Messages By: sassie1

I'm the father of the 'Gracie' participating in Dr. Phil's 'Make My Kid a Star' with her mother, Kiki.  First, I want to thank Gracie's mother for her courage to be on this show when she knew going into the project that Dr. Phil and his producers were likely looking to uncover more than just whose kid might have what it takes to 'be a star'.  She and her husband and I discussed the issue at length, but, decided in the final analysis that Gracie understood all sides of this opportunity, including the risks involved that things could go badly or that we might learn some things about ourselves that would be difficult to learn in front a few million of Dr. Phil's viewers.

Really, it was simply our belief in Gracie and our confidence that we were honestly supporting HER dreams and not vice versa that gave us enough of a comfort level to do this show.  Again, the parental credit all goes to Kiki and I couldn't be more pround of her.  Of course, none of us have seen the show so there could very well be plenty of footage that'll make us all blush or worse, but, we're all very excited about the show and ready to learn some lessons that will only build on the insights that  Gracie and Kiki learned during the actual taping of the show.

Like any loving and rational parent, I love my kids regardless of their objective level of talent or ambition.  My and Kiki's son, Warren, is perfectly content to live with me in a town of 400 people in rural Kentucky, perform in school plays, hang out with his friends and be his Dad's best friend.  Like most siblings, Gracie's different.  She has a very singular ambition of becoming a working actress in Hollywood.

I don't find anything wrong with either vision.  Our kids are individuals and they've chosen individual paths in life, as you'd expect.  For both of them, their mother and I along with their very large extended family support system have guided them with a couple of very simple principles:

1. You can do or be anything you desire.  No dream is too big and no ambition is too grand.  The only true limitation in life is your belief.  If you believe you can -- you can!  If you believe you can't -- then you can't.

2. Life is a journey and not a destination!  Whatever your dreams may be, never forget that happiness comes from the joy of becoming and from the adventures along the way.  If you embrace the adventure of getting there, then the ultimate destination will never matter too much.

We hope these principles come through over the course of Dr. Phil's 3 day special.  Either way, I know that my daughter is a very loving, kind, generous, thoughtful and talented young woman and that she'd got the best mom a girl could ever hope to have to guide her along life's pathways!

Sincerely,

Gracie's Dad (...and Warren's too!)

I wonder if her mom has passed on? I wonder why her  dad think she lies and steales?

In our defense, I would just like to inform you all that my parents do not drink very often. Before being on that show, the last time my father drank was a year before when he went out to karaoke with my mother. I spoke with the producers and the reason they showed the alcohol was to show that this environment and the situation was so stressful that anyone in it would need a drink. I would like to see all of you being put in a house with cameras everywhere capturing your every move. IT IS NERVE RAKING...trust me. We do not allow alcohol in our home and the reason it was there is because they put food in the fridge prior to us arriving and it just so happens that they included alcohol, (as does every reality show). Everyone needs to seriously calm down because I am sure that most of you on the site have taken at least one drink in your day. Alcohol is not an issue in this show and it will not be shown on the show anymore....

Melissa has a son that was born with autism. Her boyfriend isn't Prince Charming. She's "bored and has nothing to do all day but watch tv". She can't get a job.....  I saw how she acted in the Dr.Phil house yesterday. As Dr.Phil said, the only time she moved at all was to get something to eat. We all have problems. Many of us a lot worse than hers. Sitting and eating all day long every day is not going to turn your child into a healthy perfect child. It's not going to get you a decent boyfriend and it's sure as heck not going to get you a job or help you get a better education. If you want a decent boyfriend, dump your old one and go and find someone decent. If you want a job, go and look for one. If you're depressed go to a psychiatrist and get help for it. Don't sit there and complain and holler about how life is so God awful that all you can do is sit and eat. Get off your butt and do something about it. The Lord helps those who help themselves. Smarten up.

In fact, she inspired me to write to Dr. Phil about my own problem(s) today:

I've written quite a few times about one family crisis or another, but now this is my final email.  It's not about and it's all about  those things I've previously written about.  I'm just so depressed about my life and spent the last few days crying when no one is looking. I have a great personality and sense of humor which covers up my real feelings and I'm tired of pretending. I'm now 50 years old and wonder "is this all there is?". I've made wrong choices in men and have 3 children who have paid the consequences of my choices. My weight is also a symptom of those choices. I'm a mess and don't know how to truly change things for the better. I have one daughter from the first husband, age 30 on meth, I have one son, age 18 who was on meds since age 4 and whose father died from drugs and paternal grandparents brainwashing him that I don't care about him. He's moved out with those grandparents just a few weeks ago. I have another son, age 12, who is the love of my life and whose father is my current husband who is another bad choice. He's a good provider, but is absent emotionally from us. I pretend I'm happy, I shop to make myself happy, I eat to make myself happy. I'm NOT happy. I want another life. I want my daughter to know I love her and get off meth, I want my son (even tho he's not a very nice person to me) to know I love him and have always cared about him, I want my youngest to know that I'm a good Mom and I care about ALL my kids.  My Dad cheated on my Mom when I was a kid and they got divorced. I was devastated by my first real boyfriend when he broke up with me, then the 2nd boy in high school who I still love to this very day, broke up with me and then I chose my first husband just for companionship. There hasn't been love involved in my relationships since I was 18. Drugs and alcohol were involved in my first 2 adult relationships, so now I have a husband who doesn't drink or drug but isn't there for me or the kids. He's extremely judgemental and has pushed my 18 year old away since he's been 4 years old. I want a home, a husband who loves me and who really truly cares about me and is my friend. I NEED a friend. I'm tired of choosing men who are beneath me just so that I don't have to worry that they'll leave me. They're not good enough for me, but I feel that I'm not good enough for the one's who could be good enough for me. Oh Dr. Phil, please help me sort this all out. I don't want to grow old and die unhappy and feeling cheated in life.

Ya know, there's a lot more to someone's problems than what you see on the TV screen on the show.  Melissa has issues that cause her to feel sad and depressed.  In turn, she eats and pretends to hold everything together.  She needs to get honest with herself and not worry about hurting anyone's feelings now that she's able to talk to Dr. Phil.  He's going to be her lifeline to changing her life.  Like Melissa, I feel that I also have many issues that span many years of heartache.  I *do* acknowledge it, but still don't know how to change it.  I'm overwhelmed and not sure what to do first.  So, I just go on with normal day to day activities and stuff my feelings.  Sometimes, like during the show, all my issues come to a head and I cry and cry, but still I don't know what to do.  Sure, I could go to a therapist, but I want help NOW, not months and months from now after going from session to session. I don't mind going, but I need a gameplan. Every therapist I've ever gone to was too wishy-washy. I know Dr. Phil wouldn't be like that. I need him before everything comes crashing down on me. I feel it.