I know my husband and I are good parents to our 13 and 10-yr old boys and 7 yr old princess simply because we love them so much it hurts and continually question ourselves to search for and hopefully correct the flaws we see. And there are some aspects to our parenting that I wouldn't change for the world, like: not being afraid to apologize when we screw up (a hard thing for kids is realizing mom & dad ain't perfect anymore) and not being afraid to show simple affection and say "I love you" too much. But here's what does worry me: my husband's style can be and has been classified as authoritarian - i.e. he's a drill seargant. Hence, I am very easily persuaded to be the permissive parent, I guess to try and compensate for where I feel my husband is failing or lacking. However, I know this is most definitely what NOT to do, so I'm trying to be on top of that. The goals I've set and am working on involve doing everything I can to ensure non-stop communication to avoid our children being disciplined twice, for example and making the consequences for their behavior, positive or negative constant. The hardest, in my opinion is consistently rewarding the positive because, especially with three kids it's so easy to get into the rut of "Don't", "No" and "Why did you...?". My poor darlings have missed more weekly allowances than I can count! I'm glad their not me. If I'd not been paid once for my job, I'd have given notice...
Hello. I'm 17 and female. I've been with my boyfriend for over 5 months now. I love him So much and i know he loves me. I know everyone will think its weird and crazy, but we are crazy about eachother and have already talked about and discussed our futures together. We want to be with each other for the rest of our lives, we both know that. We need eachother. We talk about everything, we never fight, and we're Perfect for eachother. We've talked about sex, and decided that we have to wait at least a year. We both want it already but know we should wait. Everyone has different opinions on this issue and it really differs between people, but i was wondering what everyone else thought was the "appropriate" age? Is 18 too young? Several peope my age are no longer virgins, but that doesnt mean it's right. What do you think?
Thankyou
Like you, I was 17 when I gave my virginity to a boy I'd cared about for a long time (more than three years). Aside from that, I'm probably as far from like you as the sun and the moon! But in my opinion there's one thing that remains constant in all women: our virginity, that simple physiological piece of tissue representing our God-given virtue can only be given away once. ONCE. It can't be taken back. It won't grow back.
Right now, you and your boyfriend are riding that wonderful and insane hormone roller coaster and so your relationship does feel perfect.
But, for the sake of argument, let's just say he isn't the one for you and at age twenty or twenty-three (or whatever) you meet the one who is.
Which one would you rather give that gift of your virginity to? (And trust me, there's no real heavy difference between 17, 27 or 37! Just ask my gorgeous baby sisters, ages 18 and 33 - both still happy virgins and relieved that they have that something special to give.)
So, in my long and annoyingly complicated answer, here's my ultimate comment: What is the "appropriate age" for sex? Easy. It's the same answer to how old you'll be when you marry the man of your dreams.
All of the children over the years I dealt with, who were disciplined by spanking behaved
like the people's above. I found it made permanent wild children. The parents would criticize
others for having better sense while theirs became meaner and they would blame their behavior
on treating them to well, to protect violence's reputation. So I don't assume children are treated
nonviolently if they misbehave.
Are you kidding me? All three of my children were spanked - not every time they did something wrong - but every time they took an action that could hurt themself, someone or something else, or deliberately hurt someone else. They are now 13, 10 and 7 years of age.
Where are they now?
My 13 year old son is a normal young teen who struggles with schoolwork and sometimes with friends, but is in now way "wild" - permanently or otherwise. As a matter of fact, he has responsibilities at home that include being the babysitter for us for his brother and sister when needed.
Neither are my other son and 7-yr old daughter - how did you say? "permanent wild children". They are loving, affectionate and extremely self-confident and intelligent.
And by the way, they NEVER throw tantrums, publicly or privately, they respect authority (even use "Sir" and "Ma'am" like pros) without fearing it, and willingly accept responsibilities and consequences for their behavior.
Yes, I "went there"...and if I had to do it all over? I'd pop their little butts again!
I know my husband and I are good parents to our 13 and 10-yr old boys and 7 yr old princess simply because we love them so much it hurts and continually question ourselves to search for and hopefully correct the flaws we see. And there are some aspects to our parenting that I wouldn't change for the world, like: not being afraid to apologize when we screw up (a hard thing for kids is realizing mom & dad ain't perfect anymore) and not being afraid to show simple affection and say "I love you" too much. But here's what does worry me: my husband's style can be and has been classified as authoritarian - i.e. he's a drill seargant. Hence, I am very easily persuaded to be the permissive parent, I guess to try and compensate for where I feel my husband is failing or lacking. However, I know this is most definitely what NOT to do, so I'm trying to be on top of that. The goals I've set and am working on involve doing everything I can to ensure non-stop communication to avoid our children being disciplined twice, for example and making the consequences for their behavior, positive or negative constant. The hardest, in my opinion is consistently rewarding the positive because, especially with three kids it's so easy to get into the rut of "Don't", "No" and "Why did you...?". My poor darlings have missed more weekly allowances than I can count! I'm glad their not me. If I'd not been paid once for my job, I'd have given notice... 