Quote From: cmdirksI have three young children, aged 6 and younger. I don't know what it may be like with having a teenager yet. Maybe it will get harder as they get older. But for now? It is the easiest thing for me to tell them no. Of course, they want every toy they see and we all know that's impractical. We all say no to the young'uns. But even with saying "Hey, we want McDonald's tonight," we still have to say no sometimes. Even though they are so young, I still have a very simple explanation. We can't afford to spend the money right now. Daddy works and gets paid to work. He only gets so much. Right now we have to pay the phone bill and the light bill and we can't spend $30 on fast food tonight. They may not fully understand all the ins and outs of it, but they accept it. What we hope is that they continue to accept this as they grow.
And feeling guilty for it helps no one. I guess I just don't understand the mind frame of someone who would feel guilty for not spoiling their kids and so they DO spoil them. Maybe that was one of the things I learned from my parents. They did not teach me ONE THING about money growing up, but they sure did teach me that saying no is a part of life.
If nothing else, I do hope these families learn that much. Saying no is so easy.
I so totally agree! I'm so sick of these clueless parents whining about how their kids are "so spoiled"...well how do you think they got that way??
I raised three kids all alone, with NO child support, and worked three jobs at a time to put a roof over their heads, food in their bellies and clothes on their backs. The way I figured it, they were lucky to get that.
We had nice Christmases, they had wonderful birthdays, and there were a few extras along the way, but they learned early that there would be no spoiling. If they wanted extra money, they worked for it. My son (who now owns his own successful contracting business) started working at age 9 shoveling snow, raking leaves, mowing lawns, and at age 14 he lied about his age to get a job washing dishes in a neighborhood Chinese restaurant. My two girls babysat for extra money, and got jobs as soon as they were able.
It didn't hurt them one bit to work for what they wanted! In fact, I truly believe that the greatest gift you can give your children is the gift of independence.....teaching them how money works and that the world does NOT owe them a living, gives them that gift.
By the way, the absolute best Christmas we ever had was the year that we all made each other's gifts...no store bought gifts were allowed. It taught them so many lessons....and that was the purpose.
At the time, they were all in elementary and high school. My son made me a beautiful coffee table in woodshop, my oldest daughter made me a gorgeous cutting board, also in woodshop, and my youngest daughter made a batik window cover in art class that I use every year at Christmas...and I still have and use all of those things. I made their gifts as well...and everyone loved everything.
A little more dose of reality, parents, and a WHOLE LOT less spoiling.....before you turn your children out into the world where the rest of us have to deal with them. Please. Do us all a favor...especially them.
