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Messages By: tetley22
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October 23, 2008, 7:08 am PDT
 Quote From: eddie3021 3 yrs. ago my 34 yr. old daughter attempted suicide & then again 2 yrs. later. Thank God she failed both times. One thing that we as a family did not have availabe was, (other then therapy) a place to go and talk about our feelings. To be able to share how we were feeling with other people that had gone through the same thing. After all this time, we as a family still have not healed completely. After my daughter's first attempt she still had custody of her 2 daughters. The second time her ex-husband took the girls from where they had been living. The year before he left my daughter and 2 grandaughters at a birthday party at my oldest daughters house and called later that day and said they could not go back to his mother's to live with him, he could live their but not my daughter or grandaughters (the girls were 4 & 5 yrs. old). 3 months later (after going to a marriage counselor) he told me daughter he did not want to be married anymore. To this day my heart still aches for her. For a while my other 3 daughters would have nothing to do with her. My youngest daughter still feels pretty much the same that she did then, I wanted to tell you my story so that maybe you can find a place that people can go and talk about their loved ones and how they as a family can deal with a suicide attempt.
Thank you. Try Catholic Charities(specifically, the L.O.S.S. program),) or the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention ( AFSP,) or even the Willow Creek church. Catholic Charities has the "Loving Outreach to Suicide Survivers", (LOSS) program that has meetings where families can meet and also has 8 wk. educational sessions for a nominal fee. Willow Creek is a nondemonitional church that happens to have tremendous programs for support, such as divorce, grief, and other issues. You do not have to go to church or even be Christian or Catholic to go to these organizations. For a nominal fee, most around 15-35 dollars, you can attend the educational sessions. Most groups are free. It sounds like your daughter needs intensive psychiatric help, not just family and group support, as important as that all may be. If she can prove she is in treatment, she may be able to get her kids back if the court was who took them out of her home to begin with. You didn't mention HOW they came to leave, just that she couldn't have them anymore. Some psychiatric diagnoses can put others in danger, not just the patient. Again, you didn't say specifically if she was diagnosed with something. GET HER TO A DOCTOR and then a good custody lawyer who can help. The American Foundation for Suicide Prevention also has loads of educational and research available for anyone. All these places you can "Google" to get the websites. Godspeed, and good luck
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October 23, 2008, 8:27 am PDT
Quote From: cgorin As I sit here and watch tonights show on suicide and the documentary, The Bridge, I cant help but reflect on my own personal experience with this issue.
I fear that suicide will become an epidemic within the next year as people struggle to cope with the declining economy and their own personal issues.
I attempted suicide at age 17 shortly after disclosing to my parents a dark secret that my dads brother sexually abused me for several years. I received immediate intervention. However, depression has plagued me my entire life.
Four years ago, I contemplated suicide but couldnt get my children out of my head and I called my mom the day I was going to do it. I was in therapy during that time with a cognitive therapist. When I arrived for a session, she knew something was wrong and I was immediately instructed to go to a hospital.
Prior to that session, I felt I needed help and I began to research facilities, but had not completed my research. When my therapist instructed me to go to the hospital, I felt overwhelmed, as I had not researched the facility she told me to go to. I sat in my car in her driveway and called my dad as he taught me to conduct research on everything. He convinced me to go.
I spent two weeks in the hospital followed by two weeks of outpatient therapy. While in the hospital, I met my current boyfriend who was there for depression as well.
To make a long story short, within a year of being released from the hospital, I got divorced and my whole life changed and it hasnt improved since. I now live with the man I met in the hospital and it isnt a healthy relationship by any means.
A year ago, I was laid off from a job that I worked for ten years. I have struggled to find employment. This, combined with my home life and other issues, has raised my depression level.
A month ago, I quit taking Zoloft cold turkey as I cannot afford meds anymore. I am in jeopardy of losing my home, car, etc. Everything is going wrong in my life and a lot of it is my fault. On a DAILY basis, I think of suicide and some days I have really considered it.
On the outside I appear to be a happy go lucky person with a great sense of humor. But the fact of the matter is that I hide behind the laughter.
I have written, but not completed a good bye letter that is currently on this computer. When I think of committing suicide I almost always think of my children and what it would do to them. I also have a new 4 month old grandbaby that I consider as well.
My sister-in-law lost her father to suicide as he lost his job and felt he could not support his family any longer. His suicide completely devastated her and her mom as well as my family. Her mom desperately searched for a letter, but that letter was never written.
My fear is that, although I feel I have control over my suicidal thoughts, will there come a time where enough is enough and the thought of my children and what this could do to them is not enough for me to stop.
Although I do own a gun, I couldnt do it that way. Ive thought of a different way.
I struggle everyday to improve my life, but I feel alone, havent any support and seem to be spinning in circles. My daughter, 18, has called me on my bad days and she worries Im sure.
There are better options: 1. Get a different doctor and therapist, they should have called 911 if you were suicidal in the office visit. In that state of mind, which is not a rational one, doing research is NOT an option. 2. Ask about different meds. Some meds are SIMPLY NOT A GOOD FIT. I speak from experience, that the right meds can and WILL make you better. You can get $4 Rx's from Walmart and you haven't mentioned your age, perhaps the insurance company and/or DRUG co. can sometimes assist people with expensive meds. The generics are usually just as good as brand name. 3. Does your father know about the abuse you suffered as a child? You may not only be suffering from depression but also, POST TRAUMATIC STRESS DISORDER which puts you at a higher risk of suicide. 4. Your Dad and family need to go to therapy too. Suicide is a PERMANENT solution for a temporary condition. If you are in crisis, and it seems like you are, pick up the phone and call1-800-273-8255, this is the National Suicide Prevention line. PLEASE DO IT NOW, DO NOT WAIT!! THERE IS HELP!! YOU ARE NOT ALONE! |
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October 23, 2008, 8:42 am PDT
Quote From: mojavewolf You do not know how happy I was to see your show tonight on Suicide awareness! I lost my husband Mark to Suicide 18 months ago..I could relate to everything those parents felt except it was my spouse.it hurts ..I have been trying to get someone to have a show on this epidemic..I even wrote to the dr. Phil show..I was very angry when i wrote,because i was hurting so bad and I wanted Suicide to get out to the public..It just seemed to me like no one wanted to talk about it,yet it goes on every 16 minutes with another lost loved one.I myself have felt suicidal since the loss of my husband..I cant stress this enouse that we need to educate educate..Thank you dr. Phil for your show..I want to give you a Big hug and kiss for it..you are awesome..your show reaches alot of people and if i would of seen something like your show today before i lost my husband maybe i could of helped him.He is loved very much and terribly missed...I do have the book that you mentioned on your show."Why people die by Suicide" there are many good books out there for survivors..There are also good internet support groups ,such as FFOS,and POS ..One is Frinds and family of suicide and parents of suicide..this group has helped me alot..I have alsogotten involved with AFSP..Wonderful group Actress Mariette Hartley cofounded.great Lady and also a suicide survivor. I refuse to be silent,while every 16 minutes we lose someone to this killer and every 17 minutes there are people like me (suicide survivors) left in pain and to try and make sense of what happened.I can go on and on..but basically..You Rock ! Dr.Phil and I will come on your show anyday to talk about this killer and what it does to shout this out to the world...((BIG KIDDO's TO YOU DR PHIL)) I am sure alot of us survivors who try and try to get people to air shows such as this feel the same as i do... I am deeply sorry for your recent loss of your husband. I lost my 17 yr. old nephew to suicide 6 months ago and feel some of what you are feeling, though I suspect, most I will never know. The common feelings of wanting to commit suicide yourself is actually not unusual after a suicide of a close loved one. It is NOT normal, however, if you have a plan and the means to carry this plan out. The feelings of wanting to "shout out" about it I share as well. My family just did the AFSP's walk, "Out of the Darkness." Someday, I may do the overnight walk as well. I am going to attend a seminar this weekend in Chicago called, "Dying Too Soon." I am finding various ways to "shout out" about it. My sister may start a scholarship at Andre's high school for someone who may exhibit exceptional reaching out abilities to fellow students. Maybe chosen by their peers. She hasn't yet made up her mind. The next thing is contacting our LEGISLATORS to demand more education in schools, and of parents especially if they have a child diagnosed as clinically depressed or with Bi polar Disorder. |
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