Messages By: tacdgb

Healing is what you need.  That's the only way you'll make peace with it.  Find a counselor that you can trust to talk to.  Keep talking until you feel peace.  Quit talking to you mom She'll never understand what you went through.  Find others in your life to talk to.  Find someone who'll support you.  It's hard but it can be done.  I am so sorry that you went through this.  Living a life of abuse as a child isn't easy and now having to live with unhealed feelings isn't easy either.  I understand you pain as my father was one of my abusers at the age of 3 (from what I can remember).  I will send you a safe hug.   

I believe that spanking is cruel.  Spanking is not nessessary.  I believe that there are LOTS of other ways to disipiline children.  I believe in the dicipline methods that Dr. Phil talks about on his show.  I taught preschool for 18 years and I found out if you use currency like Dr. Phil talks about it really does work.  I think that spanking is teaching kids that violence is the answer to dealing with disipline issues and that' s wrong. 

I am so glad that Dr. Phil is willing to adress mental health issues.  I know someone with Bi-Polar and I don't know much about it.  But I do know about Multiple Personality Disorder as I have that.  And through having that I know that  it makes life no fun.   I also know that the treatment is not cheap.  So  I am thamkful for people with insurance which helps them as I don't have any.   I am so sorry that anyone who has to go through any mental health issues.  I know that God takes care of them. And I am glad for that.  But I do know this.  Don't let anyone tell you that mental health issues are not real.  As they are and you have to deal with them everyday and it can be real hard.   

I am so sorry to see this family in such a mess.  I do know that it's not about her bad spending habits it's about why she spends.  I could tell that she's in a real lot of emotional pain and also in denial about things.  I feel so sorry for the kids to have to go through this.  It has a real effect on how they turn out as adults.  I've heard this said "It's better to create a wonderful child than to have to repair an adult."  I do know that it's true as I am being the repaired adult.  I know that the husband has work to do as well.  I do know that if they have a willing spirit and with Dr. Phil's help and God's this family can be healed.  I do pray tor that.    

How porn has affected my marriage.  Well..........  I start by saying that it has affected it alot.  We haven't had sex in over 8 years.  My husband always told me "I don't want to have  sex"  and then I find him watching a porn flick or reading a porn book.  When we were first dating he took me out of town to meet his family and he took me to a xxx rated motel to stay over night.  I didn't think it was all that great.  During the course of our marriage we've battled the issue of porn alot.  I've had to clean all the porn out of our house.  My husband would hide it or justify it by saying it was ok to have it.  He's said that reading it's no big deal.  He's told me that "It's just something to read".  I've told him that porn is taking something special as sex and turned it into something dirty.  He didn't by it.  I've told him that he's addicted to it.  He's denied that.  I found a counselor who would help him and he refused to go.  One year friends of ours wanted us to go with them on our motorcycles to california to a cool motorcycle convention.  Well......................  My husband lost his job as janitor at our local church.  He was caught reading porn on the church internet.   And that was the end of our trip.  At home I have a block on our computer so he can't read porn.  I am so tired of porn in my life that I could scream!  You ask why did I marry him knowing this.  Well...............  I was blind to it and he was convincing that it was just a hobby.  Well I am no fool.  The message I would send to anyone who is dating someone with porn issues is RUN like hell..........  If it's not dealth with you'll battle it all of your marriage.  You feel undesirable when he doesn't want to have sex.  You'll never trust him, he'll lie about doing it and it will be one of the things you fight alot in your marriage.  It's a real hard additction to cure.   

How porn has affected my marriage.  Well..........  I start by saying that it has affected it alot.  We haven't had sex in over 8 years.  My husband always told me "I don't want to have  sex"  and then I find him watching a porn flick or reading a porn book.  When we were first dating he took me out of town to meet his family and he took me to a xxx rated motel to stay over night.  I didn't think it was all that great.  During the course of our marriage we've battled the issue of porn alot.  I've had to clean all the porn out of our house.  My husband would hide it or justify it by saying it was ok to have it.  He's said that reading it's no big deal.  He's told me that "It's just something to read".  I've told him that porn is taking something special as sex and turned it into something dirty.  He didn't by it.  I've told him that he's addicted to it.  He's denied that.  I found a counselor who would help him and he refused to go.  One year friends of ours wanted us to go with them on our motorcycles to california to a cool motorcycle convention.  Well......................  My husband lost his job as janitor at our local church.  He was caught reading porn on the church internet.   And that was the end of our trip.  At home I have a block on our computer so he can't read porn.  I am so tired of porn in my life that I could scream!  You ask why did I marry him knowing this.  Well...............  I was blind to it and he was convincing that it was just a hobby.  Well I am no fool.  The message I would send to anyone who is dating someone with porn issues is RUN like hell..........  If it's not dealth with you'll battle it all of your marriage.  You feel undesirable when he doesn't want to have sex.  You'll never trust him, he'll lie about doing it and it will be one of the things you fight alot in your marriage.  It's a real hard additction to cure.