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Messages By: donohue1

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February 21, 2008, 7:51 am PST

You Are not Alone

Quote From: celticeme

I have tried to write this post more times then I can count. Each time I delete it and walk away. The words haven't come easy for me. I met someone who i loved dearly and very much. She was the light of my life. I was preparing for the moment when I told my mom I was in love with another woman. I knew that it would mean being disowned. The relationship had problems. Okay that is an understatement. She told me I was too woe woe is me, I was too much work, that I thought everything was a game, that I thought she was nothing but entertainment. None of which was true. She blamed it all on me always. She was controlling with possible stalking involved on the net. I was never good enough. Another our friends entered the fray and when I mentioned that I was considering heavily going inpatient she said only people who are hiding from personal issues go into the hospital. I was trying to keep me safe from me. To get the meds straightened out as well as trying to find a way out of the maze I was in. The DID was getting out of control. The PTSD was out of this world to the point that answering the phone or door was impossible. Every single noise got to me. It still does. During this time I had a friend threaten to kill herself. I tried to talk to her and to send help to her. I didn't hear from her for over a week. I checked the obits from her area and was relieved to see she was not listed. I finally just heard from her. I am sure you can imagine the emotional turmoil I felt. I feel lost in the maze in my head without a door. No I am not asking for a door or anyone to hand me a map. I must find it myself. I am tired of dealing with this stuff alone. My family still doesn't know or understand. They are mostly concerned with themselves at this point. I know here I can vent and let it go. Or at least get the ball rolling to do that. Thanks for letting me get this off my chest.

Deb

Deb be true to yourself. The right words to a complicated situation are never easy to Explain.  You have the right to love whomever you desire, its your life and not anyones place to dictate how you should live it. 

Mabe this lady wasn't your soulmate, sounds like she was pretty one sided. Remeber the right one is out there looking for you right now.

 

Going to the hospital is not a way  to hide from your your personal issues, It's  because you are stonger than you think. You are smart enough the you know you may need help. 

 

Deb reach out hear and there, You are not alone, even tho you feel like your lost in the crowd. You must be honest with your doctor if no one else.

 

Deb my thoughts are with you I hope it was not offending

 

 

The Boy

 
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February 21, 2008, 7:34 pm PST

Bipolar Disorder

Power Corrupts, Absolute Power Corrupts Absolutely

 

 

Lady Justice We The People, are tired of living in the animal farm, and in constant fear.  Government was formed to represent us, inform us, guide us, help, us, protect us, help us to uphold your laws and constitutions weather they are right or wrong.  Ordinary humans wrote your laws. Upheld and broken by the same hands.  Also amended by those hands!!!

Religion is written in the heavens, yet it is the root of all-evil? Why? The Secret unfolds, as simple as the answer to pie? As simple as a game of dominos?

 

Lady Justice I challenge you, and everything you stand for.  We the people declare war on you, Only, to show you peace and mercy. It is time for you to take the blindfolds off, Look at the world, and our society and protect us. Guide us before it is too late, before all is forgotten.  I’m making this plea on behalf of those who cannot speak those who are lost in the heard, living life through deaf eyes. 

 

Can you protect us, or simply condemn us. What is your role?

 

 

My claim is simple. I sue you for your crimes in the amount of $10.00. Lame Ehh??

 

Per person Currently living under your jurisdiction.  Proceeds to be received only when the individual gives and honest opinion on how the law should be and is the government that dictates our quality of life.

 

These thoughts are the beginning to my theses; the rest will be disclosed in a court of law. Please prepare for a lenthly battle, we the people will not falter, we will not tire, we will stand united not untied.

 

 

 

Show Us The Way

 

The Boy

War On Terror

War on New World Order

S.O.S  …---…    …---…  …---…

 

 
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February 21, 2008, 7:49 pm PST

Bipolar Disorder

I’m in complete distress. I can’t qiuet the voices ringing in my head.  I’m able to trick everyone into beliving I’m O.K. But in reality I fear I’m losing my battle. I’m experiencing extreme memory lose. Mixed rage/joy. The constant pain is unbearable. The crahes are more frequent and more severe. I feel the wals are closing in on me, I’m smothering and can’t breath. I’m afraid that I may not be able to control myself. Where do I turn. Who in reaily could help me overcome the restlessness. I know a devastating secret, something terrible is going to happen. I even know when and how I jut know it is impossible to stop.  This will make 9 11 look like a walk in the park.

 

 

My heart is pounding so loud I can smell it. Hear right know I am not in con troll of hese keys in fact I am now writing thi in te dark blind folded. I’m at one with my mind body and soul. I feel the preeanceof so many voices that its hard to keep my train of thought. They are guiding me trough this as I’m writoing thee thoughts so I can undrtsand my self later. Last time I wa in this place It pued e over the edge now it feels so embracing that mabe there is a message I was to deliver, a meassage from beyond.

 

I had a near death experience. It was overwhelmoing words cannt explain. Ever since this experience I feel Ive been cursed. I’m no longer walking around with a blind fold my eyes are wide open. I see the meassages al around us. Our world as we know it will cease to exist as we know it. Weather it a plague, A nucluear bomb, climate change, or simply you daugerter getting raped, or your som getting murderded or your dog getting hit by a car. Our world could shatter in an intante. Unforuntaly it dos not ake much, mostly what I hear right now are whispers and they are mad they say we are forgetting our history and we are the omputers theat is destroying the well being of life.  My dad is siting right next to e right know, he is who picks me off the floor when I hit bottom, He saying Why? And hes telling me to listen to my hatrt  the song my son passed to me the day of my beakdown is playbg so loud rith know its deafning. Imagine all the people living for today. Imagine theres no nations its not that hard to do  Im being told that we can do something about it that remember the snowflake theory. Now love can move mountinas.  How secure id te quilty of life how can we protect it how can we protect ourselfes. Simple learn about the ark. Act of random kindness. 1 in five people suffer from bipolar disorder that aprox 20 % of the popolutaion. 80 % of the poploution is affected in tsome way to thi ever rising epedimenct. What if we look at things a little differently and said there is 4 out of 5 able to help and support our fellow brothers and sisters by way of the ark. We have the power to create history not change it. My meaning is I stanf herare before you in the dark with a blind fold typing in the comutoer knowing I have the abitly to make a stand against every government and the entire justice sysem and ay hey M justice its time to take off the blind fold. Look aqt this ever changing world /socity and take a stand. If you lady justice are not willing to look u into the eyses than everything is for nothing. evry thing we stand united for can easily be unspelled as untied. It is time to tie our shoelaces and beging to walk. Don’t worry lady jutice we will be herer if you fall.

I’m calling you out lady justice to create a safe envoirment for we the people. I beg of you for the opputuntiy of the pursitu of happiness. What happened to all for one ad one for all. United we stand divided we fall . There is a light shining bright at the end of the tunnel thanks to john lennon’s peace towerer yoko john says peace be with us this is there. He aid you would know what that means. I have to stop wrintinf for know the emotions are just to overwhelming my heat crys a river of blood.

 
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February 21, 2008, 8:53 pm PST

Bipolar Disorder

Win, Lose, Or Draw. What if we had the power to bring our troops home?  What if we could stop the nonesense? Could we stand together? Must we always break the laws we enforce?

 

 

 

Least we Forget

 

 

Flounders fields?

 
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February 22, 2008, 9:48 am PST

Untied/ Untied

Bipolar Disorder

Power Corrupts, Absolute Power Corrupts Absolutely

 

 

Lady Justice We The People, are tired of living in the animal farm, and in constant fear.  Government was formed to represent us, inform us, guide us, help, us, protect us, help us to uphold your laws and constitutions weather they are right or wrong.  Ordinary humans wrote your laws. Upheld and broken by the same hands.  Also amended by those hands!!!

Religion is written in the heavens, yet it is the root of all-evil? Why? The Secret unfolds, as simple as the answer to pie? As simple as a game of dominos?

 

Lady Justice I challenge you, and everything you stand for.  We the people declare war on you, Only, to show you peace and mercy. It is time for you to take the blindfolds off, Look at the world, and our society and protect us. Guide us before it is too late, before all is forgotten.  I’m making this plea on behalf of those who cannot speak those who are lost in the heard, living life through deaf eyes. 

 

Can you protect us, or simply condemn us. What is your role?

 

 

My claim is simple. I sue you for your crimes in the amount of $10.00. Lame Ehh??

 

Per person Currently living under your jurisdiction.  Proceeds to be received only when the individual gives and honest opinion on how the law should be and is the government that dictates our quality of life.

 

These thoughts are the beginning to my theses; the rest will be disclosed in a court of law. Please prepare for a lenthly battle, we the people will not falter, we will not tire, we will stand united not untied.

 

 

 

Show Us The Way

 

The Boy

War On Terror

War on New World Order

S.O.S  …---…    …---…  …---…

 
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May 13, 2008, 4:45 pm PDT

Love Your Art

Quote From: mustbecrazy

Hello to all...I've finished my latest work of art...a dog...painted on a rock...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

same rock...different view

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

This rock is for our son's teacher.  It is a golden retriever.  The dog was special to our son's teacher because it was her son's dog, and her son was killed in an accident.  The dog died last year...

 

And, it is spring here....

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

That is a robin roosting in our flowering ornamental apple tree...it is in full bloom...

 

I hope that everybody is OK...the board has been quiet for a few days...my meds are holding me OK for the most part...Becky

Becky

 

Long Time Since I've Visited. How is everyone, old and new posters. Hope you are finding your way to where ever you need to go.  I Celebreted my 2nd year anniversity may 8th of my breakdown. I cherrish every day more than the last. Sounds cookey, even though I've had an intense few months. My headaches are back and the pain is unbearable. Every time I go to the hospital for help they put me in crises, and then let me go with out any help. They are willing to hospitaize me for bipolar, but they do nohing for the pain I'm in.  It will be 2 years this august med free, I know there is a pill out there for me but I can not take a chance because they failed me. My health care system. O Canada?

 

I found a freind whom suffers Bipolar, it is sure nice to have a real person to talk to about stuff that "they" dnt understand. 

 

Lithuim i what they want me to start to take. I was on it before and wow I bottomed out. i later found out that you need regular blood tests to check the levels of lithim in your system and that is what is responsible for the amount you need to be on. Once a week until they getit under cntrol and thn once a month to keepa close eye.

 

Did yu know that to much or not enough ituim can be devestaing to your system. to much you can flat line feel nothing a walking talking zombie, also yur kidneys can start to shut down, so all yu guys on lituim please get the facts get your blood checked often and be well

 

Gotta go hope I hcome back soon

 

 

The Boy

 

S.O.S ...---... 

 

 

 
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July 14, 2008, 7:53 pm PDT

Hows Everyone Coping

I’m here. I’m ready willing and able. But I’m nothing more than a snowflake, one of many whom believe in the Snowflake Theory”.  Ever watch a snowstorm? Billions of snowflakes perish before they over come the land.  When the storm subsides “We The
People” deal with the effects, first the beauty it creates, second the misery it mostly causes. The most amazing aspect is, it all started from a single snowflake.

 

Unfortunately my first post may not mean a thing to you, or it could explain everything. Can you read between the lines? Are you willing to look yourself in the mirror and be judged for all that is wrong in and around your world?  If not than don’t Judge or pass blame. I did. I lost my self. It took years to rediscover myself, I still feel lost, alone, and tired. I’m like a prisoner of war only my wars are silent, and they rest within my head.  What terrifies me is that all this plays out for me constantly daily.

 

 

As I broke I repeated one thing over and over. “If you want me to be the voice of everyone, I must first be the voice of no one”. As the voice of no one I’m here typing in my computer trying not to over step the boundaries, Laws, or like most people the guidelines to which “We The People” live.

 

I call out to all, Mostly the deaf, as they hear the most. Help me on my quest. We could be nothing more than a few snowflakes but if there are enough of us “We The People” can and will make a difference. My first question would read as follows;

1.What is life going to like after climate change? 2.Are we “The People” prepared for living conditions that our world has to offer after global warming reaches its most critical points? 3. Is the climate going to drive us back to the stone ages? 4. Could all of the progress we achieved over time be simply lost in history, or lost in translation?  5. Can

“We The People” overcome all odds? The answer is as simple as pie. 6. I just don’t know if we the human race are ready for the answer to pie? 7. Do you remember what happened when someone learned how to split an atom???

 

 

I’m trying not to write a novel here but I think this sets my stage. And the world is my audience.

 

 

I’m stuck between two worlds. As the “Boy” with a dream, and the “Man on a mission.

When Worlds Collide!!! As Arnold would say I’ll be Back!!!  

Is this pen mightier than the sword??? Hmmm I’m Waiting!!! I’m waiting on a world to change. Imagine, a message in a bottle, would you stand by me, all I am saying is give peace a change. Take this sad song and make it better. 

 

 

 

The Boy  

S.O.S    …---…    …---…    …---…   …---…   …---…   S.O.S.     “We The People”

 

 
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October 8, 2008, 7:23 pm PDT

The Boy A.K.A. John HanCock

Quote From: ibrown28

I ASM BLANK IN MY THOGHTS THAT THE WORLD OF OTHERS IN THE SUFFERING CIRCLE OF BI POLAR  WITH SOME QUESTION OF MULTIBLE PERSONALITIES  CAN NOT RELATE TO THIS POEM ENOUGH TO COMMENT. WHICH WAY IS UP TODAY??? WHICH WAY IS DOWN??? WHO JUST ANSWERED FOR YOU?? YOUE ULTRA EGO OR YOUR PASSIVE PERSONALITIY??? ARE YOU APOLOGIZING FOR YOU RUDE ,CURT REPLY ....IF IT APPLIES??  HOW MANY PEOPLE TRUELY EXPERIENCED THE SYMPTOMS OR HAVE READ ABOUT THEM??? THIS IS A GUEST ON THIS PAGE MY NICKNAME IS DRE (REAL NAME IS aUDREY) i AM BI POLAR AND SUFFER FROM MULTIBLE PERSONALITIES. i AM FOR THE MOST PART AN INTERVERT BUT MANAGE TO FUNCTION ENOUGH TO SURVIVE A NORMAL MINIMAL AMOUNT OF DUTIES TO RUN A HOUSEHOLD.....I HAVE LITTLAEACCAINTANCES. TRUSTING BASICALLY NO ONE.  I AM JUST CONCERNED ABOUT WHO HAS INTEREST IN THE FUTER OF MENAL HEATH INDIVIDUALS SITUATIONS..

     It has been along time since my last Post, Here are my Sins, My three L's Code five, Live,Love, ? Life!

I also post on other varous Boards, The Boy, Jimmy Gets High, You Think I'm Crazy, My personal Favorite John HankCock.  P.O.W. Of The Mind, You Pick Me, You Sea the trust in the true North,

 

 

My Tribute To Peace Keepers "Way". Its as easy as 125 the Stretch of highway starting right On My doorstep along the transCanada Highway, up to Sydney Mines. My tribute To My World War Two Veteran Dad. I will walk that day. Approx 16-18kms.  With nothing more than my Heart, as Lightning strike me dead Dad Kyle Shall Be The One Dad, Your Grandson that shall lead My "Way", I shall Show them the "Way" My "Way" Our "WAY"

November 11th, 2008.  10:30 We will Be Thier At The remembering the Beginning, The Offical Opening Of The  Begining Of "THE WAY"  When the Sacred Bell Thwacks 11:00 We Shall Savor Our/Your  Moment Of Silence And Remember you our/your  fallen Mothers and Fathers Brothers And Sisters, and so ther forth!. , Where ever we shall be, And Remember!!! What We the people Shall Not only Leave Span From Sea To Shining Sea But To The impossible and thier it shall be, We Shall Be The Ones Whom Shall Provide The Missig Link To Do The Impossible And Span The "Way"  Striaght Of "Way" World Wide, Most Defenitaly, To My Fallen Comrades, 911, At My true Ground Zero, My true Stand, To The Smelt Fisherman that visits True North from time to time.

 

 

Thy hold only to thyself And Everthing Democracy 250 and peace Keepers Way Has To Offer  I, My People, Your People, Our People, And The People Shall Walk. If You can not make our first walk Our First , as it shall no be thy last?  Shall only be a Baby Step, Marking The True Connection Of Our "Trans Canada Highway 125  True Confederation. Democracy 250. My Tribute To my father whom shall walk with me this day, standing proud. The Beginning Of Peace Keepers Way, I'm Sure We The People, Citizens of The True Order Of Candada, Shall Show Them The 'Way". as I know you shall be there helping me throught the foot prints. I must endow. Lost In Translation

 

 

The Boy

S.O.S.   May Day. 

 

 

 
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March 3, 2009, 9:16 am PST

coping

I spend so much time hiding whats really going on inside, sometimes I wonder whom I'm trying to fool. My Self, or them. I watch how my depressions and or mania effect my wife and 4 small children. I sometimes believe they would be better off without me, as it is getting harder each day to cope with this disorder.

It will be my 3rd year this may since I was diagnosed with this curse.  Hard to explain it but its like everything works but me, my mind is my greatest foe, I can not run hide or escape it. They try to pump me up full of the meds, and only makes it worse.  Which leaves me no where to turn.

I feel for those whom are seeing a loved one go through this mess, as it seems to just get easier not better. Any of the old crew still posting, or reading if so God Bless and take care


The Boy
 

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