Messages By: nscrchick

Getting over something implies we are avoiding the obstacle and will probably have the same obstacle face us once again. But if we go through it, feel and experience it for all it is, when we do get to the other side, we will have experienced it completely so that when we are up against it again, the fear won't make us want to "run and get over it" but know that "we went through this once" and we now have the confidence and wisdom that makes it easier the next time.

Accepting porn, cheating, accepting homosexuality in our lives does not imply "we" accept it within ourselves but that we "accept" it as the way it is for others. It gives that person the freedom to be was they want to be and our controlling has no place in it. If we can love all beings, even our enemies, then our life will be a much more peaceful and useful. If we fight against the tide, we will drown, if we go with flow of it, it just might take us back home. But struggling never seems to be the way to go.

If a man starts living a homosexual lifestyle, or if he spends his time and money on porn, or if he cheats on his wife, who is really suffering? I know my husband looks at porn, every day if he could, I don't think he cheats on me with someone else, I do question his sexual preferences. But this is all relative. I am not here to figure out what or who he is or what or whom he sexually prefers to be with, in mind and in heart. I am here to figure out how I react to these things. My reaction of loss of control, anger, humility , rejections, hurts, these are things that even though his actions may have initially "pulled the rug from under me" I chose to stay under. By trying to figure him out, I lost touch with who I am and then that's when the real trouble begins.

Start with a moment by moment analysis of how "you" are feeling and grow to accept all sides. The ugly, the beautiful, the joyous, the depressed. The more you can accept you for who you are you will see that the actions of others, although they may hurt you and continue to pull the rug from you, you will have the confidence in youself that you will be ok, no matter what happens.

also does not mean

You can not blame the mom for sleeping and her kids doing drugs, please come on seriously. If I blamed my parents for everything I did while they were sleeping, I'd get out of everything. Being a teenager in highschool, I do stuff in front of my parents & they don't realize it. Parents just want to think that their child wouldn't do that, and come to reality they do. And showing the tapes in school, it'd do nothing. They show us tapes all the time & my highschool is one of the biggest cocain/herion/meth abuse schools and I live in a super nice town with less then 20,000 people. It happens everywhere, it's never going to change, but don't blame the parents for what these girls did, they chose to do drugs. The parents didn't sit there with a needle & be like "hey inject your-self"