Quote From: abbydabbyI guess you have it all figured out. you're right, every parent has their child's college education paid for before they bring them into this world. and you know what my expenses are and that i need to bring home 6 figures. You have no idea what i make, what my expenses are, you are just rambling bs in my opinion. I have 4 children and do you think i will ever be able to afford to put all of them through 4 years of college? Does that mean i should not have had them? This view is EXACTLY what makes me so angry. I have seen my friends put through college w/ their parents hard earned money, and what do they do w? their free ride? they have so much time on their hands as young adults, they party it up and end up doing so poorly in school, they drop out, fail, go for an extra year, on costing their parents, not them!
Our society is raising lazy children, yup, i said it! We are "expected" to do everything for our children. What about teaching them responsibility? Making them work for what they want? Instead we give hand outs and they are taught to expect things handed to them. Children moving back home after college, to park it and live rent free for years. that is so lazy, and in my opinion, bad parenting. We need to stop imposing these wacky modern views on our children. why do you think so many things are giong down hill? Marriage is a joke today. Divorce rate is up, adultry is so high it makes you feel like you can't trust anyone. I made a statement about women waiting to, in my opinion, an older age to start their family an i get replies back defended their age, etc. You are so busy hearing "35 is too old".....that all you see is red. Never mind the fact that I was defending a very rude, arragent person that felt i was "dumb" for marrying young and could not afford to raise my own kids...of let's not forget "she is a better mom because she experienced life and traveled......"
It"s only an opinion. You think i don't get criticied for having kids young? you think i don't get questioned the very same i did on this board about "kids are expensive......" I find women in their 30's to be MUCH more aggressive and very quick to shun me and women like me because they think they have made it financially or havea degree hangingover their head. I guess THEY are all set to have kids now. All the money and traveling in the world will not prepare you to be a good mother.
And as far as marriage goes.......in our modern society, people wait to get married until they are in their 30's. I guess they want to see whats out there, they have their career, they supporrt themselves. All that just makes marriage less and less important. Why get married when you have supported yourself for 15 years? You don't need a man! (I'm being sarcastic) But this is how alot of people feel. they have been on their own so long they don'teven know how to co-exist w/ someone. And news flash...marriage takes WORK...no one is perfect, you are not prefect and your mate is not prefect. You will run into problems, you work them out! This is society once again being lazy. It is easier to just run away from it all then to actually help the problem. Children suffer in the end. you say is it better to raise your child in a home w/ arguing/fighting, etc...of course not, that's when you GROW up and don't do that in front of your kids!!!! Have some self control and work on the problems when they are asleep or not around. If you felt love for someone to get married to in the first place and have kids w/, you can make it work. But the excuses will just pour in cause of laziness!
I know i am a minority here i guess. But I think our ultra modern, career and money hungry society absolutley stinks. When you are old and grown do you want to leave this place knowing you made 6 figures and drove a nice car....or that you focused on family, love, and being a decent person and have priceless memories of being part of a loving family? Anyone who isso wrappedup in bringing home the big bucks is missing out on what life is all about.
If your heart is in the right place, everything will fall into place. You will see you can be just as wealthy as all the money hungry people out there, and it just WON'T be the focal point of your life.
I think that you are right. Kids today, even people my age (23) are expecting everything handed to them. Most of them have never had a steady job and still live at home with mom and dad and expect them to pay for everything. If something goes wrong they blame mom and dad for not being ready for them. I find this rude, arrogant, and embarrassing. I have always worked for what I wanted, that is how I was raised. If I didn't get something, it was my own fault, not anyone else's. I moved out of my paren't house right after graduation, I had a very good job and I was engaged to my husband. We worked for everything we had, we asked for no money, and we decided to have children. One of our reasons for having children so young was so that we could keep up with them. lol And maybe they would be out of the house by the time we turned 40 and then we would have the rest of our lives to do what we want, travel. We do not have money put away for them for college, my husband and I did not go to college, and he makes 35,000 a year and is training to be zone manager of a fortune 50 company. Now, if we did go to college, we would have tons of loans and we wouldn't be where we are financialy right now. If our children want to go to college then they need to help with that, just like my husband and I would have if we went. My point is, we as parents need to teach our kids that life is not easy and that they will not get everything they want. They work for what they want. That teaches independence and respect. And really, who is ever financially ready for children?
