Messages By: melyssa_sea

Hi There :)

 

I am an Australian single mom of a 7 year old who has high functioning Autistic Spectrum Disorder and he too is much like your child. Gabrial had issues with behaviour and speech around 2 and a half which led to the diagnosis but now is doing fantastic. He is in a regular classroom at school and moves to the grade above him for English classes Science Classes and Computer Studies. He is currently reading at a 5th grade level and yes it has been some hard work but honestly I am just so blessed by him. He is beautiful child with such a way with others and is incredibly compassionate. He is very articulate as well. :D He seems to have a 6th sense in his compassion and wanting to make everyone feel better and happy :D

 

Thanks for a great post :D

Heya :D

 

25 yr old Gold Coast QLD mom with 7 yr old son :D Would love to chat to y'all anytime :D

 

MSN (instant messaging and email) prrrincesstoyou@hotmail.com

Yahoo beautybelle1981@yahoo.com

Myspace - www.myspace.com/prrrincesstoyou

 

Hope to chat soon :D God bless and 'rock on Dr Phil!'

Thanks Ruthie :D And the new layout doesnt bother me cos I didnt see that other one :P Perhaps they are using instant messengers to catch up keep in touch etc :D Anyhows thanks again and God bless x x x x

I am bothered by the fact that no one has mentioned ANYTHING about Amy. Brandon says several times that she and Heidi (the Friend) are not angels and that they have their own skeletons in the closet yet the focus is completely on Brandon and what he has done. I remember something I learned a long time ago and that is that there is always 2 sides to every story and I noticed that Amy did not look people in the eyes. She was changes her story several times (in respect as to whether she will take Brandon back or why she is even on the show) and seems to me like there is definately something more to the story.

 

I am not saying that Brandon is or was an angel or anything I completely agree with Dr Phil on the note at the end saying that Brandon is a messed up person with a really hard past and needs time although I wonder seriously whether Amy will do the right thing either and is the right person for him. She seems incredibly weak, she relies on her family for alot of money and help, she seems to sway whichever way the wind is blowing at the time and also seems very shallow in the pics Dr Phil shows of them when they first met. Also I know that they way Brandon reacted to Heidi was not good it was cruel to cal lher names but seriously how many men do you know that would sit there and take that sort of punishment from people that are all there against him - he had not one person there that supported him and his quest.  I get the feeling that the household is great while it is just him and Amy and the kids but when the family or Heidi come in Amy sways with them and Brandon becomes the 'BAD GUY"

 

 As for Heidi I feel that there are inconsistancies in the fact that she apparently cares so much about Amy and the babies yet she is willing to never see the family again if Amy doesnt do what Heidi says. That rings alarm bells for me.

 

I think congrats are in order for Brandon - he has stood up like a man and admitted he was selfish and wrong and he has said he is willing to do whatever it takes - if he sticks to his care that Dr Phil offers I think he will be an amazing person full of confidence and care. I would kill to be able to find a man that will admit when he is wrong!!

I am an Australian 25 year old mom to one 7 year old and I am a survivor of Munchausens Sydrome but was never called this until much later.

 

My mom was diagnosed Manic Depressive Schitzophrenic and so many other things as her symptoms are incredible severe. I was 'sick' before even being born and was tested constantly for everything, then once born I was medicated constantly with so many medications that I cannot even begin to explain it. Even my formula came on Prescription. I was poked and poked and poked and always diagnosed with this and that and my father was always denied any access to me cos I was 'too sick' I was 5 when I was first started on antidepressants cos I 'slept to much' (prob because he was feeding me antishistimines strong enough to kill a rhino but anyhow) I was always super super skinny cos I am 'allergic' to wheat gluten lactose dust grass cats dogs any animals chlorine and so many more things including asthma preventitives (which convieniently kept me hooked up to oxygen all the time) and then once I was old enough (around 11) I was hospitalised for anorexia (because of my weight and because I didnt have my period yet) after that she started telling people I was mental and I would be admitted to the mental wards where she would do all the 'normal' munchausens crap like make sure I refused to eat drink or take medicine unless she was there. I would scream at the nurses in anger and the doctors because they would never ever listen when I told them I wasnt sick. I was hospitalised again by mom about 2 years ago who put in a 3 day order for me to be admitted to the mental ward again (which coincidentally requires no symptoms) after I had my son. She also told the Dr's that I would harm my son and had me isolated so that I couldnt see anyone but her. I have tried and tried to understand even went along with her lies telling me that I was sick just to try and get her to love me for me but I learned recently that she will never love me she is only ever interested in herself and getting what she needs from me.

 

It hurts every day but I have made the decision 6 months ago that I will no longer have any contact - not for me but for my son - I caught her beginning to do the same with him and it scared the life out of me. I just wish there was a treatment and that it wasnt such an underground diagnosis. I know that she cant help it.

I completely agree that Brandon and Amy should NOT be together, he needs alot of help and work to get through his issues - my point was that SO DOES SHE -  and I believe from the show Heidi was actaully living with them at the time that all those things occurred?

I just wanted to add that with Munchausens the mom's are only abusing these kids medically but almost always it is physical as well. I was often beaten and unable to go to school because of this and I remember Heather also saying that her mom would 'spank' her for no reason.

 

These mom's are so adept at lying and hiding the truth that they are able to hide and or manipulate anything and everything to their favour. My entire school life teachers would ask questions and sometimes I would lie but even when I did get the gall to tell the truth of what was happening they would go straight back to my mom and tell her what I had said which just cemented the fact that she had all the power and that I had no one to help or protect me. My mom had lied to everyone around her lawyers ministers teachers friends and even family still to this day believe that I am what my mom has said I am.  I finally found my dad a few years ago and as I thought she had been lying to me every day of my whole life about him too. I think the biggest problem is that the Munchausens sufferer doesnt believe they are lying - the truly believe what they are saying!! The Munchausens mom is abusive to a child in her care in every way known to man - emotionally, physically, mentally, medically and so many more.

 

I have seen the question asked as to why she (Tracy) would hide pregnancy and have home births when she could get so much attention from it - It is becuase it is not about attention as much as it is about the power. The power they have as a mother it makes them feel so powerful to know that they are the one thing keeping the child alive and that the Dr's will believe ANYTHING they (Munchausens mom) say, I believe Tracy did what she did because SHE COULD! My mom was very much the same - she would always test things and she more often than not found she could get away with anything so would try the next level and the next and so on and so on. Munchausens isnt just about taking the child to the Dr's or the attention, it is about power, it is about THEIR MIND! it is about A LOT OF SELF PITY!!!!! Poor me - I have a sick child, Poor me - look how much I do for my child - Poor me - NO ONE HELPS ME Poor me - WITHOUT ME YOU WOULD HAVE NO ONE Poor me - NO ONE ELSE WANTS YOU Poor me look I took care of a child that no one else would and look what happened to me - Prison has just played right into that mind set for Tracy, as far as the Munchausens mom goes everything in the whole world is about them they honestly dont know that it isnt! They need to feel important and the most powerful the one and only.

 

 

It has taken me a few days to work out what I felt and wanted to say here if anything but here goes. At first I will be honest I got a little 'protective' and was like "Hey Kayla just forgive and be done with it, he cant help it' and this I can only guess is because I have lived a life similar to yours in the sense that my dad has never paid child support and I only met him 2 years ago when I was 23. The difference being that I was 'raised' by mom mom who suffered from Munchausens Syndrome by proxy amongst other serious mental disorders. I remember very very ittle and coincidentally was 3 when my dad left too. I remember when my mom would beat me I would sob for hours begging my daddy to come back and help me but my mom would always say that he never cared about me and he never paid any money to her so I was her child and not his and anything else toxic she could think of at the time. It was then that I realised that your mom was nothing like my mom and so you have something I dont - A feeling of self worth - a feeling that you DESERVED better than your dad gave you and Kayla - you did!

 

You deserved a dad that even if he didnt want to pay would hug you and tell you he loved you, a dad that was there emotionally and physically even if he couldnt be financially. I now feel that good on you Kayla for standing up for yourself and saying that HEY! what you did to me Dad was low and unforgivable and worst of all what you did to my best friend and brother was downright evil. I commend you on standing for your brother and for all the hurt he felt I am so pleased that you were able to do that for him and for yourself.

 

I hope that the rest of the people on here that are saying to 'get over it' will realise this too as they have no idea what it is like to walk a day in your shoes let alone a lifetime. I realised today that my Dad will never be my Dad and that the hobo that lives on my block and I have a relationship much more than my Dad and I ever will and as much as that hurts the reality gives closure I think. I also want to say Thanks to you Kayla for being so strong and for sharing your life with us and opening yourself up to the message boards and comments of people that like I mentioned dont relaly know you - that takes real guts. I know that there wouldnt be a day go by that you arent grateful to your mom for what she gave to you and your brother when no doubt she was feeling horrid to for what she had lost in a husband and friend. God bless you and those beautiful children you have I know that you will cherish every single moment you have with them and God bless your wonderful mom too :)

 

For the rest of you reading this as Dr Phil watchers, yes a father is supposed to help financially but most of all it is about being a father to the child emotionally, the hugs and the love - you cant buy that with any amount of money. My sons father cant pay child support but that will never affect my son - it makes it a little harder on me finacially but I wouldnt change it for the whole world - no amount of money can buy you a Dad, that takes someone really special - God bless to all the great Dad's out there x x x x x