Messages By: heather175

When it comes to breast feeding in public I feel a mother should feed her child when her child is hungry. I do however feel that a mother should not expose herself either. It's not necessary to show yourself. It's about nourishing your child and being able to bond with them at the same time,Not showing 1,000's of people that you have breast.  

  

On condoms in school I have a very strong opinion. I was 16 when I had my 1st child. I don't think I would have necessarily asked a guidance counselor for a condom if they had been available but maybe others would have. I feel very strongly that kids should be educated about sex and it's consequences, but encouraged to abstain! Educating the kids about sex is primarily the parents responsibility and it's definitely the parents responsibility to instill values in them. I speak openly with my children about anything that may arise in life. I have explained that there are ways of protecting themselves but the most important thing is to think about the consequences of your actions before you do something. I have asked them to have enough respect for themselves to not go against our belief to abstain until marriage (& learn from choices I made) but to think about how those choices will affect their child(ren). 

  

  

I couldn't agree more!!!  Nourishing is necessary, Not exposing one's self.

I think it's a prime example of how we all judge people without knowing the complete story. Thank you for reminding us all that maybe we should "Think before we speak". Good for you for at least being responsible for your situation.

Please don't ever be offended unless you know all the facts of that situation. I tried to breast feed my son for his benefit and was unsuccessful. I produced milk but it would not come out. I attempted breast feeding my daughter hoping that what ever was the cause of my problem with my son had been resolved. No such luck! Therefore I was forced to bottle feed my children. Some time Iater, I learned that my grandmother had lost her firstborn child due to the very same thing. She tried to breast feed and didn't realize milk was not being expressed and her son starved. She never forgave herself for that. So before you pass judgment on a bottle being used.... think! That may be that childs only source of nourishment.

Before you spout off about what is "Junk" please be informed that formula may be the only source of nourishment for a child. I will totally agree that breast milk is best only if the mother eats and drinks nutritiously and (such as in my case) that milk is able to be expressed from the breast (which mine was not). Both my children had to be bottle fed. They are both very healthy, very smart ( straight A's) and very well behaved children. The funny thing is my sister breastfed both of her children and they both are constantly sick and have behavior issues. So I say do what is best for your circumstances but don't judge others decisions unless you know all the facts. That "junk" that child is consuming may be far better than the "junk" that child's mother consumed and is passing along to her baby.

Both of my children were bottle fed and certainly not because of "lifestyle" issues. I had to because I could not express milk from my breast. Therefore my children would have starved had they not been fed formula. Let me also say that they are and have always been very healthy. They are smart, healthy, good kids. My sister on the other hand whom breast fed both of her children has two children who are constantly sick and have behavior and speech problems. I have had read my research and I am sorry you have been burdened with higher health cost. But what can you say in these circumstances? Life doesn't always fit into a perfect little box. And I am sure that for some kids it is best to be bottle fed. If they are to consume what is passed through to them through breastmilk then they may benefit better from being fed formula through a bottle.

I knew because my breast were engorged and yet nothing came out!!!! Do you not ware breast pads to prevent any leakage? I didn't have to because I did not have any leakage. NOTHING came out! So no I couldn't have even though I really wanted too. The point was is that you shouldn't assume to know everyone's reasons for choosing to bottle or breast feed. Again you assumed to know my reasons and were way off base. If you are able and choose to breast feed then by all means you should. It will benefit you and your child. But if you can't or choose not to breast feed then you and your child can still benefit. I held and bonded with my children during bottle feedings just as if I would have if I were breast feeding. I held them and sang to them just the same. That was a personal choice. Because I do realize that some parents make the choice to bottle feed for the wrong reasons.  

So please tell how you can say in one sentence that less then 1% of women can't breast feed end then say in another sentence that "There is probably no reason at all why you couldn't have breastfed. It's hard sometimes... but if you had really wanted to, you could have." Did it ever occur that just maybe I was part of where research has concluded that 1% figure from? 

Thank you very much for sharing your experience. I am so glad that it did turn out well for you. 

  

It was an issue that I could not. I was using that as one example of how I became aware that there may be a problem. There were others. I could not and it was something that was discussed with my physician. My Grandmother had lost her 1st born actually from the same thing. Not saying it is hereditary and if someone in your family has something similar happen you shouldn't try. It was not my 1st choice to bottle feed but in the end it worked out for all of us. My children are 13 & 10 now and both are straight A students and very seldom become ill. We have a great relationship and I am not at all second guessing that bottle fed children don't have the opportunity to grow to be healthy, happy honorable adults. There are always going to be things that happen in life that may not follow text books guidelines. We just need to try to make the best of our circumstances and not be judge mental. That was my main point to begin with. To not be judge mental when you may not be aware of all the details. 

Again thank you very much for sharing your experience. It shows that some circumstances may be similar but the end result may be different and it will only help others understand not everybody's bodies always work as designed. 

How sweet, thank you. Actually both of my children latched right on and sucked like a hoover but it just didn't come out. I actually held my children as if I were breast feeding and that worked just as well. I knew that they were getting nourishment and we still were able spend our time together. I don't feel that my children were deprived of anything that would alter them as healthy children or adults.  

  

I was just trying to say that I don't see why everyone has to be so judgmental of the decision to bottle feed or to breast feed. I really feel it is an individual decision based on ones own life circumstances. There certainly great benefits of breast feeding but certainly nobody should be judged poorly for bottle feeding. Just as nobody should be judged for breast feeding as needed. I didn't buy baby foods with meats in them because they had meat by products. I pureed my own. But I don't look down my nose at anyone who feeds their child baby food with meat in it. It doesn't make someone a bad parent who does. It's just not right to judge others choices, that's all. Especially if we don't know all that can happen to influence ones choices. 

  

Thank goodness it will not be an issue for me in the future. I have chose to not have any more children. My 13 and 10 year old have been such blessings and I am content with that. But thank you for having compassion and offering guidance. 

  

Hello.... I just came across this msg. board and thought it may be helpful. I am 30 and have battled with my depression since I was a child. Recently though I had a complete melt down & was briefly hospitalized. I am feeling much better than I was. I have started meds (which was scary for me) and I am suppose to be going to a psychatrist but I don't have ins. and neither myself or my husband currently have a job.  I ahve not worked in over a year because I was in a horse accident which put me out for about 8 1/2 months and then 2 weeks after I got the green light my son's Dr. suspected a genetic problem with him so we have spent the past 6 mos. going to specialist. It's very hard to find an employer that wants to hire you and let you take so much time off to take your child to the Dr.'s all the time. Everything with my son has come back really well & he doesn't need to be seen by any specialist for 2 years unless something comes up. Yeah!!! So now I am job hunting. 

Sorry i could blah, blah, blah forever. Just wanted to introduce myself and maybe make some friends. 

  

God Bless, 

Heather