Messages By: christab

Quote From: singlemomieof4

When I first saw the story about the 3 year old girl, I cried.....It hurts me as a mother, to see and hear these awful things that happen with innocent little children.

 

It reminds me when I was molested as a child.  I was scared of telling my mother. My father had threatened me and I was very terrified of him because he was a big man. I was a very shy and quiet little girl and did not know what to do.

 

When I was in 5th grade I finally got enough courage to write my teacher a letter. Monday morning came, and people were waiting for me in the office. My mom had accused me of lying, I felt so helpless. When we went to court, my mother told me to write a letter and tell the judge, that I didnt want my dad to go to jail.

 

So long story short.....My father did not go to jail.....and he was able to continue what he had started:(

 

Years went by and my father still tried to do little things.  When I told my older sister what he was doing, She felt so guilty for not protecting me, when we were little. And after so many years, she confessed to me, that my father had done the same to her, but worse. He was having sex with her, and she was just a little girl.  And now, I have so much hatred towards my mother, for not protecting us. It's weird cause most of my hatred is towards my mother, instead of my father. I trusted my mother to protect me and instead, I felt as though she was just handing us over to him.

 

Now I have four children and protect them as much as I can. I would hate for them to go through what I went through.

 

I worry about my littliest one, who is 1 years old. Her father is someone I do not trust. Right now, he has supervised visits. But next year, he will be able to take her with him and I am horrified that he may do to her, what Chester Stiles did to the 3 year old girl.

 

My baby's father has gone out with a 13 year old girl.....he was having sex with his niece.......and now he has had sex with his 30+year old sister and I just feel it in my gut, that this guy will do something to my daughter.  The supervised visits will end next year and I am so scared of leaving my baby alone with her father.  I DO NOT TRUST HIM AT ALL !

 

This guy does not having any molestation charges or anything like that against him, BUT

CAN HE BE A SEXUAL PREDATOR?

Quote From: kat3633

Thank you for sending a response to my post but I believe you are wrong in your statement that Mia IS NOT an outsider.

 

I have been a paralegal for 15+ years, working primarily in family law, and I think I've just about seen/heard it all.

 

I'm sorry but Mia's only standing, as far as our courts here are concerned, is that of Enrique's wife.  She has no right or standing in custody or any other matters involving Enrique's parent/child relationship, either with his daughters OR his ex-wife. She's nothing but a trouble maker, but hey, that's just my opinion...

 

Over the years I have known only two men in a similar situation.  They had been paying child support for years for a child BORN OUT OF WEDLOCK to an ex-girlfriend.  Years later they found out, by whatever means, that the child wasn't their biological child.  They called our office because domestic relations refused to cancel their child support obligation.  The  first question I had was: "Why didn't you ask for a paternity test as soon as the mother filed for child support, when the child was born?"  I received vary vague answers to that question.  My point in making the statement regarding paternity testing is "when in doubt, check it out".  In other words, ASK FOR A PATERNITY TEST AS SOON AS THE CHILD IS BORN, OR THE MINUTE THE MOTHER FILES FOR SUPPORT, DON'T WAIT MONTHS/YEARS AND WONDER!  On the very first DAY of a support hearing, if a punitive father DOESN'T request a paternity test and just agrees to pay, the court PRESUMES that this person admits paternity and that's the way it will stay.  That is how the assumption of paternity is made by the courts in the first place.  I feel sorry for them, but...

 

In addition, in making the statement regarding paternity testing, I am NOT referring to children born OF A MARRIAGE, I only refer to children born OUT OF WEDLOCK.  Married people don't take each other to court for child support unless they separate.  Even then, a married father cannot question paternity. 

 

I was involved in two cases where men filed for custody of a child born of an adulterous relationship. In both cases the mother (adulterer) was still married and cohabitating with her spouse.  The court refused to hear both of those cases because the cheated on SPOUSE refused to CONCEDE PATERNITY OF THE CHILD regardless.  They are the true heros in my book.

 

BTW I, personally, have never been involved in a case where a married man separated from his spouse and THEN requested a paternity test.

 

 

 

Quote From: gem714

 

"Regardless, of what you think about Hillary, her husband adores her and she is who he answers to now. " 

 

He "answers to her now"...hmmm..... sounds like an extremely dysfunctional dynamic to me. 

 

 

Quote From: bulldogs03

I agree that Mia does not seem like she is a mother.  I haven't read all of the posts...and don' t know if this came out in them or not....but I don't see how ANYONE who is a mother could allow that little girl to go through what Selina is experiencing.  Does anyone know?  Does Mia have children?   I am also very angry at Maria....but Enrique needs to "grow a set" and stand up to BOTH of these domineering women.

 

Even if Selina isn't his...there is absolutely NO QUESTION that she is the innocent victim and needs compassion from all sides.  If Mia is trying to score "new wife" points...she is going in the wrong direction.  I've been there.

Quote From: fromthesquare

As an adult child of divorce myself I have never heard ANYONE call me, my sister and 3 brothers my dad's old family.  I would guess that you are either very young or the NEW  wife (or both.)   Trust me any decent man's loyalty continue to lie with his children after a divorce.  You might hope for more men like Enrique but I hope for fewer stepmoms like you.

Quote From: fromthesquare

It is good that you won't date a man with children.  We never asked my mother or father to put us first or second.  We knew that they loved us and in spite of their divorce they were always there for us.  The woman that my father dated enjoyed our company as well.  She did not discard us as "out with the old and in with the new!"

 

I am 45 and my father is dead.  I am not a child.  I have 5 children of my own. They are our priority. 

Quote From: tylerby9

  We are parents to 8 children,a blended family.12 years strong and yes we are PARTNERS for the children sake BUT our job is to protect our children regardless,it is a package deal or NO DEAL.We do not pick each other OVER our children.We communicate & deal together FOR our children.Children come first,noone you meet or bring into their lives should EVER be chosen over them. I love my husband BUT if I do not consider my children EQUAL ,not before or after then not only does that make me immoral BUT that makes me a BAD parent.

 If someone chooses their partner over their children,that were here before them then sorry to say,that is one weak person.....and a failure,as a protector and nurturer of their children.SO be it,the choice you make.Dating men only w/out children,but I have to wonder,is that because you are too selfish too share that love & want NOONE before you.Love is sacrifice,seems you have no time for....

Quote From: sportyster

 Wow I sure hope that you never have children.  Loving parents do in fact put their children first, above themselves and anyone else in their lives.  That is what unconditional love is, if you had a choice of saving your child or yourself or your husband what choice would you make?  I'm guessing you'd save yourself.

Quote From: ladypat26

 Who made sure Enrique found out he wasn't the dad??? Dear old Mia.  If she would have kept her mouth shut and kept all her so called 'honesty' to herself.  Everyone could have gone on and had a happy life.  The nightmare she has brought on both Selina and Enrique goes on even beyond what the immoral mother did in the first place.  I am NOT defendingt her.  I agree she did the wrong thing.  But now instead of taking the high road for the sake of the child we have everyone wanting to be RIGHT in spite of the child.   This is the BIGGEST CRIME OF ALL!