I am the mother of two boys ages 5 and 10. My ten year old has ADHD and is very successfully treated with his medication. He has been on maintenance for more than 2 years and does wonderfully. His personality is still in tact, he does not "zone out" and he is extremely intelligent.
My husband and I have been married for 4 1/2 years. He is stepfather to both of my children. He loves them very much and tries to do everything that he can to let them know that he loves them and wants what's best for them.
The problem in this situation arises because of my parenting style. I do not get on the boys, particularly the 10 year old, as much as I should for being disrespectful of me. He does not follow my directions and almost always has something to say after I speak to him or after I have told him to do something. For many years, I just did not realize that he was doing that, largely because of the verbally abusive relationship I was in with his father. I was desensitized what he was saying to me. Now, I realize that he does it, but I feel that if I reprimand him every single time he does it, all I will ever do is reprimand my child.
My husband is disgusted with the entire situation, to the point that he had threatened to leave because of the way that I allow my child to speak and act toward me. I realize that I am not doing what I should, but I don't know what to do without feeling as if I am reprimanding my child every one of the precious moments that we have to spend together after working and schooling all day.
Does anyone have any suggestions?
