It’s so hard for me to look at her and her magnificent roomy house and lavish practical belongings and not bubble and froth ith anger that she could possibly want more. The more being rooms of extra fabric jewelry and knick-knacks. I understand that she is trying to quell anxiety but ho can she not be devastated with guilt knowing that shopping an accumulating is as bad as being strung out on drugs gambling or any other addiction when she has so much and there are so many poor people in the world and probably close to her very own neghborhood. It’s so hard for me not to hate but I know I can’t because some of it is because of my own situation. I am in my 30’s and I give every penny I earn to my parents because it barely pays for my asthma medcation an if they didn’t have some of my salary too they’d lose their house and things because they make so little money. She says being accountable for evey penny is degrading and I agree with that because I have to ask for small things like a candy bar, a pn for work, socks, and can’t even conider spending on things like dinner out, a movie, or whatever. It’s awful but if there isn’t centralized money bills don’t get paid it’s such an awful place to be. My father is a terrible hoarder he has a basement full of old tests from his students in case they ever dispute a grade and he’s been teaching since the 70’s. He has invitations and fliers because he feels it’s important to know what people were into or considered important at that time. Our house is covered with boxes of old medications from his mother in the 1960’s and cards and memorabilia nothing valuable. He insists his bed he got for confirmation, age 13, is good ebeough though it’s layered with grime and peeling and he’s in his 60’s. Our house is often filled with fruit flies because getting a good deal on chep fruit or veg that you can only eat so much of bfore it sppils. My parents got into an argumet over a bad ear of corn and the kernels were bubbly already it was so bad. Some of it is age and some is laziness that things pile up and I onl have so much time and energy to clean up after hm all the time. I know it’s anxiety for him and his parents divorce and you know it had to be bad with whole community involvement for a catholic couple to get a divorce back in the 60’s. He used to be a bad alchoholic but he quit cold turkey one day and he still has the patterns of rage, uncontrolled, nd anxiety like he did when h was intoxicated. I just fel horrible about it but I am not a millionaire to change anything.
