Messages By: mac2mar

I am a 50-yr old mother of 3.  22 yrs. ago my husband and I desparately wanted children.  We exhausted all fertility procedures and succeeded with invitro fertilization 17 yrs.ago.  Then several yrs.  later, we conceived naturally.  Although I love my children deeply, and I spent numerous nights and days crying and in despair to have children, I believe God instills in us a drive to have children at a certain time in our lives.  We become desparate.  However, this time period, although very painful, does pass and the drive weakens so we can focus on other stages of our lives.  Please do not give up or jeopardize  a relationship, just to have kids.  If you do have children and your husband still does not want them, then you will have brought children into the world and into a divorce.  My suggestion would be to act as foster parents for the many children in need of homes.  After some time taking care of children, you may decide it's not as important as you thought it would be or your husband might change his mind and reconsider his decision not to have children.  Either way, don't rush into anything.  If I could redo anything about the time we spent in infertility treatments, it would be to try to not make that our main focus--to enjoy each other and look for joy in life and not dwell on what we didn't have.