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February 24, 2006, 12:31 pm PST

infidelity

Shows about cheaters are always interesting, especially when Dr. Phil gives the cheater some tough love.

I bet $10 that Dr. Phil will say that stastistic about how "relationships that started out as affairs have a less than 10% (or is it 5%) chance of surviving because this relationship is based on deceit and has no moral foundation"

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elwood

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February 26, 2006, 5:49 pm PST

well, it's not that simple

Quote From: dewaele

Dealing with cheating is simple as far as I'm concerned. No turning back, no negotiating, nothing. I do not believe cheating can be reconciled, and I would end my relationship immediately if there was infidelity (as I have in the past). Its not up for discussion, and I don't understand how people can feel otherwise. I could never allow a cheater to lay a hand on me ever again. I would be interested in hearing an opinion on the subject that differs from mine- unless its to tell me some "for the sake of the children" story. I would never want to set an example for my children that infidelity is acceptable. I think having children is MORE of a reason to split up if there is infidelity- show them how unacceptable it really is.

It's not that easy if you have years of happy memories with your Significant Other, especially if they get down on their hands and knees and beg and say that they can change. It's hard to turn your back on someone that you donated years of your life to and just walk away.

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elwood

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March 8, 2006, 12:33 pm PST

marlon and shamika

It's too bad Marlon and Shamika filed for divorce. Dr. Phil was really trying to help them. I guess whatever issues or differences they had to overcome were just too much.

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elwood

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April 24, 2006, 9:11 am PDT

The main problem I had with this episode was...

we didn't get to hear the little girl's side of the story. She didn't get to voice her feelings about losing her mom or living with this different woman or anything. So all we hear about her is what Barbara said about how she is a brat, and frankly, that does make me feel less sympathy for Ambreah. Although I think Barbara is totally out of line when she seriously thinks about killing her, I can understand why she would be frustrated and angry with a child who listens at doors, talks back to her, throws up repeatedly in her car, hates her cooking, etc, etc. I just think the episode would have been more well-rounded if the child would have been given her own voice instead of everyone else speaking for her (including Dr. Phil).

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elwood

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April 24, 2006, 10:36 am PDT

04/24 The Final Ultimatum

Quote From: kyrosemom

You have less sympathy for a 6 yr old who is mentally messed up? I am floored.

Just 2 yrs ago, this little girl's life was turned upside down. She has, for all intents and purposes, lost her mother, and her dad is married to the thing he screwed around on her mom with. She wants her mom, for goodness sake. Barbara is not even a mildly acceptable replacement. Children can sense when you do not like them. It does not sound like Barbara even tried to be decent to this kid.

After going through this horrifying ordeal, of COURSE Ambreah is going to act up and pull stunts. A little more compassion is what is warranted, along with some love and some help for that child.

So, put her on TV ? I think not. I think it would do more damage. Is it not bad enough that her father cares more about keeping that piece of booty than making sure his child is safe and getting help for her issues?

I might be harsh, but I have ZERO sympathy for Ed or Barbara.

Well, they let Ed and Shelia's kids talk about their feelings on that show, and it was taped so I'm sure the staff did everything to make them feel comfortable about opening up. Of course I don't think they should put the kid in front of the studio audience.

http://drphil.com/shows/show/524/

I'm sorry if you are floored by my honesty, but that is how I feel.

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elwood

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April 24, 2006, 10:39 am PDT

04/24 The Final Ultimatum

Quote From: kyrosemom

You have less sympathy for a 6 yr old who is mentally messed up? I am floored.

Just 2 yrs ago, this little girl's life was turned upside down. She has, for all intents and purposes, lost her mother, and her dad is married to the thing he screwed around on her mom with. She wants her mom, for goodness sake. Barbara is not even a mildly acceptable replacement. Children can sense when you do not like them. It does not sound like Barbara even tried to be decent to this kid.

After going through this horrifying ordeal, of COURSE Ambreah is going to act up and pull stunts. A little more compassion is what is warranted, along with some love and some help for that child.

So, put her on TV ? I think not. I think it would do more damage. Is it not bad enough that her father cares more about keeping that piece of booty than making sure his child is safe and getting help for her issues?

I might be harsh, but I have ZERO sympathy for Ed or Barbara.

Well, they let Ed and Shelia's children talk about how they were feeling. They had it taped, though, and I'm sure the staff made sure the kids felt comfortable about opening up about their feelings. Of course I don't think they should let the kid go on TV.

http://drphil.com/shows/show/524/

I'm sorry if you are floored by my honesty, but that is how I feel. I didn't say I feel no sympathy for Ambreah, because I do feel sorry for her and hope she finds some peace in her life. I'm just saying that acting out and being bratty is wrong too.

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elwood

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April 24, 2006, 11:56 am PDT

you all need to stop putting words in my mouth

Did I say that what Barbara did was right? NO I DIDN'T!

Did I say that the little girl deserved what she got? NO I DIDN'T!

All I said was that her behavior was not exactly the best, and while I TOTALLY DO NOT THINK THAT BARBARA SHOULD BE HITTING HER, I can understand a little her feelings of frustration.

SHEEESH.

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elwood

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April 24, 2006, 3:03 pm PDT

04/24 The Final Ultimatum

Quote From: lucky24

Once again joeyjohn I agree with you.

Elwood we are not trying to pick on you. I can see what you were trying to communicate. The problem is as jj said, Barbara may potentially read these posts and she needs to see that there is not one ounce of support for her horriffic attitude and actions. Even saying you could possibly understand her frustration gives her too much support.

As someone else said, it's not your honesty we are all objecting to. To even give the slight impression you sympathize with her is like saying Hitler could be a nice guy too sometimes.

Well, thanks for your kind words, i guess

I just wanted you all to know that it was never my intention to defend Barbara's hitting Ambreah

I just wanted people to see that the situation is not black-and-white.

The little girl probably has some behavioral problems that she will need to overcome, and I hope she does.

Some of your remarks about how I was defending a child abuser hurt me very badly and made me cry and I am not a big crier.

Needless to say, I won't be posting here for a long time. Maybe some of you will be glad, I don't know.

I learned a lesson today though. If I ever want to express an opinion that goes against the majority, you really need to have a backbone because it is not easy.

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Messages By: elwood

infidelity

well, it's not that simple

marlon and shamika

The main problem I had with this episode was...

04/24 The Final Ultimatum

04/24 The Final Ultimatum

you all need to stop putting words in my mouth

04/24 The Final Ultimatum