Messages By: karen_kiki

Alex can be the most wonderful young man and very much in control however when his meds don't work, or he oushes the therapy out of his brain, which is not always aware he is doing it, he will have these fits, rages and creates complete disruption in our lives, that includes his own. 

Alex is a very smart young man and very talented.  He has so much potential but our fear in life is that one of his rages will bring that all to a halting end. 

As any parent wants the best for thier child so do we.  

We hope that you will find some answers in our story and that we can continue to email and contact each other.  We are not alone and we and our children deserves answers as well as support to make it one day at a time. 

My thoughts are with you as we take this journey in life. 

I met someone a few years back who chose not to be my friend.  Her reason was that if we didn't have Special Needs Children we would not have met or had anything in common, and she didn't want our children to link us together.  I feel very sad for her as friends are important in life, and friends who understand and care are invaluable.  I am reaching out to be your friend as we all need support. 

Karen 

Thank you.  Alex is on meds and you will see that when you watch the show, however we are learning that the meds are not the right ones and it takes time to get someone to listen and adjust what needs adjusting.  Alex is very smart and STATS are important to him especially when it comes to SPORTS.  He is musically talented and would like some day to appear on American Idol.  We believe there is so much good from his Aspergers and we encourage him to embrace the good.  We reached out to Dr. Phil because we needed more answers and help.  Answers and Help the medical gurus were not providing us....This show will open your eyes.  Please stay in touch, Alex needs people like you to help encourage him. 

With our thanks, Karen 

Thanks to Dr. Phil we see the light at the end of a very long tunnel.  It is true I have not taken care of myself or my relationship with my husband and I have felt extremely angry for some time.  Not angry at Alex but at not being the Parent who can fix it all and make the home like the perfect family from the 50's and 60's.  Ok, I know there was no perfect family however TV and Movies are deceiving.  But I want him to have the best life he can and I want to be able to relax and not worry about the not so NORMAL things.   

Example, last night after the Basketball Game Alex got a ride home with friends.  We left the game at 9:30 p.m. and there was 1 minute left of play (they won).  Alex didn't get home for another 90 minutes.  Under typical circumstances I would have been a worriesome mother, last night I was not just a worriesome mother but I was worrying beyond belief.  Was he calm, was he raging, had he run off due to anger, or was he being a Teenager and not thinking things through and in an environment not appropriate for him.... 

I had to hold back when he walked in happy, calm and unaware that it took an extra hour or so to get home.  He actually walked in, told us how the game finished, who brought him home and how they had to dropped off two other people first (the driver's girlfriend and her friend) on the opposite side of the community. 

Since I am always waiting for the other shoe to drop I am always ready to jump in on things..........luckily along with getting Alex some help I have found someone who I too will be working with to help me get through life (my life).  I look forward to working with viewers like yourself who can help me and I in turn will be able to help.  Reaching out getting the support we need for ourselves and our families is what will bring us all WELLNESS. 

Thanks for you support, Karen 

Although the bad sometimes seems to out weigh the good the reality of it is the Good is GREAT but when Alex goes BAD it tears everything apart. 

Just tonight when we came home from work we found Alex had gotten onto the internet (although it has been locked down) and he got to places he should not and used our checking account on these sites. 

Alex becomes obsessed with ideas and cannot let go and he will do whatever it takes to get what he wants.  This is what worries us.... 

We are not wealthy peope and we cannot afford not to work and be with him 24/7. 

When he is in control he is a typical boy but when the switch flips it worse then world war 3.  I am grateful for Dr. Phil and his staff and help we are getting. 

I am so glad that your early intervention helped and addressed the behaviors which resulted in your good fortune today.  We have not been so lucky. 

Alex has been in treatment, has been on meds, in therapy but as we are finding out it has not been right.....We are now looking a brighter future as we are being introduced to new therapies, diets and meds. 

Please keep in touch 

Thank you for your kind words.  I too have met some wonderful people who don't judge and sometimes are more supportive of Alex then I am at times.  However it is sad when people don't want to be friends (or relatives) because they don't understand our situation and don't want to.  They want to live in Fantasy Land where everything is perfect.  The problem is there is no such place and even if there was I am not sure I would want to live there myself. 

We are anxiously awaiting to watch this on Tuesday as well............................. 

Although Dr. Phil and staff did show a lot of the MELTDOWNS we did discuss how wonderful Alex can be.  Alex has a heart of gold when his electrical system is not out of control.  Alex not only is ASPERGER but also has ADHD and Mood Disorders.  Usually an Asperger individual has multiple neurological issues and they overlap. 

We have feared Alex over the years and yet we know he has so much good in him that we are SEARCHING for the answers to help him be more even tempered and to face each day as a wonderful challenge. 

None of us are perfect we all have issues but it is learning to work with the imperfections and for some it's medication and therapy and for others it's diet and meds or diet and therapy.  Whatever it is, I only hope that Alex and the many other individuals out there that can relate to him will be able to find the help to their issues and make their lives better. 

It tears me apart when his meltdowns cause him to say things like, I want to die, I want out of this world, I'm a retard....  The bottom line is Alex is very bright,  He is very talented, he has a beautiful singing voice.  Alex loves sports and ask him anything about Baseball and he will show you his true passion. 

So even if Dr. Phil shows the MELTDOWN side it's OK, because he has led us to help and help will be there for others.  I pledge to let others know what they too can do for themselves as well as for others. 

Keep well and know you and your child are in our thoughts and prayers. 

I hear your story and you are one of the lucky ones.  Although our Alex is extremely bright, talented, sings well and loves to perform!  He is a sports fanatic and has been since age 4, so we can relate.  However his form of Asperger's also includes a mood swing disorder and that is what has pulled us apart and takes a toll  on the family.  We love him so much, and that is why we reached out to Dr. Phil.  Dr. Phil and his staff have been WONDERFUL and the resources they have provided are amazing. 

We hope that people will understand ASPERGER SYNDROME is a huge spectrum and that not all ASPERGER Children are like Alex but those that are need more help and need to be understood.  Parents such and myself and my husband need some respite as well. 

We aren't complaining we are blessed to have Alex, but we want to provide the best life for him and hopefully others will benefit as well. 

I just called Alex in as I read your note.  This sounds like me writing about Alex.  Alex not only has AS but he has Mood Swing Disorders, that causes the influx of his meltdowns.  Alex too has the obsessive need to play video games and WIN.  You cannot reason with him and he too will yell, scream, hit, throw and call me names. 

Alex wants Bradley to know that what he did in middle school to get through the social aspects was to show off all of his talents, in Alex's case it was Singing, and still is.  Alex also is a sports fanatic and he got himself involved as a team manager when he wasn't able to make the team.   

In Middle School he ran cross country (and although not fast he competed against himself week after week and improved!)  Alex says being on the sports teams gives him the opportunity to mix with Upper Class men which works for him, they seem to accept him better then his own classmates. 

Girls also seem to be more understanding as well....although at an age where they want to begin dating, having a male friend is important to them and they will gravitate towards Bradley too. 

Alex wishes Bradley all the luck in the world.  Please keep in touch and know we care, we've been there and we're still there! 

Please hold on and watch.  I know how you feel and that's why I wrote Dr. Phil.  The message board is taking up my life right now but that's OK because maybe WE ALL CAN GET HELP.  Alex is AS as well as ADHD and has Mood Swing Disorders. 

Schools do not have the training and the facilities to work with us.  We have been a bit luckier but I battle with the school system weekly (sometimes daily).   

After the show you will know where to turn, if not, please contact me through the message board again and I will be there for you. 

Please know there is light at the end of the tunnel but the tunnel is long...............................We still have not started the new treatment yet and we are awaiting the next stage. 

With loving thoughts.  Karen 

Thank you for writing and I do hope you will watch.  I know that this spectrum is vast and not all AS people will see themselves in our story.  Alex has ADHD as well as Mood Swing Disorders and all together it makes life pretty hectic for us all.  It has me sad as I have seen the good in my child and I want what is best for him.  But I too want a life and I am tired of the uncaring people around us.  I had to go to this extreme to get help for Alex and others like him. 

My niece has twins each with AS one is docile the other is Hyperactive.  I love them both and I will be supportive to her and to the twins and all others with this condition as I cannot imagine what is going on in the brains of an AS individual who often times feels so out of control of their own thinking. 

You will see how much we love Alex and we will continue to fight for what he needs to make it in this world.