Messages By: jacobp

I'm so happy to see Dr. Nicolosi and Stanton on the Dr. Phil show. I can't wait to see this. I'm not sure how it will go because typically, popular opinion is against exgays.  But I'm here to show my support. I hope that the prejudices against exgays and those of us who know that change is indeed possible aren't disrespected just because it is not a popular view these days.

I discovered reorientation therapy in 2003 and it has changed my life. I'm so much happier than i was before. I feel that I'm growing into my manhood.  It is such a relief especially when you have supportive friends to help you on the journey!  For those who want to pursue an "alternative lifestyle" that is their decision, but don't forget to support exgays as well. We do exist and we are not going away! If you support diversity, then support exgays too.

No amount of lies by opponents that exgays are not real will make change, for at least some, any less possible!  Change is possible. I have witnessed it in my own life!  Some say we are just bisexual. But taht is not true! During all my youth i was never attracted to females!

We are NOT stupid! We know who we are, and we know we have changed.  It is so distressing to listen to someone try to convince us that we've not changed. It is like someone trying to convince you that you are insane or crazy!  How would you like for someone to talk to you like that? We come from all walks of life. Some exgays are doctors, lawyers, etc. I'm a computer programmer for over 8 years now.

True some opponents feel that exgays are an insult to them.  I don't deny what i believe to be the truth about homosexuality. Yet if a person wants to pursue a particular way of life, that is his wish but please don't stop people who want change.

Though the previews weren't welcoming. i hope the overall show is more respectful than what I've seen in the past.  Best wishes!

(I am not in any way implying that people choose to be gay. That is another insult and it is a misapplication of what exgays believe and stand for. People don't choose to have homosexual inclinations. He can and does choose afterwards what type of life he will live and whether or not he will at least pursue a change in those inclinations. Exgays choose to change not only their behavior but also their inclinations!  Many of us succeed.  Some don't. But that is the same as with anything a person battles with. Ex-ex-gays prove that ex-gays are false just as much as ex-ex-smoker, who tried to quit but began smoking again, prove that ex-smokers are fake. Exgays exist and we are not going away!)

My hope is that this show will open the doorway for more RESPECTFUL discussion.

I understand your position. I respect your viewpoint but I don't know about this statement "homosexuality can't be cured!" 

I'm an exgay. I've had success with change. Simply because you've never met others who have changed doesn't mean change is impossible.

I'm an exgay. I have changed!  These issues are very complicated.They do require more than a simple explanation. But just because they can't be explained in simple sound bites doesn't mean they are not valid or REAL!

Believe me, i understand your frustration. But you can't speak for the whole race of people just like i can't. 

It is WELL ESTABLISHED??? SINCE WHEN???? Yes there is prejudices against change therapy but your comments can't be substantiated.  I'm a so-called VICTIM!  And I LOVE NICOLOSI!  He changed my life!

I am so shocked at how closed minded people are about change. They have allowed TV to tell them what to think. I appreciate your comments. I too have been greatly helped by Dr. Nicolosi. These people sling their insults around at Nicolosi as if they are BONAFIDE FACT! THere are many people who have changed! I too read this book. It DOES NOT blame parents. Itsimply tells parents what to look for and how they might respond.

Read his book, Nicolosi is in no way saying that parents are the sole cause of their child's gender issues. It is obvious that sometimes PARENTS are the cause. They shape a child's life in many ways. Why can't they shape a child's view of his own gender!  MY PARENTS SHAPED MY VIEW!  Did they do it on purpose? Was it ENTIRELY their fault i turned out the way i did? Nicolosi is not saying that! He only says that they MAY contribute to it. He also believes other things POSSIBLY contribute as well. He then offers POSSIBLE SOLUTIONS to help the child feel better about his gender. IS that so hard to understand?

Again, Nicolosi is not saying that a child knows the difference between a Barbie doll and a He-Man or GI Joe doll!  He is simply avocating that he child be introduced to his or her gender role. This is just plain common sense. Come on guys!  Every parent does it. "No that's for girls!"  Some people have a disorder,so they need a little more help. That is all he is saying.

I can't say that all people can change. I can only say that Nicolosi has helped me.