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Messages By: debbgirl

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November 15, 2005, 3:12 pm CST

leogirl

Quote From: leogirl

I talked with my husband last night regarding the whole cheating subject.   I asked him why he cheated on his ex-wife (they were divorced in 2000).  He said that she wouldn't cook, clean and refused to have sex with him.  His family also told me that she was abusive toward him.  I asked him if I was doing everything that I needed to do to make him happy.  He looked at me as if I were insane and replied by saying "h*ll yea baby!  You make me feel wanted and needed.   You go over and beyond to make sure that I am taken care of.  You make me feel like the sexiest man alive."  (I am 110 and he is quite a bit overweight but still VERYsexy to me).  Of course, it is a two way street.  He makes me feel the same way.   I told him about the show and the only response I received was "you are watching way too many talk shows."  (with a grin on his face)  :-) 

  

Jenn 

I hope for your sake that when your wonderful husband leaves you and marries his third wife, that he doesn't talk like that about you. Please don't be so naive to think that it could not happen to you, I am sure his first wife thought it would never happen to her.
 
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January 4, 2006, 8:26 pm CST

Juliegg

Quote From: juliebgg

My goal for 2006 is for overall good health habits.  Aside from eating healthy, I want to keep up a good exercise regime, as well as get those necessary check ups.   It is important to make time just to relax too.  It may sound old fashioned, but curling up by the fire with a good book is an enjoyable (and inexpensive) way to spend a cold winter evening with my family. There is enough to do during the day, so "down" time is a must. I wish a happy, and healthy 2006 to all of you!!!! 

You are so right about having "down time", it rejuvenates me. I am 53, on my birth certificate, but in my heart and my head I am much younger. Eating right and joining the gym has been so good for me. Sometimes I don't feel like going to do another workout, but once I get to the gym, I feel so much better about myself. I wish all of us a good year of health and fitness. Happy New Year!
 
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December 12, 2006, 3:55 pm CST

more to blame than fashion

Yes, the fashion industry plays a big part in women "dying to be thin", but we also have to look at  other actresses like Jennifer Anniston (just an example) who are very thin, most of these women we read about are size "0", or as I read the other week, less than size "0".  What does  a dress or pants or shirt look like in less than size "0"?  Can't imagine it.  The media reports in the rag mags that if one of these actresses wears a baggy shirt that they are automatically pregnant, or if god forbid they may have a little tummy that they have put on a few pounds.  The media is our worst enemy, but we continue to believe everything they report.  We have to be our own police on what we read or watch on TV.  We are all responsible for our own selves, especially the adults, and we have to teach our children to have self confidence from the time they are small, and can only hope that they carry that through to adulthood.
 
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May 6, 2007, 4:18 pm CDT

Alishia

Quote From: alishia

Well I will not say all that because I never heard how he was with her before she cheated on him. Was he nice? from what I seen on the 1st show he became this way due to her cheating. Now that's no excuse for his behavior.  I would leave him, but she is the reason he is like he is. She not only cheated but she kept trying to have affairs. The marriage is over. I do not believe it can be saved.
Alishia, I am so surprised that you would say that she made him act like that!!!!!  He apparently acted like that right from the start, starting with her not having any friends or family at the wedding.  He chose to act like he did because of his own insecurities, not because of her.  He is like any other abuser who constantly blames other people for his actions.  I bet you would think differently if you were in her shoes.  This whole story is like a Hollywood movie, a sicko movie to be exact.  The things he does to her are so off the wall that it is almost hard to believe if I didn't hear him say that he actually did these things.  I hope you are never in a situation like this, it is a very scary thing.  Please think about what you wrote, it is just not right.   The things he has done and is still doing are so typical, things that we have all heard about, estranging her from friends and family, keeping money from her, accusing her of everything under the sun.  I fear he may do something worse to her and the children, those poor kids.   I hope she doesn't go back to him, from the sounds of it, he will never change because he doesn't want to, he doesn't think he has done anything wrong.
 
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May 6, 2007, 4:35 pm CDT

Love!!!!

 We have all heard of people saying about someone, "I love him/her to death".  I am so afraid that Jeffrey is going to love his wife to her death.  What a scary man, particularly because he thinks that what he is doing to her equates into how much he loves her, if that is love, I would rather be a hermit.  Please Dr.Phil, make sure she and her children are safe, they should be moved to another town or city, with a name change, and money to start a new life, she had a job before, and she can get another one, she just can't ever let her guard down with this guy. 
 
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October 11, 2007, 8:22 pm CDT

Homecoming

  This is such a tragedy, even though I don't personally know any of the people involved, I feel so sorry for all the families.   Please accept our deepest sympathies.
 
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October 13, 2007, 1:03 pm CDT

Russell Vlaandeen

Quote From: hpmx59

Battle Book Doctor J. O. Phil Simpson The. Are you kidding me? O.J. Simpson never did any crime at all.---

See you on Monday Octobet 15th, 2007. Sincerley Your. Russell Vlaandeen.-----------------------------------------

Russell, what are you trying to say?  I do not understand any of your messages, they don't make any sense at all.    Are you serious that OJ never did any crime at all?    Please think out what your going to write before you write it so that it makes sense to the rest of us.
 
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October 13, 2007, 1:07 pm CDT

Man Camp

I too am bored with the Man Camp Series.  None of these couples should be married, they are all very immature, both the men and the women. 
 
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October 19, 2007, 2:24 pm CDT

The Bonnie Chronicles

Quote From: confuzzledwife

This Bonnie is a nut- I don't believe her.. surprised Dr. Phil said "you don't seem the type to whore around".. Can Dr. Phil be that blind?  I could see right through her- it's always the ones that don't look the type ... you can see it in her eyes, she's nuts.. why did she quit her job as a teacher if she had nothing to hide?  So what if she had to be investigated- if she had nothing to hide, she should have just done what the school wanted, instead- she quit.. that shows me guilt.

Another thing, I think she's jealous over him getting back with his ex. I believe she swung that baseball bat around- I know people like this...  they look so innocent.. but they are master manipulators.. am I going to be sued now? heh

Yeah the guy's quirky.. but I believe him- he had every right to tape record her phone conversations.. if she had nothing to hide this wouldn't be a problem- she's a psycho.

Are you Charles wife?  This man is every woman's nightmare.  Relationships should alwys remain private, even when they end.  What good does it do to assassinate someone's character?  Makes Charles seem like a little kid on a play ground.  I was totally disgusted with him and what he did.  He had no right to do what he did.  Whatever happened in they're relationship had nothing to do with her family, friends or her work.  And he must have been nuts for saying she had Aids, he had to have known it was something that could be proven with simple blood tests, what a fool he has made himself look like.  This is the kind of guy that every woman should be wary of, remember his face ladies, if he comes on to you, run, run as fast as you can.  Jealousy can be a very sick and demented disease.  Wow can't believe what he did.
 
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October 22, 2007, 3:23 pm CDT

Alison 32

Quote From: alison_32

I am really annoyed with today's show, as I feel that Dr. Phil spent most of his time making a mockery of the exwife and her fiance' than advising them and/or pointing them in the right direction. Don't get me wrong, I love Dr. Phil and have the utmost respect for him. I record the show daily to avoid missing it, however, I am just really disappointed with the outcome of today's show.

First, I agree that the exwife is obviously still harboring pain from the divorce along with jealousy towards the exhusband's financial stability. There is obviously no question that some personal counselling is needed for her; specifically, in my opinion, some spiritual counselling to help her forgive her exhusband completely. The unforgiveness she holds inside is not hurting him, but is actually poisoning her entire body, emotionally, physically, mentally, and spiritually. If she could just seek some spiritual counsel on how to ask for God to teach her how to forgive him and the new wife, while understanding that forgiveness doesn't mean justifying the other's behavior, but releases her from that bondage completely and gives her inner peace, I believe it would benefit everyone in the situation;most importantly, the children involved.

I do, however, understand her frustration with the child support situation. Unfortunately, it is all too often a distorted belief on the behalf of the absent parent that when he/she pays their child support obligation, that he/she is in no way responsible to provide any further financial assistance outside of the court mandated amount. The fact is, child support is paid to the custodial parent specifically to financially assist him/her in providing the child with the basic necessities of living such as running water, food, shelter, clothing, proper hygiene, etc. When extra expenses come along, it is still the absent parent's responsibility to at least pay for half of those things such as the yearbook mentioned in today's program. Anyone who has children knows that extra expenses are always coming along such as school fees, sports fees, tutoring fees, extra curricular activity/attendance fees for school dances, football games, basketball games, field trip fees, etc. The child support paid out is not meant to cover those kinds of expenses. I feel that maybe she should have asked if her exhusband would be willing to split the cost of the yearbook with her rather than expecting him to pay the entire amount. 

I feel that the exwife came back to the show to try to get some real help and advice this time because she felt she was not only wrongfully portrayed during her last appearance, but felt she was unable to get any type of support for her issues. She obviously felt there were too many things left unsaid and unresolved, hence, the notes she wrote on her hand in attempt to remember the things she wanted to get addressed. As for the dentist appointment, I really do not feel it was necessary to bring the issue up, as it just appeared to be an attempt to portray the exhusband to the viewers as an unreliable parent. I do feel, however, it is the responsibility of the absent parent to assist the custodial parent in taking the child to doctor visits of any kind.

At any rate, I will close this small book I have written (haha) by saying that there were far too many comedic approaches towards the exwife and her fiance' and not enough guidance on how to solve the issues at hand. Obviously, the root of the problem needs to be addressed, which is the pain and jealousy harbored by the exwife before anything else can be done. Next, a mediator needs to be involved to avoid anymore contact between the exspouses. Finally and most importantly, the children need to begin some counselling to help each of them overcome the trauma this entire mess has caused each of them. As for the exwife and her concerns about the exhusband's finances, I would just simply advise her to request a modification and/or investigation be done within the child support enforcement agency and if that doesn't work, I would request an audit be done on the exhusband's finances. I pray that God blesses each of these individuals with some kind of inner peace and provides each of them with the guidance to move forward and leave the past where it lies.

Alison, the only thing I agree with you about is that the ex needs counselling.  Dr.Phil tried everything to try and make this woman understand that everything she was saying was not productive at all, and she said she understood what he was saying, but then she would start right back up with the "he said, she said game".  There was no making her understand, and she will most likely continue this crazy behavior when they get home.  No amount of counselling will make her stop.  So don't blame Dr.Phil, that woman was making all of us watching the show have migraine headaches.  She didn't want a solution to the problem, she just wanted a venue to rant and rave.
 

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