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May 10, 2007, 3:54 pm PDT

Afraid to Ask for What You Want Sexually?

Quote From: mandra4life

My problem goes deeper than this. I do tell him hes sexy and I do try to be sexy for him. I tell him alot more than he does me and it doesn't work. He's not shy about sex. He's had a lot of sex and hes good at it. We used to have sex every day for a couple months than it was twice a week then once a week, then it got worse and worse. One time when we tried to talk about it, he got an attitude and didn't want to talk about it. Also he's not sexual with me hardly at all. We dont cuddle ever... he never holds my hand. Also what I think is strange is that I have never seen him naked in the light. He wont let me. If we ever sex when it light in the room, which has only happened a couple times, he has his shirt on.

We talked about sex one time and I asked why he wasn't having sex with me. At the time I was taking a shower every other day. I dont sweat so I didn't feel the need to. He told me because I didn't take a shower every day.

What a jerk. I would have screamed at him. I am not telling you to though. I think there is another reason why he isn't having sex with you and he just doesn't want to say. If it really is about you not taking a shower every day then he has problems. Every other day is good enough unless you have been working out.

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moodymitzy

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May 10, 2007, 4:00 pm PDT

Gag me.

Quote From: rachelrei

I don't think you should talk about sex seriously or take it seriously. It will make him feel like he HAS to do it rather than he WANTS to do it. Try to make it fun and unpredictable.
My boyfriend was rather shy about sex when we first started dating. But I was more open about it and I feel like I opened him up. He knows he has sexual desires but was too shy to express it.
The way I did it was telling him how sexy HE is and how I like to please HIM. I know you want him to tell you how sexy you are but first, do you tell him that? I think if you satisfy the guy sexually and make him feel special, you will get the same treatment. And when he does try to please you, don't forget to tell him how good he is.
I try to be sexy all the time and he loves it. Now he is able to say nasty things to me and we have a fun sex life!

I think that you should be able to talk to him about sex. If he cares you then he will listen to your feelings and try to make you happy. Yes I know that goes both ways. I believe that everything should be equal in relationships except when it comes to sex. I think the guy should do more for the woman. The man needs to make his partner feel wanted and sexy, not the other way around. That doesn't mean never tell him how sexy he is and how much you want him. You should do that for your man but he should do it more for you.

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moodymitzy

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November 9, 2007, 1:36 pm PST

Get a Clue

Quote From: dreadheadart

I am so sick of whites asking black folk "what do I do to fight racism?" Come on people. Whites created race and racism. They are the racists in society. Racism is race predjedice plus power! Blacks don't have the power to be racist.

Since whites created it, it's whites who have to end it. They have to correct all the wrongs that have been done in the name of racism. Most whites don't even think it's a problem. I am white and I am married to a black man. I see on a daily basis the racism he has to deal with. It's endless!!!! When I confront whites about their racist behavior, they say they aren't racist. Take a look at where whites live, work, the friends they have, the lovers they have, etc. White, white, white. They don't want to be around Blacks. We have white flight going on in our neighborhood right now. It's happening every where!!

Whites need to get over themselves and get honest. The majority of whites are racist. Polls say it, studies say it, the census says it! You benefit from white privilege every day and to say you don't means you're lying! Get out there and correct this!

First of all you have no right saying that whites created racism. The muslims created the slave trade. Africans sold there own people into slavery. In my opinion blacks are more likely to be racist than whites. You do not hear white people calling themselves European American, so why do blacks call themselves African American? Also if a white person tries to get food stamps or welfare for whatever reason and the people behind the desk are black then the white person will get dirty looks and most likely will be helped last or not at all. This is coming from my personal experiene and from some close friends and family members. Most black people think that only they should get finacial help. How can you say that whites are privilaged? There are so many scholorships that help out every other race but white. Blacks and other races get away with a lot more than white people, because they throw the biggest fits. The reason why white people do not want to be around many black people is because most of them are trashy. I do not believe that to be a racist comment beacuse statisticly it is true. Black people are more likely to be on welfare,be in gangs, use drugs, speak unclearly, and so on. I am not racist I just don't like trashy people.That includes white trash. My own mother is white trash and I hate it. I do not think that there is any reason for anybosy to be that way. It is black people who need to get over themselves and stop throwing rasism at people and just live good lives. If they did not give white people a reason to be racist than things would be better for everyone.

Now about the N word. Black people use the word but throw a huge fit the moment a white person does. Black people also call whites things like cracker and vanilla head, and that is not considered racism.

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moodymitzy

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November 9, 2007, 1:49 pm PST

You are mostly right

Quote From: skropk1

I am 23 years old and a college student. I was watching the Dr. Phil show and decided to post on the message boards because one topic really hit home with me. I have read in the new several times about the school that was going to offer birth control to 11+ yearolds. When I was 14 years old I became sexually active and while I feel it wasnt the 'best' decision..."everone was doing it" and as a teenager as much as you dont want to be a follower you dont want to be an outcast either. As I got older I became more attuned to my body and love and sex and everything started to make sense! All of a sudden I shed the old thoughts that what I was doing was wrong and all of a sudden it was just another part of life- growing up, haha as a 14 yearold, like duh--- ;) Looking back I wish that there had been more available to me in the way of birth control and INFORMATION on where to receive such things. God- once I found my local planned parenthood location (took forever) I was saved- and giving all of my friends (who also needed sex ed help) the address. They give free birth control and testing and healthcare depending on the state in which you live. The fact is that although birthcontrol doesnt protect against stds, I wish someone had made it available to me. Abstinence based sex education dosent work. DOESNT WORK. By the time I was in 10th grade I knew NO one who was a virgin... so parents, get over your own insecurities and realize that girls were having babies at 12 years old since man was created and its time to be resopnsible for your children by making sure they respect themselves enough to know that they should try very hard not to ruin their lives by getting pregnant too early or getting stds... and instead of preaching abstinance (which is near impossible) teach them responsibility and share with them the resources available

I do think that parents and schools should teach abstinance but also say that if you are going to do this it is most important to use protection. I am so sick of parents not teaching their kids about sex when there are 11 year olds getting pregnant. I am 24 and am raising my sixteen year old sister who is a virgin and plans to stay that way for a while. I told her about sex and the possibility of getting STD's even while using condoms. I also made sure to tell her that almost all guys her age and even a little older have no clue what they are doing. They do not care about pleasing the girl, they only care about themselves. So that it really would be pointless to do it because it would suck. Why don't parents talk to their kids about this? She kknows that I know what I am talking about because I have been with so many men of all ages. That I am not proud of but it taught me a lot.

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moodymitzy

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November 9, 2007, 1:57 pm PST

11/09 Debate Dr. Phil and the Bishop

Quote From: blueiz71

Hate to tell you, but there's no white heratage month either. And to have an all white club, group, or anything else is considered racist. No all white colleges, no grants based on simply being white, no white student union or all white frat houses.....that's racist.

That is funny and true I am glad somebody finally said it. The other thing is you do not hear white people calling themselves European American. Only in this country are other races allowed to do that. You not hear black people in Europe calling themselves African European. Also I am sick of blacks using the N word and its ok, it is also ok for them to call white people cracker,saltines, or vanilla head, but when a white person uses the N word alll the blacks in America get pissed off.

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moodymitzy

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November 9, 2007, 2:02 pm PST

Finally

Quote From: daawesome1

I actually recieved this email awhile back and wanted to pass it along due to this show that was on today. I totally support Dog and think people should GET OFF HIS BACK!!!! I also feel that today Dr. Phil stage something that I never thought I would see him do. I don't blame Dog for not coming on the show simply because of how everything was portrayed on the show, and how the opion deck was stacked against him. In that arena his appolgy would of been mistaken and fallin on unreceptive ears rather than being excepted with sincerety of which he gave it. What ever happened to FREEDOM OF SPEECH especially in the privacy of your own home!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

How many are actually paying attention to this?

There are African Americans, Mexican Americans,
Asian Americans, Arab Americans, Native Americans, etc.

And then there are just Americans.
You pass me on the street and sneer in my direction.
You Call me "White boy," "Cracker," "Honkey,"
"Whitey," "Caveman" .. and that's OK.
But when I call you, N*****, Kike, Towel head, Sand-n*****,
camel Jockey, Beaner, Gook, or Chink ... you call me a racist.
You say that whites commit a lot of violence against you,
so why are the ghettos the most dangerous places to live?

You have the United Negro College Fund. You have Martin Luther King Day. You
have Black History Month. You have Cesar Chavez Day. You have Yom Hashoah
You have Ma'uled Al-Nabi You have the NAACP.
You have BET.

If we had WET (White Entertainment Television) .. we'd be racists.

If we had a White Pride Day .. you would call us racists.

If we had White History Month .. we'd be racists.

If we had any organization for only whites to "advance" OUR lives ..

we'd be racists.

We have a Hispanic Chamber of Commerce, a Black Chamber of Commerce, and
then we just have the plain Chamber of Commerce.

Wonder who pays for that?

If we had a college fund that only gave white students scholarships
... you know we'd be racists.

There are over 60 openly proclaimed

Black Colleges in the US , yet if there were "White colleges" ..
THAT would be a racist college.
In the Million Man March, you believed that you were marching for your race
and rights. If we marched for our race and rights,

you would call us racists.

You are proud to be black, brown, yellow and orange, and you're not afraid
to announce it. But when we announce our white pride ..

you call us racists.
You rob us, carjack us, and shoot at us. But, when a white police officer
shoots a black gang member or beats up a black drug-dealer running from the
law and posing a threat to society .. you call him a racist.

I am proud.

But, you call me a racist.
Why is it that only whites can be racists?
There is nothing improper about this statement it only speaks out the truth nothing but the truth!!!!!!

I am glad that someone is saying this besides me. I totally agree with you. Blacks like to claim racism all the time but it is them who make us this way. Why can't the blacks understand that Muslims started the slave trade and it was Africans selling their own people into slavery so they need to quit bitching about slavery. I am not white and I am not a racist I just hate trashy people.

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moodymitzy

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November 9, 2007, 2:12 pm PST

The problem is

Quote From: fuzzy3599

Well I personally think that is sick that children close to my daughters age is taking birth control. Where are the parents? Do they actually care and know what there kids are doing at such a young tender age? Giving kida that age birth control is taking there youth away. Parents who allow this should actually watch thier kids. They also need to be part of there lives and do good things with them instead of letting schools or doing it them selves give kids so young birth control. That is just wrong. supervise Your kids better so we can protect them better. it makes me sick to know babies that young losing there youth cuz they made a baby and now have to take care of it. BABIES MAKING BABIES IS WRONG DON'T TEACH THEM TO BE LIKE THAT. TEACH THEM MARLES AND VALUES AND WE WONT HAVE THIS PROBLEM .

That most parents don't watch or even talk to their kids. That is why 11 year olds are getting pregnant. It is wrong and it is a shame that their youth is being taken away. Kids that age that are doing stuff like that are most likely not feeling loved and accepted at home. I am so sick of parents not being there for their kids. On the news in Tulsa Ok, a 3 year old was found walking the streets at night naked and bleeding all because her parents weren't watching her when she outside playing in her yard on her playground set. What parent leavers their 3 year old outside alone playing on a playground set of all things. Anything could have happened besides what did. She could have fallen off the swing or something. That just makes me sick to think about that little girl and that it could have been prevented if the parents were watching their kid. I am also sick of parents leaving it up to the schools and teachers to raise their kids. That is why they are handing out birth control. I do believe that the school shouild contact parents asking them if it is ok to give it to them. Anyway it all comes down to that if parents watched and taught their kids there would not be a problem.

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moodymitzy

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November 9, 2007, 4:10 pm PST

Ok

This is for those of you don't blame Dog for not going on the show. In a way I understand why he didn't but onthe other hand it would have given him a way to explain himself. I am not saying that he should. Yes it was a private conversation. We all say things we don't really mean when we talking with family and friends. The problem is that everyone has taken it way too seriously and it has gotten out of hand. Maybe if he did talk about it and get people to see things from his point of view then at least he could say that he tried to make things right again.

Honestly I think blacks should really back off white people. They want to claim that everyone is racist but it is them who are. Not every white person is racist. Many of the so-called racist are like me and don't hate them because they are black but we hate trasy people whites included. Also I do not think that anyone should use the N word for any reason. White or black they should all stop. Me included. I have used the word myself at times to describe the trashy ones. I do try not to. What I say most of the time is trash. For those of you who want to say stuff about slavery. Well really the Muslims started the slave trade not white people. Also it was the Africans who sold their own people into slavery. The Europeans did not go there and just started taking people.

Another thing, If you are black and have your pants down to your knees expect to be called the N word

If you misuse the word is, expect to be callted the N word.

If you have 5 kids and don't who the father is to any of them, expect to be called the N word.

If you work at a fast food place and you greet the customer by saying "what is you want" expect to be called the N word.

If you are a black man who tries to sleep with anything female, expect to be called the N word.

If you are a Mexican man and try to sleep with anything female or even just stare at them like you are undressing them with your eyes, expect to be called a wetback.

And so on.

Now about the birth control to young kids. If parents watched their kids, talked about sex to their kids, and thier children felt loved and acepted at home their wouldn't be any 11 year olds getting pregnant. I do believe that the schools should get the parents permission first.

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moodymitzy

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November 9, 2007, 7:37 pm PST

11/09 Debate Dr. Phil and the Bishop

Quote From: submom706

OK THIS HAS GONE WAY TO FAR. WHERE IS DOG'S FREEDOM OF SPEECH? HE DID NOT CALL HIS SON'S GIRL FRIEND A N*****. HE SAID THAT THEY USE THAT WORD ALOT. SO ALL OF BLACK AMERICA CALLS HIM A RACIST. BLACK PEOPLE ARE THE WORST RACIST PEOPLE I HAVE EVER MET. NOT ALL OF THEM MIND YOU, THE OLDER FOLKS ARE VERY NICE, BUT THE YOUNG PEOPLE OF THIS RACE ARE AS RUDE AS CAN BE. I LIVE IN THE SOUTH NOW FOR 2 YEARS. I CAN NOW UNSERSTAND WHY THE N WORD IS USED. THE BEHAVIOR AND THE ATTITUDES OF THESE YOUNG BLACK PEOPLE IS WHY. THEY THINK THE WORLD OWES THEM. AL SHARPTON YOU NEED TO GET A LIFE AND WHO MADE YOU SO DAMN PERFECT. AND IT'S OK FOR BLACKS TO CALL EACH OTHER THE N WORD???

ok why are you even replying to my message like this. I was and am on Dog's side here. I was just saying that I can see both points of view as to why he didn't show up on the show. I am like you in a way. I never used the N word until I moved to the south. I agree with you that it is the young ones that make everyone else look bad. There are some older ones too just not so many. Anyway I agree that people need to lay of Dog and understand that i was a personal conversation and get over it all ready.

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moodymitzy

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November 9, 2007, 7:46 pm PST

Amen

Quote From: ljship

This is the truth as I know it also.

It is time the NAACP start educating your people as to the real truth.

I do not support racism either, but it is your group that is making it a reality in the USA.

You don't hear all this garbage in other countries.

Bring your children up with manners and respect and maybe you could help change the world.

Accept your responsibility and start in your homes.

I pick up my grandson at the bus stop and I hear the N word all the time from 1st graders. I've even seen them at the bus stop de pants each other. How disgusting all this is you start your children at birth that you are different. Well you are NOT. You are a human so start acting like one.

I have seen so many of their children acting disrespectfully. I have also seen this in other races as well including white. It seems that nobody wants to actually teach their kids anything. They expect the schools to do it for them. I wonder how so many black youths actually pass English. We all know that can not speak it properly.So many times when I have my 18 month old at the park and he is playing on the playground trying to climb up the stairs to go down the swing some liittle black kid comes running up and tries to push him out of the way. I get so mad at stuff like that.

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Messages By: moodymitzy

Afraid to Ask for What You Want Sexually?

Gag me.

Get a Clue

You are mostly right

11/09 Debate Dr. Phil and the Bishop

Finally

The problem is

Ok

11/09 Debate Dr. Phil and the Bishop

Amen