Messages By: emuposs

Hi all,  

Im a lady in Australia currently suffering from Vestibular Neuronitis.  I have been off work since feb 2004.  I have manage to get back to work in August 2005 but now Im back with issues of ill health and viability of continueing work.   

Vestibular Neuronitis is where you have constant vertigo.  You move slower to minimise the spinning, sometimes you fall over, you sometimes have brain fog and unable to think quickly.  All though we look normal our inside world is a spinning mess!!!   Its not something you die from but it does disrupt our lives.  Im worried I will get the sack from too many miss days at work.  Its hard to go catch the bus when your world is spinning and you feel like your drunk 24/7.  I should state I don't drink alcohol and I don't take drugs.   There is not much the doctors can do for it and apparently your own body gets used to it or something.   

I had a friend who loved being in hospital gaining attention and doing stupid things to get herself in hospital.   Thankfully she has stopped this, but I think it stems from something missing in her own life that she feels/felt the need to do it.   

Im just here to let you know that going through a chronic illness and that from the outsider we all look normal.  Doesn't mean something is not happening.    

My spinning life is hell.   Work, income, friends, family are all an issue.   

Take Care 

Blessed Be 

Emuposs.  

I just brought the book at midday (aussietime) today.  Im hopeful that this book will be the turning point in my life.   

I have met many men and the ones I like don't like me and the ones that like me I don't like them.  Go Figure!! 

I met a man recently that I thought was husband material....but my issue was his enormous weight.  Im not a skinny lady roughly 180 pounds.  Im sorry Im from australia this is an estimation of pounds.  I couldnt get past his enormous weight and the fact it was that bad it was a health issue.  But then I found out he liked to go drinking with his mates.  Drinking bourbon and coke till 7am in the morning!!!!!  Woah light bulb went off!!!!  And I thought NO WAY....Im not getting involved with a drinker.  

I also can't help thinking my weight has kept others that I like away.  But being ill there is not much I can do about that at the moment.  

I have had 4 boyfriends all 5 yrs apart and all weren't overly concerned with my weight in fact the last one loved my awful butt.   My butt has major cellulite something that is genetic from my mother.  I did gymnastics for 14 yrs and even then once I was a teenager I had cellulite.  But my last boyfriend/partner loved it!!  I thought he was either blind or mentally challenged.   

But in todays skinny driven society Im up against what society says is beautiful.  Its time men realised that the female of the species comes in all shapes and sizes.  Some tall, skinny and other short and skinny..  Tall and voluptous, and short and voluptous.  Voluptous means to me more than just size 12, infact size 14-18 is voluptous to me.   I know the sizing in Australia is different from the US.  Sorry.   

I hope this book gives me some help.  In my life I havent been on many dates.  Im not sure.  My main goal at the moment is if I see a man I like in a store or at a sporting event or a park to smile at them.  Its my first baby step.....I might move on to saying hi later.  

I'll keep in touch as I read the book. 

Take Care 

Blessed Be 

Emuposs.  

ps...emuposs.  is an almagamation of  the animals Emu and Possum.