Messages By: niceguysyndrom

    Why is it ok for women to use men? Society not only approves of this, but it is the humorus punchline in endless jokes in sitcoms and dramas on tv. It's clear women only want  one thing from men.  What men can buy them! "I don't wan't no man unless he gots a J.O.B. ".  Women are just as bad if not worse than these men.  Women use sex to get what they want. These guys are just turning the tables on beautifull women that are used to getting what they want.
     I am divorced because my ex wife had nothing left to drain from me. I was sucked spiritually, intelectually, emotionally and financially dry by her. So, she moved on to find a nother poor sucker to vamp. All I see are zombie husbands and boyfriends all over, lumbering in that walk of shame and depression.  It's about time a few men are fighting back. I wish I could be more like the guys on this show. I wish I could objectify women like they objectify me. All I am to them is a bank account until they find out that I've been bled dry. Then they have no interest in getting to know me. Professional, strong, careing or not.  I want that pamplet that guy wrote so I can have a fighting chance.
     It's a war and men are losing. I'm tired of being used. Women just don't like it being thrown back into their faces. There isn't a woman alive that hasn't used sex to get what they want. Why shouldn't the tables finally be turned on them?
     This is not the rantings of an angry or bitter divorced guy that is looking for an audience to unload his anger. I've been over that years ago.  I have made a lot of observations for over 40 years and I think it's about time men finally stood up for themselves when dealing with women. I think it's finaly time that there is some equallity.
    I have learned love is a fantasy perpetuated buy women and inflicted on young boys to fool them into thinking that a woman could possibly care for them. They do this be sure our species continues.
    Men then grow up with this fantasy in their head and can't understand why women are just using them. Why what mom taught them just doesn't jell with the real world. They keep trying what good old mom put in their head about being a good guy, be respectful, be affectionate, be a provider, be understanding, be witty, be smart, be caring, and be the responsible bread winner. Then they learn that their wifes are sleeping around on them spending all their money on shoes (because who is going to get the thousands of dollars in shoes in the divorce? Well it isn't the men). 
    They learn that there are no women anywhere on the planet that will ever want them for who they are or what is in their soul. They learn that all they are to women is a shell of resources to be drained, licked clean and the withered husk thrown in the toilet.
    I say more power to these guys. If I were younger I'd try to join them. It's to late for me. All you young men out there, learn from these guys.  The only person that will watch out for you is you. It will never be a woman. Quit being that nice guy. Look where it got me. Don't end up like me, with a life time of regret for trying to be the best guy I could be. You will never find that fantasy of "Love" because it doesn't exist.
    If you are woman and you want to say how much you pitty me, and that I'm a sad little man. Or you want to question my masculinity or some other childish assinine attack. Give it a rest. Give me a intelegent argument or go say nothing. After all these year I finally figured it out and I want help break the cycle women using men in my own little way.


Thank you reading and I hope you have great day.

"If you are woman and you want to say how much you pitty me, and that
I'm a sad little man. Or you want to question my masculinity or some
other childish assinine attack. Give it a rest. Give me a intelegent
argument or go say nothing. After all these year I finally figured it
out and I want help break the cycle women using men in my own little
way. "

    What a thought provoking intelligent question. Thank you. It's like a pleasant breeze in this sea of hate and putrescence.   

    Think about this, if you are a nice guy you are not ever going to find happiness with a woman,.right? So what are you options? If you become a bad boy you have 80% and probably more of the total amount of women to choose from. As a bad boy you have options that the nice guy does not. Also keep in mind this simple fact. If you are a bad boy you get to choose. If you are nice guy you do not.  

    So let us say 50% of the women that a bad boy seduces are horrible, that still leaves them an option of over 2 to 1 of the so called good women to choose from over the nice guys. Now remember the nice guy does not get to choose. The women get to settle for the nice guys. Remember the nice guys are over 80% of all the left over men. So, in reality they are less than a dime a dozen. If you are a nice guy you have no chance. As a nice guy you have a better chance at winning the lottery or getting hit by lighting than finding the illusive “good woman”. Can it happen? Yes, but I would have a better chance as a bad boy. Definitely!   

    The math is simple. Being stuck in the good guy mode will cripple your potential happiness in life.  

  

Thank you so much for bringing a sane question to this forum.  

 

Brilliant observations. You are so correct.

Just to true.

While I will not dispute this advice, as that it is what I have done for the past 30 years. Be wary. You could be kind, generous and caring to women while eschewing the dating scene, which is what I have done. However, you may end up in the same place I am. In your 40’s, childless while being every girls / woman’s friend. Now, mind you,  it’s not a bad life. I love my nieces and nephews to death. I have more god children than many day care can handle. But if you want kids of your own like I would, then you may have to give up that dream. 

 

Wow lady you are really judgmental and self centered. I have 3 jobs I am an adjunct instructor at an accredited college, I am a full time programmer and I am in the Navy reserve. I volunteer at some local civic organizations including “Big Brothers and Sisters” and am active in supporting a local church.   

The only women I find at any ofthese are gold diggers. I’m not an ugly and un-hygienic guy though I am no Brad Pitt. I am healthy and fit. I’m in better shape now than I ever was in my 20s and 30s.  I’m not rich by any stretch. The moment women find that out they leave so fast it’s almost like watching a cartoon. If a woman stays after finding out I have no money, because I’m still paying on my divorce, they discover I’m a nice guy. I open the door for them. I take them to nice places for dinner, shows or movies. It is almost visible on their face when they discover I’m a nice guy. That, I will always treat them with respect and kindness. They smile and immediately loose interest. I am not relationship material because I won’t treat them like crap.   

So, I am eternally that nice guythat every woman wants as a friend to help them with their plumbing or computer problems. I have come to terms with that over the years. I am ok with being the greatest uncle on earth and having a huge brood of God children but none of my own. I know that I give to my country, friends, community and future generations. If being a nice guy prevents me from having a relationship and kids, well such is life. I just hope that if young men want to have a relationship and kids and happy future with family that they don’t follow my footsteps.  

That is a very sound and observant comment. I would normally agree with you whole heartedly.  However, if you look back along this history of this forum you will find mounting evidence to my claims of "judgmental" and "self centeredness".
I would normally agree with you on the whole "gold diggers" comment as well. I am just sighting my experience. I have watched many of the women around me that are just out there for what they can get. Not all mind you. I have a few wonderful female friends that do not fall in this category. Over all I would like to thank you for your reponse. It was clear and constructive.

If you feel that this is the first time I have said anything that was useful then you really haven’t read anything I have written. Mentioning things about myself is the only difference here, and all that information is irrelevant to my argument. It is only relevant to the establishment of my character. Which has been questioned, berated and under continual attack on this forum. That’s fine with me. I’m not here to make friends. I’m here to help in the only way I know how. 

I have grown comfortable in my ways and do not need to be steered in someone else’s perception of the “Right way”. I will not bash this posting because, as of now, you have been one of the few women I have seen here that has been willing to try to be constructive. For that I am grateful. 

Yes I have been confrontational in response to some outrageous things posted here. I do not hate all women. It is possible however unlikely that my responses have been just as unkind as what I was responding to. The core of message has been consistent across the board.  I am simply stating what I see as a simple fact of life.  

That message is: I have discovered that nice guys do not finish last. They just don’t finish. I am a living example. I have too many female friends that can attest to my nice guy-ness and are close friends. I have watched them over and over pass over a nice guy to be with a bad boy only to get hurt then proclaim all guys are pigs. Rinse and repeat over and over.  

I just want it clear that I was taught early on in life that if you are a good guy. You will find a good woman. I have lived the good guy life and refuse to be anything but an honorable guy.  I feel that I have been tricked by this reasoning and that it simply isn’t true. As much as I wish it were.  

I have grown too old to change so I have come to terms with the fact that I will grow to that old guy that lives alone with his dogs and has lots of nieces and nephews. I am heading to the elephant burial ground for nice guys. I have a lot of friends that will be joining me there, so at least I’ll have company. I have even referred to our group as the “Nice Guys Last” club to my female friends. 

One of our members has a son from his failed marriage. I have warned him not to bring the kid around and use us as role models because he’ll grow up to be like us. He doesn’t listen to me and the boy is already picking up the habits. Young boys have to get there hearts broken early so they can get used to it sooner than later. But this poor kid is in for a life time of misery. He is the sweetest little boy I have ever seen. So I’m scared for him. As he gets older I can only hope he rebels against his fathers behavior or he will be doomed.  

Yes what I have said is unkind but it pales in comparison to that which the both of you have said to the men, including me, on this forum. This is so much the pot calling the kettle black. I have lost count how many times you have passed your lofty judgment on how pitiful, sad and unworthy of a woman’s attention we are and so forth.  

You demand an apology?  I should do so the moment you apologies for what you have written and not a moment before. I tell you what, I am the bigger person I claim to be so yes, I apologies for lowering myself to level of insults that have been the hallmark of the commentary by most of the women on this forum. I came here to tell the truth and got caught up in the flame wars. I got tired of women insulting men because they are trying to fine a little happiness and laughing at their pain. I should have realized that anyone that calls a person sad or pitiful is looking for a fight. I should have been above that. My response to the goading was as puerile as the initial attacks. For that I am sorry.  

Come to think about it. I don’t really want your apology. I know what is right and wrong and I know my intentions are for the betterment of young men that haven’t found their way yet. I do and have not advocated the abuse physical or otherwise of anyone male or female. I simply state to young men “Don’t be a nice guy. Be the Bad Boy they really want.” 

As far as only seeing the negative stuff. Well you really haven’t shown me anything positive or constructive so, what am I to think? You can continue to hate me and what I stand for and I’ll still not care. Young men need to be warned. I continue try to be part of the solution. Can you?