Messages By: lpewagoner

I have not ever heard of that book. I am sure it is great, but take it from a real mother. There isnt a book in the world that will give you any advice that is worth a darn..... 

And my real advice.....Do not take in everything you read....No book will be able to teach you anything about being a mom. Not even the ones from real moms.  

I understand how frustrating it can be to work with the schools. Kids don't seem to get quality care anymore. That was why they went back to re-establish the ( NCLB) "No Child Left Behind Act," that was enacted in the 70's. However, the teachers are protesting because it would require them to higher their degrees and get masters in their subjects that they teach. I worked as a Title I Aid, Which implements the NCLB and if the program is run right it is an awesome program because it gets everyone involved in working with the child in the program and they work on both ends of the spectrum. It gets the teacher involved, one on one tutoring and from there the Title I Aide speaks to the parents about what they have discovered and helps them work with the child as well.  

As a Title I Aide I knew that when working with a child that is having any kind of problem the first thing you do is test them to see where they are at in the subject they are having a problem with. This will tell you what grade level they are working at, exactly what there struggles are and you can help them from there. Usually, for the self-esteem issue, you start at a level below what they tested at. You don't want to start at a level above or even the level they are at because obviously they are going to struggle with that so you give them something you know they can do that will boost their confidence and move up gradually from their. Or even if it is too easy you can tell the child their moving ahead and that alone boosts their self confidence. 

This is how they should been or should have been working with your daughter all along. Most children do not know how to read when they first start out in school. If they can it is usually simple words like, I ,and, the, do it etc.. But developmentally most children are not ready to read. Reading is what I worked on with the kindergarten and 1st graders. I did just what you described they did with your daughter and I pulled them out in a small group or individually and worked with them. 

It is a good idea to talk to her teacher and see if she will work with you in helping her to have better study habits and find a way a study that works for her. Sometimes making a game out of it helps. Also they have books at most teachers stores that are called "Bridging from grade to grade" I do believe that they have them for Junior High and High School as well and it eases the child into the next grade. Also try to get her to do as much hands on stuff as well. That might help her study. Maybe she needs to visualize what she is learning. Like I said before you will find it will help a great deal if you find a way that best suits her for studying.  

I wish I were there and could help you. Or at least educate you on how you can help your daughter. Make sure you ask a lot of questions at conferences to get as much information as you can. Especially on the material they are learning and will be learning through the course of that class. That way you stay a step ahead if you need to. I am assuming that your daughter is in High School since mine is. If she has different classes through out the day then do this with each class. Most classes hand out a syllabus at the beginning of the course and it tells you what they will be learning and when. 

Yes, I agree if you can give you daughter a sense of belonging it could go a long way. But, also remember that at this age they are trying more than ever to figure out where they fit at in the world, how they contribute to the World, and how to manipulate it to their advantage. This is all normal. So as you said if you guys have a Family Movie Night and everyone is there it will help with bonding the family. As for husband he may just need to learn from experience how to work with kids and it wouldn't be inappropriate to explain to your kids that he has never had kids and therefore needs to learn how to interact with them and in time he will do that. 

If you go to the message board screen and click on mental health there is a board called bipolar. 

You may get a lot more answers to your questions on that board than any other. 

Also you might want to try 

www.nami.org 

http://www.patientcenters.com/bipolar/news/resources.html 

http://www.mental-health-today.com/bp/family_section.htm 

http://www.dbsa.org/ 

These are all helpful bipolar websites that I have come across. 

The key to success would be med compliance and usually some type of talk therapy to work on coping skills.  There are also wonderful books you can read.  

The one that might help both of you is 

The Bipolar Disorder Survival Guide   and  

Bipolar for Dummies. 

I have both these books as well as some others and find them very helpful in pinpointing symptoms and how to deal with the ups and downs. 

If you have any other questions please feel free to email me at 

mommaoof2@yahoo.com 

A little about myself.... I am a mother of a daughter (15 next week) who has bipolar disorder 2. She has been dx since 2003 and has just gone through a course of unstability. She has been hospitalized 4 times sice 2003 and in many intensive type therapy programs. She is currently seeing a psychologist for therapy 1-2 times a week and also a psychiatrist once a month for medication monitoring. 

Good luck 

Tammy 

. 

Hi, 

What medication has helped you sleep?  I have tried, (I think) everything. 

There is nothing shameful about bipolarity.  When I was first diagnosed, I felt as tho I had a huge 

ugly wart on my face that said "screwed up"!!  Yeah, talking about it (I don't mean obsessively), 

helps.  They say when you let something out into the light (not keep it inside), it has a better 

chance of healing.  Makes the whole thing so much worse...keeping it a secret. 

It is like telling someone you have diabetes....just a genetic thing.  You didn't go do something horrible to get it....nothing to be ashamed of...nothing at all.  Think of it as something that makes 

you special..   

PS....After being diagnosed with it, I have thought a lot about "normal"...I am not so sure that normal 

is even a word that should be allowed to exist!!   What is "normal".  ?  Cannot think of one single 

thing....people do not come standardized.  This just makes you more "interesting"...think of it like that, instead.  Shame, all by itself, is wretched to suffer...let that, at least, go.  Name one single 

"normal" person.  Just try it !!! 

In regards to the sleep aids.. LUNESTA was my favorite. but medicade does not cover this medication. So I take TEMAZEPAM 15 mg.. I take it and about 2 to 3 hours later I am ready for sleep. it helps me to at least sleep. literally there were DAYS I would not sleep.  

         I have to reply to NORMAL also.. I have taken meds now that have come close to what others may call a normal person. but I was like a zombie almost. and if that was normal. I don't want it. I lost that "out there person" I am fun, giddy, and feeling. I state things as I see them usually. and have found that with some of the medication I was perscribed it took the inner most me ... away...  

I stated to a normal. meaning. not so down, that I just waste days away. I want to be able to hold a job. to leave my home. to handle a productive life. but I have found I will go day by day by day..sometimes sitting in the same place. just exisisting.. and that is very hard for me to handle.. I want that type of normal.. that I would be a productive lady on this earth..  There were insodinces in my life. that overwhelmed me, and I snapped. and haven't gotten back on track since.  

But can I name one person Normal.. DR> PHIL and ROBIN<, closest to normal I can say.. even against all odds, they have made something of themselves. THey can laugh at themselves. they can handle the kids moving away. they have goals. they believe in each other. Maybe I put them on a pedistal. but I try not to.. It is just feeling proud of them, the hope they give to others.. that it can be done. Love the honesty they put out..