Messages By: kwindshawn

Quote From: manal_m

Hi sea how are u

I had bad days as usual my grand ma is better now thanks for asking

I feel lost in sadness, depression, and the worst feelings u can imagine

It is not a good way to began the year but I can't help it

Tell me what is going on with u

 

God bless u all 

  

Quote From: manal_m

HOW ARE YOU

IT IS ADEAL WORTH KEEPING LIKE SEA SAID

I WILL TAKE IT OF COURSE

HUGS FOR U

 

Quote From: yesyoucan

THERE are FREE training programs at State Employment Agencies in computers etc. for displaced workers and displaced homemakers. Even Medical Transcribing like what you have to know to be a moderator on Dr. Phil Website. Who I think some do from home. Here, you get to go to Richland College to participate FREE. Or, use to you did. When I was working I had to drop both my classes at college first semester, since I'm a slow reader. I think employer paid for completed courses yet meant "their" in-house company courses not at college so I dropped out during grace period where you get 100% refund. Although, I'd already realized I was in over my head. So Kudos to those gifted who can work too, like Lynn. That's tough after work to go to class especially when a slow reader like me.

Filing bankruptcy is hard from having seen my mother file once, after dad died, and my brother twice. I've seen bills twist persons I love into pretzels. I'm sorry if your courses aren't working out and you have to file bankruptcy. Yet isn't the end of the world even though feels like it as I've seen two persons survive. Sadly, record numbers are filing bankruptcy now. I guess, from how you sound, it is too late for you to withdraw with a 100% refund. Have you Googled to see if place has a record of complaints to see if any class action suits etc. or if Attorney General investigating? Some places are iffy and others just don't fit us. I've had to withdraw from college four times and is depressing. I got a C in Biology because simultaneously my first rapist husband's rapist brother was stalking me to campus so I missed last one or two tests. However, I'm proud of that C. A C grade is passing. When I dropped other three classes due to situation I should have dropped Biology yet just was enjoying course so much I didn't. Going to study lab there was a way to escape my rapist first husband's rapist brother UNTIL he began stalking me there.

Now, second time I didn't drop in time for a full refund because counselor that filled out VA Chapter 35 paperwork assured me check would come. Check did come four months later after my life had been wrecked by it being returned since went to wrong address counselor put on paperwork. I'm a bondo buggy personified with even crumbling bonding on my teeth yet I still have a parking place in life and I plan to keep it as long as I can. I may be puttering along now and then, since God don't drive no parked cars, yet even when I've been called "tortoise brain" I remember the "Tortoise and the Hare story". So here I be with everyone else here still planning on plugging along since my God given right. LOLz it just occurred to me that Dr. Phil Show is like a Dr. Phil Wrecker service and body shop to fix lives up to look like new. With lots of us saying and thinking "Thank you" and "Next, please..."

My second attempt at college, after I learned I had Chapter 35 Benefits since my father a disabled veteran, the VA counselor kindly filled out my paperwork and put wrong address so check never came. Since check never came and my rapist first husband demanded I get a job to repay him for paying my tuition. His rapist brother "nicely" called my rapist first husband offered to offer me a job. My first husband insisted I take helping build his rapist brother's house in Canton, TX. Raped me there then when he took me home ran in ahead of me and gave my first husband $80 cash for my work that day. Then, his rapist brother went to where my first husband worked and called me next day and said if I said anything he'd say I begged him and he wouldn't advise since he knew my rapist first husband had hit me in the face busting my teeth before. Well, that's my way of saying as he said his brother had hit me in face and would again after he told his side... Well, actually, it'd take less than that because both meanies and bullies and rapists. THANK GOD that's over yet due to it I rarely charge anything since I've seen first hand things can go horribly wrong.

My dad had a breakdown and Tudor and Ellis where he lived in Temple asked me to come up and my first husband asked this same brother to take me to help my dad and, his rapist brother, told my aunt and uncle he was my husband. Since he carried a shotgun in back of truck I was mute to saying otherwise that he'd hurt them and me. I truly felt I had nobody I could turn to and was use to handling things on my own since dad was a disabled veteran and to not add additional worry to my mother. Just always trying to not impose on family and handle myself.

I asked first rapist husband's rapist brother how he could do that to his brother, raping me, and he said he'd caught my first ex with two of his brothers in an unGodly act when teens so could care less about his brothers. My first rapist husband said true. Sometimes things are so stressful you are just on shock autopilot and not fully present. Some people have empathy when someone's dad is a disabled veteran and some see as an opportunity to exploit situation like my rapist first husband and his rapist brother. I was in a similar situation like Corrine...stay or die threats.

My third attempt at college, I wasn't working yet a full time job attending, again, since I'm a slow reader. Dropped next semester due to inability to commute to OKC. during winter. Plus, due to being raped by my rapist first husband's rapist brother when check Chapter 35 VA check didn't arrive, as I shared above, I preferred to have cash up front. Which is why I still haven't replaced my house as no easy task to build up that much cash. So I put college on shelf awhile. Finally, got to take three courses at where I always wanted to attend at University of Oklahoma. HOORAY!

There's a religious belief from every bad hopefully some good evolves. Even though a visiting professor at OU I was assistant to took advantage of me, sexually, devastating me since I looked up to him. He told me I was smart enough to go to OU where I always wanted to attend. So, against the odds I tried to enroll, in a why not try mood, which I thought NO WAY since I just had a GED yet (AMAZING GRACE) I was accepted. Actually, Professor was visiting OU because his family found out he'd molested his oldest daughter and he told me I reminded him of her. That's nauseating isn't it. In fact, just remembering this my office has been the bathroom. If you are holding your mouth wide open in shock...I still am. Since even my aunt and uncle didn't believe me about my rapist first husband's rapist brother exploiting me...I was silent about professor thinking nobody would believe me about that either. His credentials far better than mine. Actually, I'm certain that's why I was targeted from what I read in the book, "The Gift of Fear" as often polite persons are targeted.

Then, I took a FREE program through State Employment via JTPA similar to what I'm telling you about. The good thing about things through government, or bonus, is that employers work with them to place you. So, dream of dreams I got a wonderful job at University of Oklahoma. Short lived since mother was fired for taking off to be with me when I had surgery, a hysterectomy at 30. So, I moved to Dallas, with mom since I'd never seen mom so depressed and mother wanted to come to Dallas.

My second husband suggested I quit my job and said he'd put me through college since I was so smart. He'd had a few beers so I guess he didn't mean it so I paid for myself and dropped because a computer class and not the best instructor plus not my forte'. My second husband is a genius so thought me and not a problem with class. Could be yet my dad decided to put me through college two years later since Chapter 35 benefits had ended by then. So I enrolled again hoping I'd do better and did. Succeeding at those two classes gave me incentive to enroll again. Somewhere along the way I piecemealed a degree and graduated.

So even if you decide you want to take courses again and just take one at a time as a hobby after awhile it adds up into a degree. Did for me and my brother as we graduated the same year with honors. That's pretty good for two persons with GED's and I've only completed five to six years of school growing up since we moved so much etc. Missed 4th, 5th, 7th, 8th, 11th and 12th. My brother missed 4th, 5th, 7th, 8th, 12th. He got 10th and 11th in since lived with my paternal aunt and uncle. Beginning in 10th grade my rapist first husband began stalking me etc.

I've had lots of reasons to give up and have and all I can say is giving up is a waste of my time. When things get to me I try to remember how giving up just adds insult to injury. Yours too. Never give up on your dreams or you because SELF MATTERS INCLUDES YOU. People who mop floors are good people...if that's what you want to do. I do here. My boss, when I was an offset printer, put his way through college as a janitor. Of course didn't require a degree to mop floors like where you live in Dayton, Ohio. If not you, though, check out State Employment as have FREE current market type training programs now "and" pay for for displaced workers programs IF you apply. My favorite places to work for are colleges so check out openings there as most times not advertised as a lot of the best jobs aren't. I love City, State and Federal jobs best. There are lots of State jobs you can get substituting experience for college through the State. Oh well, I've just exchanged my hopelessness for hope because I've discovered I see more opportunities that way.

I think JTPA helped me more than college, or equally so. I had an excellent instructor, Kathy Wood I think...not sure now. I'd have to look on my certificate of completion. Anyway, we each had our own desk and homework and our tests were given to us like work assignments. She'd just walk up like our boss and say time for a spelling test and, at our desks, we'd take a spelling test. Or, time for a calculator drill or time for a typing test. You get to where easier each time. It was 8 a.m. to 5 p.m. for two or three months. When I applied at O.U. everyone was familiar with government JTPA through State Employment. There's displaced workers programs. Displaced homemakers training programs. When you are driving and come to a road block you back up and turn around to find a better route and don't drive into brick wall or spin your wheels trying to push out of the way. We all come up against brick walls in the form of people circumstances and literally. I'm still rooting for you in Dallas. Don't make me grab my pom poms...or... do because I'll root for you because I still am. Me too. We too.

REASON TO TRY
by: SEA
Inspired by Pilgrimsun

Lessons learned
Trying
Lead to successes multiplying

Quote From: lauriej

We just found out tonight my daugthers friend has lung cancer, she is 16. She already has type A lung disease, her father beats her. How much more can this kid take. My heart feels like it has been ripped out and I just feel sick. She is such a good kid, such a sweet heart.

 

I think I have to go to bed, I really don't feel good.

 

Laurie

Quote From: yesyoucan

You are right a lot of jobs are outsourced yet a lot are not too. For instance, unless is now, Dr. Phil Website doesn't outsource I don't think and one person lived in Texas. Although, I don't know if still works for Dr. Phil Website or still lives in Texas. That person posted on here once for those who want to work for websites to, at websites you frequent alot, apply to work for technical staff. However, most of us would want to work at a legitimate website like Dr. Phil or Oprah as there ARE scams everywhere so, like with so many things, you just have to research. I was offered a volunteer job as greeter on one of the websites I am a member on after there a month. I declined since my computer is contrary. Yet lo and behold, four years later I'm still online. (knock on wood (and I just did)) I'm sorry you don't like where you live. Is moving an option? It wouldn't bother me to stop by to visit you to chat if we lived in same town yet thank God we can come here to support each other and not freeze our tushes off.

I hear you on the economy. Truly, minimum wage is nothing less than legalized slavery and should be over $14 an hour now just to survive in USA. There was a time you could survive on minimum wage. Now, you'd have to work two jobs to. Twelve thousand in debt isn't great yet not the end of the world by any means. One-third in USA are in more debt and look out how Congress and our President mismanage money playing with it like it is monopoly money with ear marks and special interest agendas with the "Big Daddy" Byrd seal of approval. Airports nobody uses and freeways to nowhere in Alaska or because a Congressman is friend of a land developer in Florida. Or dump money into a tea pot museum since would be named after a Congressman. I wonder how IRS would respond if taxpayers said, "I decided to buy a collectible teapot instead of paying taxes"? That type of spending is either 1) manic spending spree or 2) criminal.

I'm glad you went to lab and got some things done and will pass. I hope some positive things begin happening for you soon. Speaking of not banking on being able to pay back school loans getting a job with degree. Probably, my quitting my job, as Lynn suggested, to return to college was not the wisest move career wise. Even the head of data entry at college who I made more than at my job as word processing specialist said, "Why did you quit that good job to return to college?" Many persons who go into work place instead of college do better than those who just go to college four years especially now since many high schools teach computers.

Due to working on 21st floor, not caring for elevators, and taking an hour to get home and to work every day, I don't miss my job downtown though. Now, my job at O.U. I miss "and" my home town. Yet that's nothing new. I'm just making the best of where I am and sometimes scared yet mostly curious where the rest of my life will take me. Truly, I am just winging it on a wing and a prayer and sometimes too feel caged yet I hope and pray I never give up because, like Maya Angelou, "I Know Why The Cage Bird Sings." Hugs and prayers and still rooting for you in Dallas. SEA