Messages By: lindapolar

Quote From: mswing10

My husband is experiencing this this right now.  I'm amazed at how cruel people can be. 

Quote From: namedeclin

I work in a science research lab in a university.  I work for a young faculty member.  His bullying is similar to verbal abuse in marriage.  He attempts to control people's perceptions by trying to make people think that the "truth" is what he constructs.  He uses extensive note taking, in which the notes contain falsehoods, omissions and misinterpretations, to attempt to construct images that he can claim to be the "truth."  He goes to a lot of trouble to do this.  He also has elaborate methods to try to throw me off guard and try to diminish my self confidence.  He will write up descriptions of incidents leaving out his own behvaior and the ways he started trouble.  Then he tries to portray my responses as "unprofessional behavior."  For example, he refused to give include my name on publications, and then claimed it was a "behavior" problem when I cried about it.  But he failed to state the reason I cried.  He asked me in detail about a particular task I performed.  Then he focused on the most insignificant part of it and said "that's trivial."  But he ignored the major effort.  He adds on extra features and extra tasks and then accuses me of not finishing work quickly enough.  I got a problem to work that he and a post-doc could not get to work.   I did this because I could figure out all of the math and they could not.  Then he said I was wasting time going into the math, that he could understand all of the math and that if I would have asked him, he could have explained it.  I had spoken with him about the problem.  He assigned it to me because they weren't able to solve it.  His "explanations" are incomplete and meaningless - he draws a sloppy sketch or throws around some terminiology.  He is always trying to turn everything I say or do into a negative.  The administration of the university makes grandiose claims to be a humane and ethical workplace, but that is baloney, since the administration people just act like flatteres for whoever is the authority figure.  It is nice when employees have a strong labor union.  But the important word here is "strong."  We have a union with a bunch of do-nothings.  We have been hired for union-covered work outside of union categories.  I called the union several times and they said a steward would call and the steward never called.  What good is it to have a union if that particular union is run by do-nothings.  I wish we were part of the ILWU.  Then they couldn't play around the jobs and employees.  The effects of the stress: right now I have a rash that the doctor thinks is shingles.  I am exploring the possibilities for medical leave and possibly workmen's compensation.