Messages By: darcylove

I guess it will take awhile for everyone to find there way back here. So far I am not a fan of this new style. I hate change sometimes! LOL

Things here have been good. Husband and I are seriously looking into the possibility of building a home in the next year. We have been watching the market for something to buy but haven't seem to find anything we like as of yet that we want to buy. We went through a house the other day but it didn't have a basement.....I really liked the house otherwise. The realitor called today and said the home owners lowered their price again. I guess they are anxious to sell.  We have so much to get done to ours before we sell. Really don't want to put it up for sale until late winter , early spring.  We are in the process currently of paneling the laundry room. From there some fresh coats of paint......and redoing the kitchen counter tops.  We also plan to put in a new furnace with central air sometime in the next few months. And a little landscaping. See....just need time yet.  I am getting anxious about the whole thing. I really like the house we are in.....but with changing schools and with this stinking community we live in.....I am willing to give up our cape cod home. :( Well hope people find us back here soon. 

I guess some discussion about porn in a relationship needs to happen sooner or later here. Was talking to some people from here online in the last couple weeks. The over all message I keep hearing....is how hard it is to move past it all ....even after the porn is gone. I guess it changes so much in a relationship....it is hard to find our way back. I get stuck with it at times.....most of the time however I seem to be so much stronger than I once was.  lately I have more upset with his mood.. ....he has been a real grouch in the last few days.....I guess we all get like that. I think he is getting worried about selling the house and buying a new one. Who can blame him? 

wow now I get to try out the reply part of this whole thing. I can't wait to see the house plans you found. I have looked at so many at this point and time i am getting sick of them! LOL  hubby and I are going out tonight so i don't know how much i will be online until later. I don't think we are staying out to late. We are going to a rib fest! Yummy! Also got to get a couple things to fix the water line to the washing maching. some hose and clamp or something.....i don't know

glad to hear you and hubby are doing well. Isn't life good when porn isn't distracting from the marriage?  have a good evening!

Hey how were the movies? As scary as you hoped?  The ribs were good. Very hot today and a good chance of storm.  We are working on the utility room still today but I may have to find something cooler to do.

Talk at you later!

Hey how were the movies? As scary as you hoped?  The ribs were good. Very hot today and a good chance of storm.  We are working on the utility room still today but I may have to find something cooler to do.

Talk at you later!

I freak out way to easy! I have never been one for a thriller and can honestly say I have not watched one since I was in my early teen years. I much more prefer a good comedy or a romantic movie. Maybe a high action movie from time to time. Are you a Harry Potter fan?  My daughter is the biggest fan. Just got her the new book. She had it all read in a day and is now reading it a second time (well she may be done with the second time through too). 

The day here is pretty boring. NOt much going on. The girls just went to do some shopping and the hubby and son are working in the utility room. I go in to help but I feel like I am getting in the way. The room isn't that big for 3 of us, all the tools and the paneling.  So....I am trying to find things to do to keep myself busy. Too hot to do too much cleaning today. I think the week is suppose to cool down about mid week. I have to work a few hours tomorrow. I am really considering puting my name in at a local factory to work for a few months because we are trying to save up a few $ for this whole house thing. I told my husband that I was going to do it.....he kind a laughed because he knows how I feel about factory work!!!  But it seems to be the only job in the area that pays anything and that is hiring. So.....I guess if I look at it as a short term thing....I can handle it.  Maybe just work through Christmas or maybe spring if I was really serious....and then get busy with building the house.

I think he has come up with a way to justify this behavior. It is like...."feel sorry for me....I have been serving in the military so can't you just grant me this one thing?"  It is great what he is doing for his country. But it is not an excuse to use porn in a marriage. I don't care if he is in Michigan, Texas, Canada, Japan, or Iraq.....he is still a married man and he needs to honor his marriage.

I saw that Dr Phil's show tomorrow is suppose to talk to a man who uses porn. I think the man in this episode is addicted to it. I think it would be good to watch it. Maybe tape it and share it with your husband. Maybe he needs to hear the message from someone else. Good luck and I wish you the best.

First welcome to the board. Usually this place is a lot busier than it is now but they just started this new style of message board (the board was gone for 3 weeks or so) so I don't think many have found their way back. But anyways...welcome!

I would be very concerned. First....if the teens he is looking at are minors....it is child porn which is illegal to make and to view. I would be paranoid too. I am not so liberal in my thinking and find that it doesn't matter if a person is liberal or more conservative......they still want some of the same things. They want security. They want to know they can trust the other person and they want to know they are loved. If my spouse was looking at teen porn.....I would definitely be angry. If he seemed to have a fasination with children being abducted and saying things like "I wonder what all that guy did to that little girl" ....I would wonder why the fascination with it.  I find that all pretty scary....pretty creepy. I am not sure what I would do....other than maybe really look into it much further. I would find out what kind of porn is being viewed. I don't like porn in a marriage at all....but to each his own. But if child porn is being viewed....I would definitely be very caution with this man....husband or not. Counseling is a good thing for many things. And I believe if you truely think the problem is as large as it sounds....I wouldn't wait.

Good luck and hope you find the answers.