Messages By: purplepenny

Quote From: groovy

Hi Julie, Penny & all my old Dr. Phil DB buddies from 6 months or so ago,

 

I've been away for awhile.  Finally (in my mid 40s) found my soulmate & moved to California to be with him.  Also I started a job that conflicted with me watching Dr. Phil, but I'm no longer working there.  Things have been going quite well, & hope all's well with you too.

 

Good suggestion for Sueann to engage in positive self-talk.  Also, there a whole genre of self esteem literature she can tap into.

 

Groovy

Quote From: ceildh1

Bullying is NOT acceptable in any way shape or form, I wanted to get that out BEFORE I was jumped on.

I know that many children are victims of bullies, that's nothing really new, its been going on since there have been school yards, and to an extent siblings ( okay how many are WILLING to step up and admit they've done it at some point ? Not many I'd bet).

Every time you sit with your own little coffee klatch and discuss your neighbours, you're a bully.  Everytime you flip the bird to a driver who cut you off, you're being a bully, Everytime you yell at your spouse or children, guess what you're being a bully, and any time you slap or spank your child you're being a bully, not to mention those of you (start blushing now) who yell at a cashier, or sales person for something stupid, guess what, you ARE BEING A BULLY!  So what in the WORLD do you expect kids to be when they see us as ADULTS doing the SAME THING!

I wish Dr. Phil explored WHY children Bully others, its the only way they know to show their anger, they have never been taught any better ways, why, well how is anger handled at home ?  Is there intimidation, yelling, hitting ?  Would you call a grown woman dealing with that a "BRAT", no we would call her a victim.

All I'm saying is, this kid had a rough go, yeah I know after all she is 15 and well she KNOWS better, a 14 prostituting herself is a victim of her upbringing though , did I get that right?  Yes I am defending her, because a child does not start to bully others for no reason, and I wonder why that Principal found it so shocking ?

That girl should be GRATEFUL for having her Grandmother for an advocate, you see, bullies aren't stupid, they know the facade to use at home and around other adults, but at least her grandmother is WILLING to get her the help she needs, and not hiding behind "my little Jenny/ Johnny wouldn't do that ."  So obviously the school didn't know, or she was never told and I'm sorry you cannot correct it if you don't know.  A bully won't do anything on school grounds, and if they do it will NOT be where any adult can see them.

I do agree that those who stand around and watch are just as guilty, so to the adults, think about that the next time you see someone give a cashier a hard time, or the next time your friends start gossiping, or the next time you feel the need to scream at your spouse or hit your children, maybe you could step back and help STOP the cycle yourself.

Quote From: ceildh1

I agree with you, it dosen't matter to me male, female, tall , short whatever, I mean who really wants the door to be shut in their face.

Though I will say Penny I read your responses first, and yes no matter the motives, I just say thanks, personally to me its like a walk in the woods with a group, would you snap that branch back in the other person's face ?  God, I hope not, but the amount of times I've heard thanks for holding the door, is sadly declining, I mean how much effort does it take really ?

Quote From: juliebgg

I couldn't believe how many posts are about doors.  Personally, I think it is great when someone holds the door open for another person.  I do not, and have never interpreted a man holding a door open for me as being condescending because I am female.  I don't look at it as if he sees me as a helpless individual.  It is a polite gesture and the world needs alot more of that. Some people are touchy about such silly things.  Why anyone would get mad at someone who holds a door for them is beyond me. 

Quote From: juliebgg

Why do you get angry over such a little thing?  And why so defensive in your post?  So what if he did it because you are a female......it is a nice gesture and it is silly to get angry about it for any reason IMO.

Quote From: jade4953

Simply stating that transgender surgery should be approached in steps is not worthy of your anger.  I think you should stop and think about the entire subject, not YOUR personal experience.  Many young people go through varies stages of maturity.  Making decisions at a young age can sometimes prove problematic.

 

I think your reference to my relationship is clearly not appropriate, rude and none of your business. 

 

It is people like you that make controversy in the discussion of sensative issues.

 

I hope you have a horrible day. 

Quote From: jsg262003

u there?

Quote From: gwarrior6

I'm just curious as to why the motive isn't nice...is it a sexist thing, or devaluation of feminine strength, or what (fill in the blank).

 

How do you know someone's motives?  I think for a lot of people it's an automatic thing they don't really think about.  An occasional few will do it for the gratification/validation they get from you to superglue their ego together to hide the fact that they're really steeped in insecurity by making you feel like the weaker sex....IDK....I know that's a loaded question, but what else do you expect from me lately? LOL!!!

Quote From: tripmom2

 

Hi, I am a mom of 5 children.  My oldest is a nine year old boy, then seven year old triplets and lastly but not least a 10 month old girl.  After I watched "ask the expert "show I felt like I miss parented my children, especially my triplet boys.  The doctors on the panel, Dr. Sears and family were very informative but their advice on never to let your baby cry would have made me feel helpless and totally out of control when my boys were babies.  In the case of my triplets, someone was always crying.  They weren't neglected. It was just they had to take turns in everything.  When it was naptime or bedtime I couldn't cuddle them til they fell asleep.  I had to put them in their crib, touch them, console them  and then leave so they learned how to fall asleep on their own.  They cried, but as long as I knew they were fed, changed and not sick I had to believe they were ok.  At first, before I did this routine they were all in bed with me including my oldest and my husband and I were falling out of bed. Then we tried rocking my babies til they fell asleep.  That took close to 2 hours every nap and bedtime.  It was insane and we had had enough.  I had to teach my oldest (then 2years old) to stay in his own bed and he cried.  It tore my heart out but I knew that in a week or so it will be much calmer at bedtime.  Teaching my children to be able to fall asleep on their own was one of the most difficult things my husband and I had to do but today when it is bedtime, in a 15 mins. they are all asleep.  Dr. Sears and his sons had one point of view with this issue, but I am sure that there are reputable excellent doctors that don't have this viewpoint.  I would be interested to see a follow up show on parenting with a different viewpoint.  I'm always eager to learn more.  Thank-you