Messages By: lovingone

Quote From: blueangel777

YOU SAID IT, "HAPPY YOUNG PEOPLE." 

  

YOU ARE MARRIED!!!   GET REAL!!! 

  

YOU DON'T HAVE A CLUE!!! 

   

TRY BEING 51, NEVER MARRIED, NO CHILDREN,  

GRADUATE DEGREE, NEVER DATED, NOT BLONDE, 

ETC, ETC, ETC. 

  

LIFE CAN BE HELL!!! 

  

BLUEANGEL777 

  

  

Quote From: krissyanne

  

  

On Part 1 of Love Smart the gal with the dark hair that had her finger in the food?!  Remember?  Well, I want to know more about the date she had.  He was very intriguing to me.  Who or how do you suggest I go about this whole process?  Love to just email with him.....  Not in ANY hurry - just learning how to go about being a better me and live the best life I can! 

  

  

Quote From: akavanessa

I keep reading about people not being able to make it work, being cheated on, being dumped...But I bet every single one of you has at least one person in your life who wants to be in a relationship with you. 

  

I guess I'm single and alone just because I don't want any of the guys I've gon out with recently. I mean, I get asked out all the time. There are like six guys calling me on a regular basis, and here I am, alone. Sleeping alone, staying up WAY too late and reading about how much it sucks to be alone. Pathetic, huh? 

  

I read comments from people saying things like "I'm by no means a super-model" or regretting having given their "all" to a relationship because maybe it had something to do with being cheated on. They wonder "what's wrong with me????". And what did I do wrong??? 

  

Well, I have to give a newsflash. I know everyone is going to hate me for what I'm about to say, but I'm just trying to illustrate my point. 

  

All those problems like not feeling loved, not feeling secure, being with men who are only interested in sex, cheaters, liars, people who are just not that into you, etc., etc., etc.,  

Yeah, we all know those. Well, they have to do with the one being the creep and not the one getting their feelings hurt. Here is how I know this. 

  

I am 25 years old. 

I basically am a "supermodel". I mean, my mom was a bikini model and although I've chosen to work on what's inside and get a real career, I do have my mom's supermodel looks. 

All that means is I get hit on all the time. Men who do't even know me will saying anything to try to hook up with me. I get hit on by people who have nothing in common with me and aren't even interested in anything I do or have to say but the lie in hopes of getting a chance to sleep with me. 

I get hit on at work constantly, other people are always talking about me behind my back. I can't go out to a club without a date because I get mobbed by a bunch of drunk guys. There are many people in the world who will assume that a sexy girl is also dumb. People who have never even met me will talk to me like a child. 

  

All I'm saying is, being young and being gorgeous is not going to make your love life any better or any less painful. All it means is you have more creeps to sift through, and more guys have more motivation to lie to try to get in your pants. 

  

I recently had my heart broken. I fell completely in love with this guy who ended up confessing to me that he had a girlfriend, and that he is sorry and he knew it was wrong to lie o me but he "just couldn't NOT be with a woman like me if he had the chance". Of course I dumped him. But what really hurt was he took me all over town, he introduced me to EVERYONE, he made a huge deal of being all romantic and affectionate and holding me and protecting me from other guys and everything. Now if this wasn't just about how I look and how much he wanted to sleep with me, then he wouldn't have showed me off and made so much effort. The part that really hurts is that I thought he was doing that because he really liked me and wanted a relationship with me. But no, he liked that he had this gorgeous girlfriend on the side.  

  

If it's true love you're looking for, looks have NOTHING to do with it. It just gives people something to use you for. And it gets you alot more than your fair share of stalkers. 

  

P.S. I know I mentioned that I get hit on at work all the time and that people gossip about me. So you might wonder what I wear to work. Here it is: Dark navy blue button down with badge and Paramedic county patches, company issue trousers and combat boots. It's not like I flirt or have a sexy job or wear sexy clothes. That's all I'm saying.  

  

I know how bitter I sound. But I want to find true love. How do you know if a guy really even sees you or cares about you or respects you if tons of guys are acting like they do just to see if they can get you into bed? 

  

Thanks for bearing with me. I probably sound like a complete brat. I guess I'm just so tired of being alone, and yet never being left alone. 

  

ANyone have an opinion on his? SImilar experience? 

Quote From: jim1970

Being single BLOWS.  It means you are lonely, your sex life is erratic and there is no constant.  Marriage is completely the opposite-if you do it the old-fashioned way.

Quote From: juliette28

Hello! My name is Judy. I am 31 yrs old. I am still single. I am from Calgary, Alberta, Canada. I am fairly new to calgary. I have lived here about 6 months and I dont have any single friends to go out and do stuff with. I have tried speed dating and online dating and I have had no luck finding my true love. I was wondering if there is any single woman  that would be interested getting together for movies and other stuff. I hope to hear from you soon. My email is: jlomayer@shaw.ca 

Judy 

Quote From: jelle_elle

I am an intelligent 31 y/o single mother of 2, I work full-time, go to college full-time and am soley responsible for my 2 sons (6,11).  My problem is with my ex. About a year ago we started seeing each other again after a 2 year separation. But early into our new venture he tells me that he is "confused about what he wants in his life". Mind you this never stopped him from telling me that he loved me or that he only wanted to be with me, but just couldn't give me a relationship or commitment.  So I MADE excuses for him and decided to give us time, afterall we couldn't just fall back into a serious relationship... Then after all of this I discovered that he was seeing me and several other women whom all thought that he was only with them and he was telling them that he loved them too. I was devestated.  And then he see sawed back and forth between me and another woman, finally choosing her. Again I was hurt and agnry and vowed to never speak to him again, but when that relationship failed (1 month later) he wanted to come back into my life, but not as a boyfriend, but just dating me...AGAIN I made excuses,  we can just take our time, all he needs is time, he really loves me and he'll realize it sooner than later. But like the setting of the sun, after some detective work, I found out that he was "dating" a whole new batch of women. I have to tell you without sounding like a complete idiot I saw the signs, and I was expecting it, but without proof I didn't want to belive it.  Again I listented to his exucess that he was still confused and that old habits are hard to break. That he knows that he wants to be a family again, but he is having a hard time changing his ways. Now he is proffessing that he is a changed man and I just don't believe it...I find holes in his lies every which way I turn, but he flipps it on me and makes me feel like I am overreacting. 

  

Any way my question is this, why is it so hard for me to give him the boot? Why after everything can't I let him go? I know in my heart he is not changed and at this very moment he lied to me about going out with his friends to a bar and I ran into these friends at the movies and now he conviently won't answer his phone. But I digress, after all the lies and deception what is my problem? I make excuses for him and try to play him up for my family. I make excuses like "I know that he really isn't this man" and "I know he loves me and one day he will wake up and realize it".  

  

Mostly I am frusterated with myself. WHen I finally get the courage to tell him to take a hike, my fear of being alone creeps in and I am stuck. Will anyone ever want me? Where will I ever meet anyone. I am so jealous of him and her (whoever she is) that he has someone while I am sitting alone at home with his children... 

  

How do I do this? How do I stop excuseing this behavior from myslef and him and get on with my life and throw away the fear? 

  

Quote From: singer7

Ok, TOBS..............I haven't heard much on here in a while and I'm home on a Sat night! (sigh) I had somewhere to go but just didn't feel like going anywhere tonight. ......so I stayed in. 

I just have a question for my TOBS!  

Let me set this up! 

I voluteered this year to learn Christmas music, attend rehearsals, and sing in 11 services (4 on Christmas Eve) because I love to sing, wanted to be of service at Christmas time and give back to God for the talent he gave me!  I'll be reeping what I sew right? Rewards are coming???  

Sure! 

I come home to my apt exhausted after 11 services and crash in my bed about 10pm.  About 2:30 a.m.................................I hear female sex noises loud and clear and they wake me up out of a dead sleep!@!%$#   

I remember thinking...................."Come ON!!! Just get IT over with!!! For the love of God finish! I can't even remember how to spell sex............and she's hitting high Gs up above me. I sing in 11 services.............. and this is what I get???? 

Remember I'm being sarcastic w/all that I say................trying to make a joke out of it! 

But really, does this happen to any other TOBS out there??? Do you have to listen to others getting busy while you lay awake wishing you could fit tube socks in your ears? They wake me up regularly at random hours! They woke me up this morning. I even know he goes to the bathroom right afterwards............... I know that's when peace is restored!  

Any suggestions? 

  

Quote From: kluca1006

Michelle needs to grow up and get on with life.  Dr. Phil may not know any wives who would put up with this situation, but I do.   M E !!!   Dr. Phil is dead wrong.  My husband has a number of female friends.  He has taken them riding on his motorcycle, left the house on the weekend to go help them with car trouble, asked me to make them a cake or pie for their birthday or when they were upset, met them when he was staying in Daytona for bike events, etc.  I have met some of them, but am only friends with one.  They have come to our home when I was at work.  It doesn't bother me at all.  I have men who I work with that my husband has never met.  They call me after work and on weekends to talk about work, etc..  He would never answer my cell phone and I don't answer his.  I trust him to tell me if there is something going on that I need to know about.  He trusts me to tell him.  He tells me if they come by the house, so I don't hear about it from the neighbors, or if I do, I already know.  It is all about trust.  Either you love your spouse and trust them or you don't.  It all sounds like a lot of insecurity to me.

Quote From: jojo80

Matthew and Michelle won't last.  I just hope MIchelle isn't one of those women who feels she has to get pregnant in order to hold on to a man.  I could tell how uncomfortable Matthew felt about being on the who; he's probably going to resent Michelle even more and turn to his lady friends.  Matthew said that he can't talk about some things with MIchelle.  I can relate to that. Black men have a tendency to date white women as an "In Your Face" to white men more than anything else.  I have six brothers and I listen to their conversations with their friends in order to get better insight into men, and they all agree that black men need to know that black women will be waiting in the wings when and if things don't work out with their encounters with white society.  That's why black men get so upset when they see black women involved with white men.   

  

Michelle should focus on finding a career and friends of her own.  Even if Matthew's lady friends do meet her, she'll probably still find reasons not to like them.  Matthew was honest with his wife;  he told her that he had female friends, so she really walked into the situation.  Trying to control her husband now will ultimately unlesh surpressed feelings regarding his experiences living in a very  white authoritative country.         

Quote From: cjsmart

"Furthermore, white men have had no problems picking up the slack by having  relationships with Asians, Latinas, and so forth" 

  

Thank you... I live in texas...and I've noticed a lot of white men dating black women lately. So if it's happening in a conservative state like this, it's allllll gooodd! It's all a matter of education, you figure out what biologically makes us white or black or olive or yellow, and you read what your bible says about race (the whole verse and not part of it), you start realizing that all the other "stuff" is things that we as society have added.