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Messages By: lovebug8

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sad
September 19, 2006, 7:41 pm CDT

What's wrong?

I love sex.  That was no secret when we got married.  When we were dating he mentioned he liked it when I asked to do it or initiate sex.  Now I mention sex he roles over and tucks his privates between his legs.  Don't get me wrong we have sex, when he wants to.  About once a week...sometimes less.  It just hurts my feelings and well sex sucks.
 
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upset
September 24, 2006, 7:19 pm CDT

hmmm

Quote From: westmoneypit

Find out what is going on.  You need him to open up.  Maybe he is stressed?  Maybe unhappy about something?  Read my reply about communicating a few replies ago.  Learn how to communicate and learn "how to fight".  Getting things in front of both of you and dealing with them is the best form of passion.  Plan some alone time.  Use the one response about the candles, roses, bedroom set up mentioned before.  But, as you can see by her response as well, talking about each other's needs and issues, understanding the issues, dealing with them by comprise, and then getting over it and moving on are the keys to great love and sex.  You are both missing the emotional love more than the physical.  Try something new and exciting.  Dress up, role play, change atmospheres, get a hotel room, if one of you is interested, things will work out. 

Try to stroke his intellect.  Men need ego boosts.  Our ego is very easily hurt.  Hold his hand in public out of the blue.  Give him a kiss for no reason.  Compliment him.  Tell him how thankful you are for what he provides you and the family.  Men that feel like they are real men, worry about everything (money, whether the family is happy, whether they are doing a good job at work)  You will be surprised that he will start returning compliments as well.  That makes you closer and lends to a more passionate relationship and therefore, more sex.  Hope this helps.

I agree with you and I have tried that..he just isn't intereseted in sex any more.  It is like we are good friends that have intercourse every so often.  I enjoy the friendship!  But I want more..I had guy friends before we met.  I have tried new things for him..when he rolls over once every7-10 mornings any decides he wants a ride i give him what he wants and now..when I want to he says he is tired and not in the mood.  When I tell him how I feel he really just doen't care or he disagrees.  I want romance I want lust i love him the same and feel the same way sexually about him as I always have.  I get mixed signal and frankly I want MORE affection and that is how I show affectio.
 

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