Messages By: wsrchick

I think it is incredibly funny how this man thinks there is nothing wrong with polyfidelity but at the same time, he still needs validation from people including the complete strangers in the audience!  

Even though he has his arm around his wife and holds her hand and says that he does care, he obviously doesn't. If he did care, it would show. He can say as much as he wants, but what it really comes down to is the results.  

My opinion is, once a cheater...always a cheater. You can love someone with all your heart and soul, but if they disrespected your relationship and you as a person so much that they cheated on you then what would make you think they wouldn't do it again!? 

I think the wife should get out of that relationship. She is wasting her time with someone who is not completely willing to try to make things better. She needs to find a life for herself where she feels respected, loved, and important. 

I am 22 weeks pregnant. According to every pregnancy book I've read, my sex drive should increase during the second trimester...well, I'm almost done with the second trimester and it's done anyting BUT increase! I can't seem to orgasm during sex. My husband thinks it's his fault even though I tell him it's the pregnancy. I just feel generally uncomfortable, tired, and just not into making love. Truthfully, I think that another reason is that my husband has gained some weight lately and his belly and my belly get in the way. It's not that I don't want sex at all, it's just that I don't want it every day or even every other day. Once a week would be enough for me!  

Is this normal?  Have any of you had the same experience? Any advice? 

Hi Sarah. I just wanted to let you know that it's not whether your baby girl has a daddy or not, it's how she's raised.  

My father left my mom and I when I was only 2 years old. Because oe being so young, I had no idea what had happened. When I started school and noticed the other kids had mommies and daddies, of course I had questions. But my mom always said that was just how some people lived, with a daddy and a mommy and some people just had a mommy and some just had a daddy. She also explained that my daddy loved me but he was very busy. That worked until I was about 9 years old when I wondered where my daddy was and if he did love me then why didn't he ever come to see me.   

My mom had always left it open for my dad to contact me but he never had. It was then that I decided to contact him. He seemed excited and agreed to meet us for lunch. I was so excited after that because I hadn't seen him in 7 years. We had lunch and then he asked if he could take me out that weekend to the roller skating rink. We planned to meet eachother there at the rink. That weekend, I waited at the roller rink for 3 hours by myself and finally called my mom. He never showed. After that I was so heart broken that i didn't talk to him for another 6 years. My mom was also extremely upset. After that I just thought my dad was a dead beat and that I was better off without him. When I was 15 years old, I went to Mexico on a missions trip and needed a notorized letter from him so that I could get a passport. By that time I had grown up a little and felt a little sorry for my dad because of the way he led his life and that he was missing mine. When my mom called him for the letter, he asked to talk to me. I agreed and he said he wanted to reenter my life. I then told him during that conversation that I wasn't ready to talk to him on the phone because of how hurt I was by the last time. We then started writing letters back and forth. I explained how hurt I was and because of how he had missed my whole life that he wasn't ever going to be my dad. He was only my biological father. I explained that the time that I needed him most, he missed. After quite a few letters, I let him come see me. He bought me a cell phone and new clothes. A few months later, he basically disappeared off the face of the earth. He quit his work, he no longer lived at his old address(he used to live about 4 hours from me), he stopped paying my cell phone bill, and his phone was disconnected. For all I knew, he was dead. Unfortunately, I was used to his flakiness by that time.  

I'm now almost 21, married, and pregnant with our first son. My dad died July 17th 2005. He had started using drugs again and was an avid alcoholic. He died of a heart attack ironically in the town where I lived until I got married. My dad had 3 other daughters from two mothers and did the same thing to them as he did to me. My sisters and everyone else found out right away, but since I had moved no one that knew him knew where I was or how to get ahold of my mom. I found out 4 months later. I was shocked at first and then pissed off. I was so angry that he was selfish even when he died. He never really tried to get to know us girls and was only concerned with his own life.  

Even though everything he put me through was heart breaking, I'm so glad I went through it. I wouldn't be who I am today without all of it. One of my favorite sayings is "What doesn't kill you will make you stronger" and I am such a strong person because of it. It's sad that my dad was so selfish because he missed out on so much. Out of four beautiful little girls, 3 have grown into amazing women, and the youngest (my sister Karli) is still a young teenager developing into a strong young woman. If there was only one good thing my dad did in this world, it was to help bring 4 very strong young women into it.  

So don't spend your time worrying about how your daughter will turn out, instead spend your time helping her grow. It will be harder for you because you have to be the mother and the father for her. She will hate you at times for it, but she will always know that you love her and that you were only trying your best. Always make sure that you asure her that she does't need a daddy. She is beautiful, healthy, strong, loving, kind, and loved by so many people. She doesn't need a daddy to be those things.  

Well, I'm sorry this ended up being so long, but I hope it was helpful. Good luck but don't think you need it! 

sincerely, 

Megan   

I think that Lauren's attitude about her entitlement to so many things is sadly the attitude of most kids her age right now. My brother in law is 18 and seems to have the same attitude. They want to do less and get more for it or else they would rather not work at all for ANYTHING! My brother in law said to me just last weekend while we were visiting, "I hate Sundays!" I asked why and he said, "Because I have to do stuff for other people." On Sundays, he has to pick up our 89 year old grandma, bring her to church with all of us, and then go to lunch with the family. He drives my in law's Cadillac Escilade and doesn't pay for insurence or gas or anything. My in law's do make him work a little around the house like helping out with mowing the lawn and cleaning his room, but a lot of the time my father in law ends up mowing the lawn for him and my mother in law cleans him room for him! My husband wasn't given the same treatment growing up and so was taught to work for things. He was taught that if he worked for half of what something was worth, then his parents would help with the rest. I, on the other hand, had to work for EVERYTHING I ever wanted.  

I think that having to work for your things gives you a better appreciation for your things and a greater sense of value. I also think that now because of what is shown on TV especially MTV, teens think that the other kids lives shown on the shows are normal and that everyone is entitled to have expensive things. They think that if they don't have a lot of expensive things, they won't be seen as cool or popular! It's a little worrisome to me. 

Hey everyone, 

I just wanted to stop in and try to give a few of you some hope. My husband and I started trying to get pregnant about 2 years ago. The first time we got pregnant I started spotting at 8 weeks. I was scared because it wasn't slowing down or even stopping. I called my OB on Thursday and she said to either wait till Monday or to go to the emergency room. On Friday the spotting got a little worse and I decided to go to the ER. After an ultrasound and blood tests, they said that the baby didn't have a heart beat so it had died. The next day I called my OB and she gave us hope by telling us that it might be too early to see the hear beat. Sunday I misscarried. Because of the time in between the ER and Sunday, it felt like two miscarriages. It was horrible. Especially since when I had the miscarriage, we were with my in laws in Tahoe for a family event which made things incredibly awkward. Two months later we found out I was pregnant again....definitely not planned. I was disappointed because I knew that getting pregnant too soon could mean another miscarriage. At 8 weeks we had an ultrasound and there were two sacs. During the ultrasound I was watching my OB's face and she looked disappointed. We soon found out that one sac was empty but still growing and the other had a baby in it but looked like it was starting to miscarry. We had another ultrasound a week later to confirm and it showed only one sac but with no baby. I had to have a D&C. After the surgery, I was in bed in the fetal position in agony for 2 weeks. After that, we made sure that we didn't get pregnant until it was safe. The two miscarriages felt like four. I went into a depression and lost some weight. My way to cope with it was to get pregnant again.  

I am now 6 months pregnant with our first son. He is due in June and it is all so surreal. PLEASE, don't give up! It might not have been the right time, or maybe there would have been something wrong with the baby. Whatever the reason, just know that without hope and faith, nothing is possible!  

I think Dr Phil should put Ken to the test! See if he could handle the job of being 8 months pregnant with a 3 year old and a 10 month old! I think he should get one of those fake bellies that they make teens wear when they wanna have a baby (the ones that way the actual amount of the weight a pregnant woman carries) and make Ken wear it for two days. I say two days because wearing it over night will give him the full experience including the lack of sleep. So make him wear the belly while taking care of the two kids (one of which is still a baby and the other still requires so much of her parents at that age), keeping the house picked up, cleaning the house, doing the laundry, and having dinner ready for her when she gets home from work! I think he would cry out of frustration after the first few hours!  

It's hard for someone to understand and be sympathetic when it hasn't happened to them. SO MAKE IT HAPPEN TO HIM! Maybe then he'll  be more understanding and respectful to his wife who is obviously trying so hard to keep him and their family happy! 

People who keep their dog after it has committed a viscous(sp?) attack are just plain stupid! Once a dog gets a taste for blood, it WILL strike again. 

Our next door neighbors have a pit bull, one of the most well known dogs for attacking. She is very well trained and extremely gentle. She lives with a 1 year old and used to play with my two dogs all very well all the time. I had an adult miniture yorkie and a pit/lab mix puppy. My dogs and I were at my neighbors house visiting. The dogs were playing together and eating their pig ears(treats). Their pit bull finished hers first and then decided she wanted my yorkie's treat. When my tiny yorkie wouldn't give it to her, she viscously attacked my yorkie ripping her tiny torsoe apart! She killed my tiny yorkie right in front of me and my neighbors! Since then we have sold our pit/lab mix because we no longer trust pit bulls even if they are very well trained expecially since we have our own baby boy on the way. 

They still have the dog. Their son is now 1 year old and starting to walk. He is a normal baby boy who is very curious and rambunctious. When their dog killed ours, we were friends with them so we didn't press charges. But as things progressed, we figured out that keeping the dog after the dog attack was the first in a long string of very immature behavior. We are no longer friends. I am just waiting for that day when their baby boy pulls that dogs tail and she turns around and bites him in the face. It will be a horrible day, but I know it will be soon. If there was something I could do besides just telling them their dog isn't safe, I would.  

I don't understand how people can choose their dog over their child! That is rediculous! 

Well, sounds like you're having a tough time. I did too for a while. Pregnancy does limit so many things physically. I am now in my 27th week of my first pregnancy. My husband and I are a young couple who were just like you two and very active in outdoor activties and sports. It was so hard for me in the beginning and I still want to go snowboarding or go to a bbq with friends and have a drink or play bball with my husband, but the thought of that precious helpless baby inside of me helps me not to. My husband still does a lot of stuff I can't do like sports and heavy cleaning and stuff, but fortunately he got a temporary illness that made it so he can't drink for about 6 months! I lucked out. 

My advice to you is to endulge yourself! You can't do the things you used to, so pamper yourself with things you can! Instead of spending money on concerts and alcohol, go get pedicures and your nails done or a pregnancy massage! Or sign up for pregnancy yoga on Friday nights so you don't have to worry about being stuck at a party not being able to drink. Find some pregnant friends around your area and go shopping together! I no longer work so I stay at home, and if you ever want someone to talk/vent to about pregnancy I'm here! Anyways, have fun with your pregnancy! it may seem to last forever but it's really only 9 months! Well, hope I helped... 

Megan 

Maybe you didn't thoroughly read my message...I said that I too had a pit bull at one point...I said that the pit bull that attacked my yorkie was very well trained from a puppy and was the most gentle dog I had met...I never said I hated all pit bulls...the pit bull that attacked my yorkie OBVIOUSLY didn't learn that behavior and I can say without a doubt that it WAS in her nature...I said that because of this incident, I no longer trust pit bulls...I didn't say they should all die or that no one else should have them...I do think that people who want to own pit bulls shouldn't have small children around them...I never said I don't like dogs....I have a dog....My whole family owns dogs....I am not  afraid or hate dogs in general...the site you gave me was for pit bulls that had "learned" to attack and fight and from what I said, I have no idea how this could relate to my situation... 

Okay, well, I hope that cleared a few things up for you. Maybe next time, instead of jumping the gun and deciding to judge so quickly, think about what the message is trying to point out. Sorry, you missunderstood... 

Okay, I'm a little confused....Is this supposed to be sarcastic? Your dog looks like a very nice dog. Incase you missunderstood, I have a dog and do not dislike dogs in general. I love dogs, but after that incident I no longer trust pit bulls. I just want to make sure you understand that I am not afraid or hate dogs. I like them a lot, actually.