the world to look like that for him.  He always tells me that he loves me, and that he doesn't mind the way my body looks after the baby, because he loves me.  Is the problem with me?  Am I making unnecessary strife between us?  I cannot help the way I feel.  As if motherhood isn't tough enough, I have to walk around all day feeling like I'm ugly. Although I could never imagine my life without my little boy in it, and that everything else is worthwhile, I am really struggling to cope looking in the mirror everyday.  It is so bad, because me and my boyfriend used to have a very exciting sex life.  I mean I had a nice body & I'm a very sexual person in general.  But now, I don't like it when he sees me naked, I always cover myself if he walks into the room.  He isn't allowed to enter the bathroom while I'm bathing.  It has an effect on us, and our sex life.  He cannot buy sexy underwear for me anymore, because he says that he never sees me without clothes anyway or we always have sex with the lights off.  Is there something wrong with me?  Am I somehow missing the bigger picture here?

Oh Gossssh! 

  

I 'm too going through just exactly the same! I have a 3 months old baby boy and my belly is messed up real baaaaaaad because of the Csection I had and the stretsh marks .....etc. I gained 60 Ibs in my pregnancy and I was initially about 20 Ibs Overweight...I wasn't looking bad at all before pregnancy in fact I was so pretty as everyone was saying about me.now I look like a huge whale with scarres on the belly and hair allover...go figure what my hubby would feel like now! 

well he says that he loves me and that he understands why I look like that now...blah blah..but whenever we go out and one of those blonde skinny tight jeans pass by him he almost drewls on her and stair as if he didn't see a female before,we don't have sex at all after a lengthy hot relationship for over than 4 years....he makes comments about my weight and I know he hates me being so fat. once I turn my back to him he looks at me with disgust because of all the fat I carry on my back...I'm not stupid ..let him say whatever..I know he hates fat women... 

  

that's the only difference between you and me! you have a loving boyfriend.I have a selfish hubby otherwise everything else is quite the same! 

 
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October 4, 2005, 8:21 pm CDT

LOLOLOLOL

Quote From: mbeth6565

I've seen this young woman on another show..don't know what it was. She's nuts. Over the top about her height. Dr. Phil was right, she needs to accept herself.

  

Oh Melissaaa! 

  

So you're so upset that Dr. Phil is rewarding ex-overweight people.!!!!!! 

I just don't beleive you're on National TV for that reason and that you went through his studio wardrobe to prove they don't carry Size 0 (Zero) which is your size ??!!!! 

  

So what he doesn't carry size Zero, well he didn't hire any ghosts before.!!!! 

  

you really made overweight audience mad today! 

  

 
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October 5, 2005, 6:41 pm CDT

So What's your point still ?

Quote From: msmelissa

This is that Melissa that everyone is so upset with. For the record I didn't go on the show for pitty, or to complain. I went on the show to create awareness as a petite and short person. Yes, it's difficult to find clothing, and people say tastless rude comments about my height that they would never dream of saying to an overweight person. It was supposed to be a comparasin not an attack. As hurt as you as an overweight person about my partial comments is as hurt as I am when people say short jokes. The broad statement that overwight people can lose weight was never intended for any one with a medical condition. 

I think people that maintain their weight, healthy eating habits and exercise are not rewarded on a regular basis. More power to anyone who loses weight and is healthy. 

There is now beautiful plus size models in high fashion magazines and on the runway. Will the industry change and have shorter models to do the same, maybe. Its my dream and goal, and because of my height of which I have no control over I can't have it. There is a big market for shorter women as is plus size and I want to open the market. I have been blessed with many gifts,health and a great life. Everyone in life has an opinion and their story and this one is mine.  

SO?? 

  

I as well as many others I'm sure still don't get why are you so upset about rewarding "ex-fat" people. 

If life was like that ..good eating habits..exercise..blah blah...and then you push the barbie button and call yourself Britney. then everone out there will be skinny !! 

you have to understand that there is more of medical, chemical and mental issues associated with weight gain. and when you say to overweight people "STOP EATING" you're simply telling them in a polite way what sounds more like "go have a heart attack"....or "go kill yourself"...!!!!!! 

  

So why were you on the show? that's the point that I don't get. 

 
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October 6, 2005, 11:40 pm CDT

YOU JUST GOT IT RIGHT!

Quote From: danerslv

Melissa was killing me on the show today. I personally think she wanted people to feel sorry for her. There was no point in picking on people who have weight issues. She just sounded mean. I also think she wanted her TV appearance to boast her modeling career. Like someone from an agency would see her and feel sorry for her and call her. PLEASE! She is beautiful on the outside but ugly on the inside. I hope when she watches the show she realizes how she sounded and how her facial expressions looked to everyone else. 

  

I actually have a few things in common with Melissa, I totally understand being short....I am 4'11, 95lbs, a size 0 and I too do some modeling. But I don't have the same out look she does. I'm short big whoop. I have been on the cover of a Playboy Special Edition and in four other magazines for them, I have done a few national commercials and TV shows. BIG DEAL THAT I CAN DO RUNWAY! You don't see someone who is 6'0 tall complaining that they can't be a gymnast or a jockey!  

  

P.S. My fiance is 6'3! 

Yup! 

Finally someone got the real scenario right ! 

At least if no modelling agencies will offer something then perhaps a marketing agency will..! 

  

Know what I mean?? 

 
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October 7, 2005, 12:00 am CDT

pointless Melissa !!

Quote From: cofcgal

 WHOA!!  Some major  "backpeddlin" is going on here. 

Did you not go on national TV to say how overweight people can just lose weight , and why oh why is Dr. Phil rewarding them?  I think that point was very clear, although misinformed and ignorant.  All I took away from seeing you was an attitude of " poor me I'll never get to fulfill my dream of being a runway model."

What I  honestly cannot figure out is why Dr. Phil bothered to put you on a show at all-didn't find your "issue" the least bit interesting or worthy of attention.  I have to agree with Cambrie- I think you just wanted whatever perks or goodies were available, but most of all, you wanted exposure to further your career., which you eluded to in your post.

"To create awareness as a petite and short person"-hmmmm, you have too much time on your hands and unfortunately, are not grateful for all the blessings life has given you.  How sad.

Yup! you got the whole thing right the poor short girl just wanted to : 

"To create awareness as a petite and short person". 

Awarness about what? 

-That Short people exist? 

-Or short people can't do runways? 

- Or fat people are bad and don't deserve a reward? 

-Dr. Phil is spoilling ex-obese people by reawrdind them? 

 

I like your "expression" though. "create awarness"!! 

 

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