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Messages By: juzzaboo

juzzaboo
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worried
August 18, 2007, 12:37 pm PDT

Losers never change!

   I have been in one of those relationships and believe me they are not fun at all you start feeling like your worthless and not worth a anything then appearance gets worst because you feel worse but they won't change they might seem they changed for like a month or two but at the end when they do get in there anger moods they will go back to where they started and treat you just like they use to.  I am very happy with the guy that I am with right now memories of back then do come back and he understands, like when we get in arguments he knows his distance and won't get in my bubble or I will coward and sometimes the abusers name will come out he gets mad but like I said he understands!  But my best advise to give a women that is getting in a relationship is that if he makes you change from who you are then don't date him you are your own person and you are NOT his property! Stand up for yourself  don't ever step down. Thats why women these days has to go on shows like this not to say I hate dr. phil but women should not be weak. We should be strong especially what we go through in life. We go through the heck of having babies and rasein them at the house keeping the house clean or even working to make a living for the family we should be strong people! I bet no man could ever go through labor of having a baby. So stand tall and be strong women!!
 
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juzzaboo
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worried
August 18, 2007, 12:51 pm PDT

Don't do it.

Quote From: tis2firey

I suffered physical and emotional abuse in my second marriage we were married 1 & 1/2 yrs.  We divorced at the end of 1999. We have been talking recently and he is asking me to marry him again. Do you think it is possible for an abuser to change??? I need some advice. I welcone any and all responses. Thanks for listening.
  If he did it the first time he will do it another time. Don't give him that chance don't do the 3strikes and your out. Start at the begining make your life easier. It will be a lot of heart break but believe me girl its worth it. I thought my ex the one that had emotionaly and physically abused me, I thoght we were going to be together forever and get married and have kids but we were off and on 5 times and finally my girlfriends knocked some since into me that they have been telling me every time that we broke up and got back together that why would he change when he didn't treat you good the first time. Women weren't met to be put on this earth to be used. The men should treat you the same way as what they did before he married you wich i hope was good. Just think if you had kids with him. They would see this and maybe the son would think it would be ok to treat his girlfriend like that or if it was a girl she would be in the same boat you are in and I know you don't wish that on your children. So be strong and there is always someone out there for you. I had just found mine and I love him so much and we are about to have a kid. I am very happy in my life and that is where you should be! 
 
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juzzaboo
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surprised
August 18, 2007, 1:24 pm PDT

Im in the same boat as your daughter.

Quote From: lind24

 

I have been thru this in the past, myself, and you're probably more worried than she is.

 

As long as she has your support; that's most important.  She'll figure it out and probably

socialize and live where people of class are, as well as open minds - educated minds, such as

(usually) big cities where people are happy, carefree and not in a 1956 mindset.

 

Good luck-keep supporting her.  

  I am i like the same boat as your daughter that when you said the story that was like you were talking about my life. I did date white guys but I have now been dating this guy for almost two years. We have known each other for three but together a year in a half. Just like you said this guy treats me like a woman. He puts my needs before his and always never makes me feel less than what he met me. I love him so much that we are expecting a kid here soon but the problem is that my dad and my step mom aren't to crazy about the mixing thing. they are worried that the baby will be made fun of because he is mixed as in im indian and white and he is african american. I tell them that it isn't how he looks but what his attitude and his personality is like. They are also afraid that he will follow in the male african steryotype that he will leave me starnded and as a single mom and no child support or anything. They are total wrong about him. He finished high school as class president high gpa and all around sports. He is also in coollege to make a future for his upp coming family and works also. I use to have two jobs but he made me quit one and now he does over time to make up for the other job for us.   He is a very supporting guy all my other family dad and real mom's family side loves him the only problem I have is my step mom and my dad are not comfortable with the idea. I finally got tired of all the lecturing that i told my dad that if he does't want to be a grandpa that is fine because the baby has plenty of family to love him.  So you tell her to do what here heart and if you think this guy is right for your daughter give her that support!! But i am so glad I found this message on this board because its nice to know that you aren't the only one.  respond back if you would like. I would like to here from you. oh and there is a pic of me and my boyfriend on my profile take a look at it.
 
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juzzaboo
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frustrated
August 23, 2007, 10:00 am PDT

how could a grand parent do this???

How could a grandparent do this to their own blood! What really made me mad was that he said he thought she liked  it like a kid likes candy. What the heck!! That is crazy. She is a little girl yea she knows candy but not anything sexual at that time. He also blammed it that it was the devils fault. If I was that mom in that same room with him and heard that come out of his mouth I would get up and hit him in the face right there. How dare he blame this on tsomething else than himself. Oh and now he is ok because he found god. God does wonders for many things but just because he has god doesn't mean that girl is going to get her inocence back. I was totaly disgusted when i saw this show i was actually mad and ticked off when i wa watching it. The garnd parents should lose all rights to see the girl and at 18 if the girl wants it is her decision to see them but right now they should be banned!!
 
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juzzaboo
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September 8, 2007, 11:29 am PDT

cheaters never change

Why do women let men do this to them. he didn't only cheat on her with a women but he cheated on her with a teenager a kid practicaly!! Im sure she didn't hire this girl to watch her husband. that wife should have kept that divorce and let him be with the teenager or any other kid and let him get in trouble for being a petafile and not let it shame the family. Im sorry but i was always raised that your actions dosen't just reflect on you but your family to. I was told never act a fool like that. so now people are going to look at her saying that she is married to a petafile and she has kids. the general public would worry for the kids. he did it to a teenager do you think he would do somethin to the kids. you never now!!
 
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juzzaboo
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surprised
September 21, 2007, 10:21 am PDT

this man is crazy

I had watched this show. This man is crazy he does owe that couple m,oney for thier wedding. They paid a lot for this wedding and he ruined it for the both of them it was like their wedding was a mockery! I would sue him i would not wait until his stupied fake book comes out. Even if it does come out like anyone is going to buy it, but he is a constent liar!!!  he could not even keep his stories straight!!
 
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juzzaboo
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September 29, 2007, 1:23 pm PDT

THIS IS NOT RIGHT

I am not african american but my boyfriend is and my child is half black but i live in a town where in order for the black race to look good in our town you have to be good in a sport or live in the govenor's neighborhood. me and my boyfriend watched this show together and it makes us worry how our kid is going to grow up in our society. nothing would have started at Jena if that boy did not hang the nuse HE STARTED IT!! How i was raised when i was little is that i better not start the fight but i better finish it or my parents wasn't going to come to help me. but plainly not beating around the bush. If he had the balls to start the fight he better have those same balls to finish it. which of course he didn't becfause he got beat up. this was not a prank it was not a tease and i didn't see anyone laughing. there is just certain things that i hope parents teach their kids about what to say or when to far is just to far. As what i got the parents were some what racist because they should have known that joke was not a joke and hope they learned that with all the riots and complications they caused. I do think the guy deserved to get his butt kicked but it shouldn't of been from 6 guys one of them should have done it and he should have just got a battery charge because the white guy is still walking and talking he even said on the show that he was fine! plus it was unfair he should have got something to especially since he started it
 
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juzzaboo
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surprised
October 6, 2007, 9:01 am PDT

mixing

I have had to face this with my family. I dated white men but those relationships were emotionaly and phisically abusive. I met my boyfriend now and he is african american he is this best man i have ever had. this man wouldn't lay a hand on me and has never in the three years i have known him and dated him for almost two years has ever called me a name. He has never defaced me never put me down for who i am or what i look like. He accepts me for me. He gives me every last of his money if i need it or sacrifice anything just to make me happy. I fact i am proud to say that i two weeks we are going to have a baby boy. and i  am proud to be the mom of his child. My family of course at the beging hated that i went out of the race. Well realy everyone was skepticdal about it but my dad and my stepmom were the ones that were totaly against it. when the family finnally met him and talked to him they found out that he was a good guy. he graduated with honors president of his class and an all time sports awards. He also president of 3 other clubs at his high school. He also is very active in the salvation army boys and girls club. He is already graduated and he is in college and he plans to graduate.  They woke up and was like wow this guy is actually a good guy well right now my dad has came around to hliking him and my stepmom has got closer but al that i say cares is that i am happy. I have a wonderful guy and a handsome son on the way. I am trully happy in my life and no one can take that away from me not even my family. They have the choice to be apart of the kids life but if they don't that is thier loss.

 
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juzzaboo
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October 6, 2007, 9:25 am PDT

you go girl.

Quote From: mariamlone

Hello.

i,m sorry that you are afraid to tell your father about your love in your life.i have been married to a man from another race, we,re not married today that is not my parents or anyone elses fault. You need to tell your father that this is your love and newfound mate, he will be worried for you, i,m sorry if he wont accept your mate becauce of race and all, but this is your life, your father need to go  through his feeling of what that might be, in the end if he loves you enough he will accept your mate, or it is his loss, i hope i have not hurt you or your family by writing this, my own dad was a big only white man for my daughters, but today he has accepted as much as he can the man i,m married to. when i was growing up i did not know that my parents did not like people of another race, and this is Denmark, europe, i never knew. I wish you the best in telling your dad, and if he does not want to see your mate, that is his choice, you have to respect that, if he sees that you two are happy, and that your mate is the best thing that ever happend to you he might just come around, again i dont know, but i  wish you the best, with your mate yourself and your dad, mariamlone,denmark

You keep that attitude this is your life you are the one that is living it not them. You deserve to be happy. All you can do is make yourself happy because in the long run that is the best. if the man treats you right supports you and doesn't abuse you in any way keep him.we live in society that shouldn't base people on how they look like but how the act or respect people or how he presents hisself. If he does good you keep him and if the family has a problem they have the choice to be there or not and make it there loss if they don't
 
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juzzaboo
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hopeful
January 26, 2008, 6:14 am PST

Baggy pants boys

My boyfriend which is my baby daddy is African American and he is from th north side of tulsa which is the bad side of tulsa that is majorly African American. There are gangs and shootings and moms pushing a stroller in 30 degree weather there and who would think a nice man like him would come out of that kind of place. In his family everyone looks up to the grandparents and to elders are very respected.  They were raise to respect there selves and have pride in the family and not embarrass the family. They were taught to make something of themselves and prove that someone out of that environment can make it in life without being in a gang. How a family is raised there is by the family not just the parents so when a kid goes to school the represent a family and how the present themselves the men in his family can wear baggy pants as long as the boxers are not showing they have to wear a belt and believe me if they are at a family gathering and a elder finds you with your pants low they will pull them down and embarrass you and then they will tie a rope around you to keep your pants on and then you get made fun of the remainder of the day and you don't want to make grandma mad in the family. Grandmas run the family if she catches you, well you might as well leave and come back next family gathering. Also in school they hope you do a good job my man graduate with honors and the president of his class and all around sportsmen He came to the top and made a good name for the family. So I do Say it is not respectful for yourself or the people around to present yourself like that it just gives you a title and why would you want a title why don't you want to make something of yourself and show that you have over came something of living in such a run down part of a town and that you concurred life!
 
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