I have a 21 year old step daughter that has disrupted our family in so many ways. It all began this past summer. She still lives with us and I have a 14 yr old daughter that I am trying to raise with better judgment. My husband and I married when she was 15 so she was pretty much already set in her way of how things go. She had an abortion at 14 and another one when she was 20. She was arrested this past summer for possession and intent to distribute (cocaine). Of course my husband bailed her out of jail. She continues to use drugs, I know this because I found pot in my car after allowing her to use it... for the last time. I confronted her and my husband at the same time, still my husband just let it go. He is so afraid she is going to move out that he will not enforce any rules with her, even the ones he put forth as a condition when he bailed her out of jail. My husband gets defensive about anything I say accuses me of "Picking on her". I have tried to get him to see what her actions are doing to our marriage but he says my actions or reactions to her behavior is what's destroying our marriage. I have gotten to the point now that I say nothing and feel as if our marriage doesn't mean very much to him. I agree we stand behind our children but there comes a time when they have to answer to their actions. We are still waiting for a court date for her arrest, we are not sure what to expect.
Do I keep my mouth shut while knowing that she is doing a lot of things that are illegal, immoral and inappropriate? HELP DR. PHIL
