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November 2, 2005, 7:15 pm PST
Troubled Teens
Quote From: klopuskiI have a 16 year old daughter. For the past year we have had problems with cutting, smoking, depression and a general lack of self esteem. She crys that she doesn't have any friends and the "friends" that come around all seem to be boys. Last week one of the "friends" overdosed on drugs. He will recover however it has sent her into a tail spin. Her one girlfriend has also stopped calling her. We have cofronted her about drugs. She says she would never do them. But we also confronted her about smoking and she lied. I have taken her to a medical doctor and to therapists. She is not willing to talk with anyone. I don't know what to do. I need some help. its not uncommon for kids to not be able to find friends at school. when i was in public school i was mature for my age, and the lack of maturity from my peers made it hard to connect with anyone. i had a few people that i hung out with, but they werent really friends, more like aquantiences. right now if your daughter doesnt have any friends she will be getting that attention from boys. it would be different if she simply got along with guys better, but if shes having sex with them then things will get complicated.
while therapists do good work, i dont blame your daughter for not wanting to talk to them. i gaurantee your daughter knows that you want whats best for her but she is probably thinking that these people dont care, they dont know her, and they arent family. the best advice i can give is to talk to your daughter every day, get to know her, get to know whats going on in her head. you cant expect her to sit down and talk with a therapist until she feels comfortable talking to her mother first.
good luck, i hope you and your daughter see happier days soon.
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