Messages By: meowqueen1953

Hate is a very stong word to use I think. Hating someone who you don't even know is even worse. I have no idea what this family is going through anyway. We just see what goes on TV and not in the home. They show what they want us to see on TV. I did not see the show on Monday but the way people are talking about Noah, there seems to be a lot of problems in this family. I think they all need a good therapist to talk to. Maybe they will get the help they need. It takes the whole family to be involved in whatever is going on with this family.

    Hate means to me a lot of anger towards someone. Are you angry with Noah or his actions?

I'm sorry the *question* was, "What abuser stops abusing their victim, once their victim submits"? 

I agree with you, I think she has her own issues..

 Yoshi, we all have our past to live down and live with. We have a tendency to draw from them in our opinions and ideas. You seem to be a "victim" your self. Maybe you were abused and nobody listened. However, every kid that says this is not always telling the truth.

I have a 5 year old son that acts just like Noah. He was told no, he was spanked, put in time-out, had things taken away, NOTHING WORKS!

I completely understand Noahs mom and how she is behaving. My 20 year old daughter was a perfect (close as you can get) child. I hardly ever spanked her, she just wasn't bad. My son has been "hell-on-wheels" since the womb! It all started with Colic and never stopped.

I have found myself saying and doing things I never would have done with my daughter. The more I try to get control of him the worse he gets. He has slapped me, spit on me, stripped naked in the kitchen and told me he was going to pee on me.  I have spanked him 5-6 times before 8:00 am.

He is ADHD and I discovered that the medicine (Adderral) was making him agressive and defiant. However, I have lived thru 2 years of hell first.

I took him to Psychiatrists, Counselors, Doctors and got really into debt. Finally it occured to me that he did not act like this before the medicine. So I asked the shrink if that (medicine) could be the problem and she muttered, "well, maybe". Guess what, it was!!!  My son was taken off the medicine and now he is just a normal brat, still hyper and misbehavin, but not the monster he became..

I had a rifle in the garage and I used to tell myself that, if the Dr. said there was nothing that would fix it, I would just come home, pull into the garage and blow my head off. I just knew I could not live like this forever, someone had to tell me it would get better.

I did send my son to his Dads house for a while, because I was soooo beaten down from years and years of this, I could no longer behave. I was really scared of what I could or would do.

I do think this Mom IS different away from the cameras, I can guarantee it.

BUT.... Noah is a manipulative, lying, disrespectful brat. If it was me that he slapped, I probably would have slapped him right back, without even thinking.

It is very easy to judge, I just hope you never have to find out what its like, first hand.

Noah, a boy crying out for help from his abusive mother. He's ignored, his mother is told it's because she isn't controlliing him enough. Dr. Phil, do you belive that because Noah is a boy, he should just learn to get over it? Would you have delt with this situation the same way if a father was behaving this way towards his daughter? Has it ever occured to you that from the beginning, Noah's mother was manipulating you? That she's become a professional at acting like the victim, while beingn the victimizer.

Most people can see a child who is already damaged. Where do you think Noah learned how to be so manipulative? Noah is being sent the message, time and time again, he is unwanted because he was born the wrong gender. If he were a girl he'd be heard, if he were a girl he wouldn't be abused by his mother. If he were only the daughter she wanted.

This may sound extreme, but I wouldn't be surprised as Noah grows older, and things don't change. He becomes a transvestite, or wants to get a sex change. Everytime he turns around he's being told, "You deserve to be punished, because you're not female. You don't have a right to speak up, because your male. Men are supposed to just deal with it. You have no right to speak up to your mother, because she's female, and therfore better than you."

If this isn't textbook on how to create a Norman Bates, I don't know what is. You're so concerned Noah doesn't have respect for women, that he's going to abuse women. He knows his place, he has learned that men in this world do not have a right to exsist as they are. He has learned that only women are sympathized with, not men.

You have wasted your time today Dr. Phil. You had an opportunity to save Noah from his abusive mother, and instead you sat there and told him point blank, "Who do you think you are? How dare you suggest your mother is abusing you. Women don't do that, you are lying." You reinforced that she is better than him, that his dead sister was better than he is, even that the little girl in the other family deserves to be heard. He doesn't, because he was born a boy.