Messages By: bj1962

I don't generally comment on programs..but wow!

If this guy can act like that on National Television? Just imagine what he is like with this poor woman behind closed doors..I can't even process that thought.

I do hope Phil McGraw follows up on this, this guy is dangerous...seriously a threat. Having the couple that has taken him in on there shows just how 'manipulative' he is, he's a pathological liar that takes zero accountability and lives in denial.

Wow again...I sure hope someone has an eye on this situation!

I am just wondering from the comments of a few folks...how do you know so much about the program before it has been aired?

Were you in the audience for the taping or something?

Thanks in advance for any insight :-)

Coming from a family of three girls I can say that between all of us, we must have covered every eating disorder there is. I feel so badly for this gal, but it is not as easy to change as many folks would like to think. Whatever issue(s) are the driving force behind her illness, they will have to be addressed and processed before anything will ever change. This is so much more complex than just getting her to eat...just watching her in the pre-video it appears that there is already some damage done regarding her cognitive abilities.

I will watch in hopes that the doctors can offer this young lady some serious help in (at least) getting her 'stablized', this gal is knocking on death's door right now...it is actually a wonder that her heart hasn't given out yet. As this progresses her organs will shut down, her thinking will become more hazy..and sadly she will die.

I hope that it isn't too late for her..but she is very close. I had a female cousin who died from anorexia/bulemia..she was rail thin for a long time...and then one day her heart just stopped beating..she was only 24.

I wish her olnly the best of luck...she has a long journey ahead of her.

I have read the board from the first part of this program, I look forward to seeing the second part on Monday.

For myself? This is so not about money nor land....nor wills. These are symptoms of something so much deeper, yet arguing about these things probably feels safer for these folks than dealing with what are truly the issue(s). This *mother* needs to look at why she witholds love from her eldest daughter, I'm sure she has plenty of surface reasons...but it is much more than that. This didn't just happen over night, this has become the relationship between the two of them....the way they have learned to communicate.

I am not sure the youngest daughter is old enough yet (or has enough life experience) to understand where her sister is coming from, and be able to separate what is 'real' as opposed to what she has been jaded with by their mother's input to her.

I don't think that it is as simple as a 'group' effort to 'get along', the relationships between mother/eldest daughter, mother/youngest daughter, as well as the 'sister' relationship are separate to me.

I guess I just don't get why some parents think that pitting their children against each other is 'alright', I do get the 'control' aspect...but how is that meant to 'work' in the end? Nobody truly 'wins'....

I (we) have three kids in their twenties, good grief, if I ever thought them to be so bitter and divided....especially over me? It would break my heart to pieces...I would spend the rest of my days trying to figure out 'why'...and making it better. What better can one give their children than a feeling of 'belonging'? Of being a part of something soft enough to land on...yet strong enough to hold you up when the world throws a curve ball? As mothers I believe we are meant to ready our children for the world...how can we send them out there with such a cracked foundation and expect them to thrive? They will be the parents of our grandchildren...what will we have shown them?

I guess I don't get it....and I think I am fairly glad that I don't.   

I hope there is some help for this 'family'...sometimes I have a problem with the root meanings of words when they are used in a general sense. Words like 'mother' and 'family'...they tend to mean something different to me....good luck to them.

bj

While I was watching this program I had to leave to go into another room, but I could still hear what was being said. While listening to Wendy and Noah 'argue' it dawned on me that it didn't sound like a ten year old boy and his mother having a disagreement, it sounded more like a husband and wife to me..or boyfriend and girlfriend. We have 'raised' two boys (now in their twenties), at ten years old their lives were much more concerned about playing soccer, friends...winking at the girls (just a little).

I was in the room when he slapped his mother....oddly, I didn't think that she looked that surprised by it...my jaw would have dropped off of my face. It would be interesting to hear if this was indeed the first time he has slapped her, she sure looked rather composed after it happened.

And again just an observation....when she was looking at him? If I hadn't known better I would never have thought that the person across from her was a ten year old child...maybe a husband/boyfriend...an 'adult' adversary perhaps. But certainly not a child that she has brought into the world that has suffered the losses that she knows about...again, just observations.

It will be interesting to see how this follows up in the coming weeks, there sure is lots of pain to go around on this program.

Just my opinion of course.

I just feel like I have to write something...anything...this group of folks has moved me so much.

It has been a long time since I have cried like that, my heart was/is just breaking for all of them.

I have had a very abusive past as well and have spent eight years now getting stronger and becoming a 'creative survivor'..instead of a victim. One of the best things I heard from so many on there was 'Enough!', when one lays their burden down to rest, let's go of it (sometimes very slowly)...they can begin to heal.

Eventually as we begin to heal we can see how things have played out in our lives, punishing ourselves with self destruction....not ever letting ourselves be the best we can...carrying that cross on our backs up hill for so many years...and only we can stop it.

I so hope that Dr. Phil and his team keep up with what happens for these folks in the coming months and years...many are just becoming who they truly are.

I send only my best thoughts out for healing.....please, take good care of YOU.