Messages By: yougtbk

Quote From: vtaggart

I was also molested as a child by my "daddy" and believe me it was not easy having to live in the same house with him all my life.  But, I still loved him in my heart.  I had a lot of mental illness from this and the Lord is the "only one" who saved me from living my life in a horrible way.

Now that is said, I believe they should visit with the grandparents, but never ever let the child and grandfather be alone.  Listen to  every word that is being said between the two.  Let the grandfather know up front that he will be watched and if he ever says or does anything toward this child that he will be punished again.  This child loves  him and it will take years before she comes to realize hate toward him.  Let her be a child.  Trust me, in time this child will heal and be able to live a normal productive life, if the family does not keep reminding the child that she was victimized.  Forgiveness can and does happen. 

If our society really cared for children, molesters would never get out of jail.  When you abuse one of God's children, there should be no second chance, it was a choice the abuser made.  But, since the grandfather is no longer in jail, then life must be as normal as possible for this little girl to heal.  She needs to know her parents will defend her and make her feel safe, even around the abuser. 

If the little girl wants to talk to her parents, they should be there for her and let her know she will be okay.  Not too much of this "your a victim" even though she is, always make her feel okay and not like "it is her fault."  How this situation is handled now while she is young is what she will carry with her for the rest of her life.  Do you want a child to believe she is a victim all her life or that something terrible happened, but by the Grace of God she doesn't have to carry this burden for life. 

If anyone grew up during the time when there was no help, we turned to God for comfort and He never failed us. 

Quote From: jacknalecsmom

I have read the message boards many times but have never felt the urge to post myself. I have to say that this show has haunted me all week, not the fact of the molestation,though it is the ultimate violation in a family. What has made me so angry that I was just sputtering during the show is the grandmother. I cannot even begin to understand how she could cover up what was going on. How do you reconcile something like that in your mind? How do you stay with someone who has violated your precious grandchild? In my mind, she is almost worse than he is. He is unarguably sick and a pedophile, but what is she?

As a mother, the thought of covering incest up to save my marriage is revolting. How can you live under the same roof and sleep in the same bed with someone capable of that? How do you justify keeping that knowledge from your son, the child's father?

My god, my first husband cheated on me and when we tried to reconcile I threw  up when he touched me and that was just infidelity. Nothing twisted and sick like what happened here.

Quote From: donsbestgirl

What is wrong with people???? I am so upset about this. These people have lost their minds. The mother seems to be the only one looking out for the welfare of GRACE!!!! Which is the victim here. Did they forget that? This little girl just lost her grandparents, she will have trust issues forever now. And the father is more concerned with loosing his parents then supporting is daughter. This is just very sad to me. These people are not the victims here. Both grandparents need to locked away from children to rot and suffer.... The grandfather for the obvious reasons and the grandmother for allowing it, not doing anyhting to help Grace and also for standing by him through all this. The father needs to pull his head out too, this is your DAUGHTER you idiot! Forget your parents and help Grace. Grace is a defenseless little girl who needs her parents more then she ever will right now and all the you can think about is loosing your father. That is a little strange to me. I would want to kill anyone that ever hurt my child, I don't care who it is. My child is my responsability and only mine, it is my job to keep him safe and healthy. If I can't who will. This is the mind set you need to have. I hope the best for Grace and thank GOD she has her mother... Prayers for Grace!

Quote From: penny_lady

Can I ask you a question?

If this was a stranger who molested this little girl, and it was the strangers wife who covered it up...do you think that Grace should get to see those people again?

Quote From: cenders

I'm so glad that others like you feel that to continue a relationship with the abuser is wrong for the victim - my adopted son(almost 14) had been abusing my 10 yr old Granddaughter and his mentally challenged twin sister for 7 years-when we finally discovered this about 6 months ago the county took our son and put him into a group home -the sexual abuse that he has been committing is horrific and he has no remorse - he has been proven to be  someone who does not have a conscience-the county wants us to reunite with this monster and bring him back into our home but I refuse -I cannot bring him back into the lives of his victims and risk further abuse -I don't know what the answer is but I do know I don't want him back!!!!When I was around 6 my great grandfather molested me and my Dad and Grandpa broke off all communication with the abuser and to this day I feel loved and protected by these two great men in my life even though they have both passed on - one of the big problems I have right now is the fact that my Husband still remains in contact with our adopted sex abuser son and it hurts his young victims to know this. Get some therapy for your Daughter but don't be surprised when this subject comes up later on in her life -it just doesn't go away no matter how it is handled.

Quote From: momisme2

Oh my God.

Did you SERIOUSLY just post that you think a child victim should be around her abuser EVEN though the abuser is a STRANGER????

Well hell!  Thats a swell idea!  How about... once the rapists and molesters get out of jail(if they have even served any time,  that is) we set up some nice little meetings at Disneyland?  Theres a plan for ya!   We can rent rooms at the Disney Hotel for these sick twists and their innocent victims so they can make nicey nice and then go hit Space Mountain for a few more thrills.

Where do we sign up for that?  I want to be first in line!  Sounds like EVER so much fun!

Quote From: demonamy2

Whoa just chill. Grace and Steve can't meet till she's 18 anyway or untill Todd says so. And if she does she will most likely be watched and it has to be her decision. If she doesn't want to then she doesn't want to if she does then she does. It's that simple.

Quote From: momisme2

Oh please.  Spare me your Bible quoting to defend and minimize!

Exactly how much of the show DID you watch?  From the very begining it spoke of how this sick woman covered up her molester/abuser husbands actions and STILL IS. 

Youre a Christian?  Did you miss the part in the Bible where Jesus spoke of the horror of hurting a child?  Of how it would be better for someone to hang a rock around their necks and drown then to hurt an innocent child?  Missed that part of your saviors teachings too, did ya? 

 Figures.

 

Quote From: demonamy2

My point exacly.

People learn from their mistakes (most of them). My dad molested me when I was 4 and has he done it again? No he hasn't because he has learned from that. And I think that Steve is one of those who will learn from this mistake.