Messages By: shcaeffer

If you are unwilling or unable to love an adopted child, then  you are unable to love a bilogical child.  I am a single adoptive parent of a child born to a mother with a $350/day heroin habit, who also took any other drug she could get her hands on.  My daughter, born at 32 weeks, was on a morphine drip for 12 weeks to go through withdrawal from an addiction to heroin, cocaine, crack, and marijuana.  Two years earlier my sister adopted her brother,who had the same prenatal polydrug history.  At  27 months, my daughter was diagnosed as bi-polar.  My daugher is Hispanic and Native American, and I am white.  At age 3, she pointed out that "our skin doesn't match."  I was taken aback, because I had never given the fact that we were different races a single thought. My brother has an adopted child and 2 biological children, my sister has a stepson, 3 adopted children, and 2 biological children, and I have my daughter.  We talk openly about adoption, and there is no difference in the love and attention any child receives.  So, if you believe you can only love your "own" child, perhaps you should evaluate your ability to love any child.  A child is  a child, not a trophy.