Messages By: shelly_80

When I tuned into the show today I couldn't believe my eyes.  My jaw literally dropped in shocking disbelief that a MOTHER could do that to her children.  I've read so many posts on here from people who have been abused in one way or another and it depresses me.  My story is quite the opposite from most.  I have never one time had to deal with abuse.  However, a very dear friend of mine along with all of his siblings (one of which is my brother-in-law) were seriously abused as children.  That is why this topic affects me so much.    

I was disciplined (according to my behavior) but never abused.  Even though I dreaded every whippin' I got and deserved every one, I respect my parents so much for the way they disciplined me because it shaped into me the woman I am today.    

The couple on the show today had the sweetest children.  The mother's reasons for abusing her children had to stem from how she was treated as a child.  It's a shame that she couldn't break the cycle.  I've often wondered why people can't or won't "break the cycle"?  My first thought  was to get violently angry with her but the more I watched the more I was convinced she is sick.  Don't get me wrong, I'm not defending her.  I'm simply saying that there is something seriously wrong with her.  She needs mental help.    

I came very close to cying when Dr. Phil interviewed the kids.  It is such a bitter/sweet situaion for them because they wanted him to know how badly they're abused and wanted it to stop but at the same time they didn't want their mom to get in trouble.  That broke my heart.  To me, that says so much about them and I hope todays show will make that mother realized how wonderful her children really are.  As emotionally devistating as it is on the kids I think they need to be removed from the home until the parents can get their acts together. We all know the mom didn't stop yelling profanities and hitting the kids as soon as the dad got home from work.  So it is hard for me to believe that the dad didn't know it was happening.  I would love to see a follow-up show done with this family. 

Michelle 

Likewise I have watched numerous documentaries about the Katrina aftermath. I am a Republican from Texas about 45 minutes from the Astrodome were many of the evacuee's came after leaving the Superdome.  I have to say, I wondered if we would even have an Astrodome after "they" got finished with it. 

I am sorry but I couldn't disagree with you more.  It is NOT Bush's fault for what happened in New Orleans. Have you conveniently forgotten that he is dealing with the stresses of the WAR ON TERROR?   He can only do so much.  Mayor Ray Nagin needs to take responsibility for his people and for the turn of events.  Instead begrudging what Bush hasn't done they need to be thankful for what he has done!   And who are you to say that our Government need to get off their asses and help you're not even from America?  Until you have in some way been affected by this situation, you don't have a say in what OUR GOVERNMENT DOES OR HOW MUCH THEY DO IT OKAY!  The people of New Orleans need to get off their asses and start pitching in to rebuild instead of expecting everyone else to do it for them.  I am fed up with all of it.  No one is helping huh?  Well, FEMA has been picking up the slack for a solid year now.  Don't you think that is ample time to get somewhat back to normal?  I realize it's going to take a very long time to completely rebuid but at the same time if New Orleans' own won't pitch in (Mr. Ray Nagin) what make you think we should do it for them.  Rita hit exactly 1 month after Katrina but did you see any of them coming to help those victims --NO!  They were living high and mighty in aparments that FEMA furnished yet they were too busy crying victim that they couldn't even help those who were in the exact same situation a month later. 

Since Houston so selflessly took in those animal our crime rate has sky rocketed.  Just two weeks ago a woman was viciously murdered at the hands of some Katrina evacuee's right down the road from where my niece and nephews go to school. So don't preach to me about helping evacuee's. 

And another thing!  New Orleans wasn't the only city devistaed by Katrina.  Mississippo and part of Alabama were hit too but you don't see them whining and crying that no one is helping them.  Infact they barely even got any publicity out of the deal because of New Orleans.

I'm sorry for those who think I've come off as being too harsh but for someone who isn't even from our Country to say that our Government isn't doing enough completely makes my blood boil!!!

Is this guy for real? He's only been locked up for a few months and he's whining like a baby that he can't take it in there.  Well I've got news for him. If he's going to drink and drive he's going to have to suck it up (LIKE A MAN) and deal with the consequences of his actions.  It is plain to see that he is not a realist. Does Michael know who he's talking to?  He is very bold to even think of asking Dr. Phil to get his sentence reduced.  I am shocked that Dr. Phil didn't just burst out in laughter with a 'you have got to be kidding me' attitude.   We all know Dr. Phil is smarter than that.  Michael is crazy to think Dr. Phil would buy his lies about going to high schools and colleges to witness to kids on the same path.  Especially after only serving two months in jail.  He could n't be in a better place for a drunk!  I truly believe all drunks should be locked up.  I am so proud of the ones who have been clean and sober for so long.  I wish you all the best.

I agree 100% with you amazinggrace.  The ONLY place he can get a get out if jail free card from a Monopoly game.  Furthermore, if he really wants to be sucessful he needs to go after Boardwalk and Park Place rather than the get out of jail free card, ha ha ha

I totally agree with you about controlling teen-agers.  My Mother and Father were both raised on the "Spare the rod spoil the child" moto and they raised my sisters and I the same way.  We are now 34, 31, and 25 and we live very productive lives because we not only had both parents in the home but they always agreed on our discipline. They forever told us "If one of us says no then you better not ask the other."  We respected that because we knew the consequences. Never were we abused nor did we fear it.  We just always had a mutual respect for our parents and they did with us.  Our parents have been married 35 years.  I wish more people would realize that if they want people to respect them, they first have to respect others.  Same goes for parents and their teenage kids.  It's a two way street. 

Unfortunately we live in a very different day and time.  Young parents are clueless when it comes to raising kids. Ninety percent of the time the kids are raising the parents. If you so much as spat your child on the hand or leg in the grocery store for whatever reason and someone witnesses, they're ready to turn you in to CPS.  The thought sickens me because most CPS workers neglect and abuse their own children.  Kind of a double standard if you ask me.  Then, if you take drastic measures to control your teens it's considered absue or assault. 

As a family friend of the Ramsey's I can honestly say that sending Kim to Utah was their last resort.  They made the right choice.  Maybe not from a scarred 23 year old or a rebellious 15 year old's point of view.  But had she not gone when she did she eventually would have ended up like the first girl-pregnant.  Being sent away was her help.  See when you're a minor you don't have a choice in whether or not you get treatment.  If your parents decide it is the best option then that's where you'll go.   

Yes, her parents have to take responsibility for their part in the situation but you make it sound like it's all their fault and it isn't.  Kim needs to own up to her part too.  She isn't guiltless by any means.  So before you lay all of the blame on the parents consider "both" parties involved.

I do believe there is more than meets the eye as to why she acts the way she does but that's no ones business but theirs.  Kim has been home from treatment about a week or two and I've heard from people that have since been around her, she has made remarkable changes due to Dr. Phils treatment solutions.  She's not the person she was before the show.  And I doubt her parents are either.

I never said they did have an excuse.  Let's be realistic shall we?  If he were with them "every minute of the day" they wouldn't have a roof over their heads, a car to drive, food on the table or clothes to wear.  It 's not like he works 24/7 becuse he can't stand the turmoil at home.  He provides a good living for his family.   A man doens't work enough and he's concidered a dead beat dad, a man works hard and he's accused of neglecting his kids.  Where do you draw the line?  I remember when "a hard working man" was a good quality.  And your little spill about working less so that you can spend more time with your kids, it's a crock because my dad worked hard, long hours and he still found plenty of time to spend with us.  I nor my sisters or my mother ever felt neglected because he worked too much. 

You hit the nail right smack on the head.  THANK YOU!!!  I honestly can't see how someone could actually think that young teens are just innocent by standers in all of this.  Yes, 15 is still concidered "a child " leagally but mentally they should be cooncidered adults.  Especially ones that are capable of doing things like this. It is inexcusable what any older man does with them whether or not they "BEG" for it BUT at 15 they have already gone thru puberty and they know what sex is.  They know all about "the birds and the bees".  So to me they are just as guilty as the older man.  Hence the phrase, IT TAKES TWO TO TANGO!

Ya know, it's funny, the parents get blamed for the way their kids turn out and the men get blamed for "taking advantage" of them.  Well, what about the girls?  Why shouldn't they be held partly responsible?  Please, someone tell me!  Don't get me wrong.  I think every pervert needs to be locked up and the key thrown away, but they're not the only ones guilty in the matter.  And furthermore, it's only RAPE if the potential victim says NO!  I am well aware of the fact that it is statutory when a minor is involved but still.....