Quote From: jadajb Humans come in all shapes, sizes, colours and personalities. Lucky me can only hear them as I am blind, and from what I've heard whether via TV or my computer, these couples are no diffrent than a lot of other couples all over the world or in this case, the USA. I've followed the Dr Phil show daily and I daresay many a time, after listening to the video inserts, it's hard to tell whether the people on the show are the same people as in the video inserts. It's like they have different personalities or pretending to be cool, calm and collected, whereas in the inserts, they scream, cuss etc. Yes, these couples did Man-Camp and my guess is, afterwards those who are willing to accept it, will get some help, but will it last? Only time will tell.
I am married. 18 years and because I am blind, we had to iron out our expectations of our marriage before we headed to the altar. Not having children was one of the difficult decisions since our children would have inherited Stargardts Disease from me. My husband understood only too well how selfish that would be if I pass this on to our children and no we didn't adopt. I have decided to use my love for children to speak out on behalf of those who didn't have a voice and my husband supports me in that.
18 years ago, we made one important decision, we are equal partners in this marriage. I'm not a doormat, because I have the disadvantage of being blind and he is not my keeper, my father or my controller. Yes we have expectations - we both wanted to be treated with dignity, respect and have an unbreakable trust that we will do what is right towards each other and this marriage. Over time, I have found my voice as an inspirational speaker and author. Oftentimes I am a firecracker when it comes to the playing fields of politics, but we know, we have only each other to love. There are no children to keep us in each other's lives. We are there because that is what we wanted and still want.
Yes, sometimes we disagree, but we discuss it like adults should. Calmly.
What I often hear on this show, is people screaming and shouting at each other, throwing tantrums like two year old toddlers, with the children there to observe and I get this feeling like I'm listening to adults stuck in puberty or in their teeanage sturm und drang years.
I can't judge people on what I see, but only on what comes out of their mouths and that's how I experience people. Perhaps too many people make too many excuses for their own unwillingness to become an adult and to realize for every decision there is a consequence and that there won't be a Dr Phil for all, to come and help put their lives together again. Just.........grow up.
Jadajb
If only more couples would do what you two did before marrying, sharing your expectations and setting up boundaries, Dr Phil would be out of his West Coast job. And, back in Dallas working full time as a litigation consultant. But, too many people marry in haste, out of lust. Or, for a myriad of other wrong reasons. And, join Dr Phil's waiting list.
